Middle Management
A collection of the biggest fakers that I'll ever work with. My immediate management who work close with our teams are ok; they do actively help us do our jobs and are actually quite competent. The people they report to however are a shower of NVQ fakers who have "Virtual Meetings" about the business.

These meetings are not really called that, but they may as well be named that as they come up with some ideas which can only be best described as "imaginative".

My current job is to fix people's internet issues etc, but I don't get rated on whether I fix the actual issue at all. Due to the delights of Middle Management, my job performance is mainly rated on saying sorry and thank you at the right time. I could fix every issue under the sun, but if I've not apologised at some point I will not get that bonus, allowing for other fuckwit fakers to fly through the recruitment system being the Apple of the Management's Eye.

We've spoken to them at length to sort this out but they hit us with the NVQ phrases, the newest of which is "Sky Blue Thinking". If anyone says that to me again I'll headbutt the fucker.

How there are jobs like this is beyond me, plus the fact that they get paid double the average worker to do a fake job is even more of a kick in the bollocks. They ought to be rounded up in a farm and culled.
( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 9:24, 5 replies)

Where can I do one of these GNVQ's?
Destroy it from the inside...
( Sonic James Doom forgetting the date since... umm..., Fri 11 Jul 2008, 9:50, closed)

...
Just don't let them 'touch base' with you.
( scoshi pretending to diet since, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 9:59, closed)

And you'd better be stealthy
in case someone gives them a 'heads up' and they start 'throwing ideas around' and 'thinking outside the box'.

What utter pish.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 10:20, closed)

I've heard of "blue sky thinking" before...
Is "Sky Blue Thinking" something to do with Coventry City...?
(Vice Admiral Sir Charles Cockbrush KCB MBE DSO, who is finding it increasingly difficult to log into b3ta.com wants to duck your aunt and kick your puppy, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 10:39, closed)

@cockbrush
think about that sentence... coventry and thinking?
( sudo is bored, Fri 11 Jul 2008, 13:52, closed)