Is it just me?
Or is QOTW mean at the moment?

Food is a thing of joy. Even if you can't cook, you can eat and it's a wonderful thing.

I can cook and very much enjoy doing so.

As an antedote to the meanness of this QOTW I am going to tell you what I would cook if I could go on "Come Dine With Me"

Starter: Scallops with Bacon, with a Spinach and Pinenut salad

Main: Smoked Haddock in Creme Fraiche Sauce, served with potato dauphinoise and asparagus

Dessert: Chocolate Cherry Mousse Surprise

This would be accompanied by some Boujolais Nouveau and some party games.

Let me know what you think of my menu

In the spirit of this QOTW, the worse sabotage I've ever committed is to give someone who's annoyed me the least nicely arranged plate. If they haven't annoyed me, I take it myself.

I do this with the dog as well.
(Jugular, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 9:30, 22 replies)

my meal
Starter: a Ferrero Rocher
Mains: Goodfellas margarita pizza
Dessert: two Ferrero Rocher

Wine: Blue Nun
Liquer: That bottle of fruit schnapps we bought in Austria 5 years ago.
(frankspencer, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 9:34, closed)

Three Ferrero Rocher?

You're really spoiling us.
( Moey, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 10:55, closed)

Jugular
I'd eat that! sounds good

I'd do scallops and black pudding with a sweet tomato salsa and rocket
seared tuna steak with braised pak choi and mash with soy and chives
creme brulee

mmmm
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 9:39, closed)

I'm loving the creme brulee
It is my very favourite pud.

Or is it Jam roly poly?

Dammit!
(Jugular, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 10:06, closed)

One of my favourite pub questions is
"What would be your last meal" if you were on death row.

I have found over the years, that a good proportion of people - 40-50% give the same answer for the main course - sausage and mash with onion gravy. I'm one of them. The number 2 answer is steak.

But your right, food is a thing of joy and shouldnt be abused. Unless its funny.
( I have run out of coke is a little sweaty, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 9:40, closed)

last wedding I want to
the main course was sausages, mash, veg and gravy

it was fucking brilliant
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 9:41, closed)

At our wedding...
...we had curry. Everyone still raves about it. I don't think any of them remember the man and woman doing vows and stuff; they just remember the food.

Tip: If you're getting married, just give your guests a bit of dry chicken so you're not upstaged.
( Olembe Refuses to write in this space, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 11:41, closed)

Maybe we should have a b3ta come dine with me?
But perhaps not at my house?
(Jugular, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 10:06, closed)

Boujolais Nouvea?

what kind of sicko are you?
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 19 Sep 2008, 10:11, closed)

Depends what time of year of course
If it's summer, I'll do a nice sancerre
(Jugular, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 10:12, closed)

time of year?
BN is ALWAYS disgusting gut-rot. why else do the french drink so little of it themselves and make sure they sell it all to the rest of the world? any wine that needs an advertising budget that big has just got to be evil.

with that menu i'd probably go for (as you suggest) a sancerre or perhaps a tourraine, but just about any Loire white or rose would do nicely. that's if we're only considering one tiny area of the world.

made a lovely scallop, prawn and smoked bacon risotto last friday and we had an argentinian gewurztraminer with it, worked splendidly.

beaujolais nouveau? bleh!
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 19 Sep 2008, 10:55, closed)

I LOVE Scallops.

I LOVE Bacon.

Together though? I feel they would both detract from one another.

I'm no good at anything fancy but my starter would likely involve Scallops or King Prawns (cooked well of course!!), main course would involve some Rare to Medium Rare Aberdeen Angus Rump Steak (cooked the way Gordon Ramsay showed me on TV which involves butter I think and basting the steak with the juices as it cooks). Home made chips, onions rings, fried mushrooms of many variety, grilled tomato halves and corn on the cob with a lump of butter.

I'm not a desert man so I'd like to collapse in front of the fire with mates and slowly get drunk on cheap lager. Once food is digested move onto Vodka Red Bulls, go into town and GET FUCKING HAMMERED.

