* PFFT *I've been pretty farty all week, but 2 large helpings of sausage and lentil stew last night have really tipped things over the edge. I swear you can see these ones.
I'm here at work trying to hold them in so I (a) don't have to keep nipping to the loo like a madman and (b) don't gas half the office, but it's becoming increasingly difficult. I might rupture something if I'm not careful.
Tell us all about your own fartiness.
(
chthonic, Fri 13 Jul 2007, 14:01)
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Ah farts ARE funny...Let me see...
1, Ex girlfriend who only ever ate Kormas for some unknown reason and was quite ladylike otherwise, would trump her arse off in bed. I remember cuddling up to her one night and having the unmistakable aroma of arse wafting up from under the duvet. She swallowed the ball off her tongue bar one day and I suggested if she had to guff she pointed herself away from people... instant new nicname... "The Musket".
2, Friend of mine at work once turned up for his shift and told us this little story... "I woke up and to my utter horror found my girlfriend's ring about 2 inches from my nose, cheeks held apart by her as she let fly with a massive postern blast which sent her into fits of giggles. And she looked such a nice girl normally.!
3, Sitting eating breakfast with my bro one morning he dropped a fart that sounded EXACTLY like a motorbike passing outside. I even looked out the window.!
3, My workplace is mostly populated by women, but upstairs it is us men that dominate (shopfloor versus stockroom) and this leads to a massive amount of chuffing, guffing and breaking of wind. The worst are post curry or chinese with my bum giving resounding smells but sod all noise. The slightly chubbier staff have the extra bummage to create noises usually only found eminating from the back of badly maintained buses.
And 4, The fine art of nipping into your brothers room while he is brushing his teeth at night, farting mightily into the pillow then running away. Brilliant fun.
(, Sat 14 Jul 2007, 17:45, Reply)
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