Working in I.T.
I speak to people who fake thier own level of computer knowledge just to sound impressive, but in effect increasing the time it takes for me to fix thier problem and more often or not winding that person up further.

Them - No Internet!
Me - Sorry to hear that, now you have the computer on in front of you? Good, now firstly click the 'Start' button please.
Them - Done.
Me - Now click on the 'Control Panel' please.
Them - Ok, yeah go on.
Me - you do you have 9 catergories on there or 20 to 30 small items listed in the Control Panel?
Them - Urrrrr.....
Me - You have the Control Panel open?
Them - Is that the blue E? I've got no internet!
Me - It sounds to me that you have a classic case of wax poisoning, from eating too many crayons you fucking retard. Have you tried buying a newspaper instead or possibly going outside?

Utter utter twats. Wastes my time and pisses them off when we have to start again. So when this happens to me I start again and go as slow as it is humanly possible from that point, just to piss them off more.
( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Thu 10 Jul 2008, 17:57, Reply)