Then presumably I would be executed as this is what the question stipulates? Method? I would probably prefer high calibre pistol to the back of the head as I slept after collapsing home drunk.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 10:13, closed)

Hmm...
Starter - Strong Tomato and Basil soup, served with fresh bread, still hot from the oven.

Main - Slow roasted pork chops, served with green beans and tartiflette (http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v228/GrimReefer/Tartiflette.jpg)

Pudding - Banoffee pie running to my Mum's recipe (it contains an entire mars bar).

As for wine, I don't have a clue!
I would provide this ale - www.fraoch.com/shop.htm (at the top)

I'm not a fan of 'posh' cooking, I much prefer a well cooked home dinner, you can't beat a good Spaghetti Bolognaise!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 10:47, closed)

Can you post your mum's banoffee pie recipe please?
I'd love to have a crack at doing one that featured a whole mars bar.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 11:09, closed)

I'll ask my sister
And get it on here soon.

If not this week, I'll gaz it to you
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 11:29, closed)

Ta!

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 11:39, closed)

Had a great meal last night
A bit, well, a lot OT, but after last night I feel like giving up cooking altogether so "Come Dine With Me", becomes "Come round mine and we'll get a cab and eat out".

Went to "Green Tea", a new-ish chinese restaurant, Burton road, Didsbury, south Manchester.

It was one of those rare dining experiences where I *knew* with every mouthful that I was eating something that I could never make as well myself if I lived to be a million years old.

Starters:

Her - Salt and pepper chicken skewers.
Moi - Wonton soup.

The wonton soup is a standard, but the broth was tasty and light, the wontons were tiny little home made affairs, rather than the "bought from the chinese supermarket frozen in a slab" ones that you normally get. The two complemented each other perfectly.

The chicken skewers were out of this world. Crisp on the outside, juicy and succulent on the inside, with a subtle, growing chili tang that grew hot, but not too hot, allied with lovely garlicy undertones and general peppery-ness.

Mains:

Her - Szechuan chilli chicken. (A pattern emerges - she loves hot food!)

Me - Beef with vegetables in black bean sauce.

This was accompanied by some fried rice and some plain chow mein to fill in the gaps.

Her chilli chicken was authentic Szechuan - it actually contained real Szechuan pepper which is so fiercely hot it kind of numbs your mouth for a couple of seconds and then the rich flavours come flooding through. A triumph.

My beef was beautifully tender - on the menu, it said just "beef", not "fillet steak", and the price reflected this, but you could cut the damn stuff with a spoon. The sauce was dark, complex and pungent with the fermented beans to the fore and the veggies were cooked but still full of life and freshness. At this point I was wishing I had a larger stomach in order to fit more in.

The rice was as good as rice gets with a nice nuttyness of sesame oil somewhere in there, while the noodles were al dente with onion and crisp beansprouts mixed in.

Truth be told, we'd have got away with ordering 1 rice, rather than 2 rice plus noodles, but they kindly put our leftovers in a doggy-bag - well doggy container - to take home and zap, once the gut busting feeling had subsided.

Cost? above-mentioned food + 4 bottles of beer, approx £40. Cheaper than anything comparable in Manc's Chinatown (eg. Litlle Yang Sing), more expensive than local takeaways, but far, far better. You pays for quality!

Sorry to come over all "Lloyd Grossman", but this was the finest dining experience I've had in a long time. Bizarrely, the place has got a couple of shocking writeups in the local press, while everyone I know who's been there raves about it, much like I'm doing here.

The waitress mentioned that they're going for a more home-cooking approach, rather than merely emulating the standard brit-chinese restaurant fare, which may have offended the reviewer's jaded palate...

If you live nearby, give it a try. You will not be disappointed. This place deserves to succeed.
(apologies_for_length, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 11:25, closed)

I live in Fallowfield
and you've convinced me. Anniversary dinner is now a toss-up between Greens and Green Tea!
(Holloway_Girl To err is to be human, to be a fool is to believe, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 21:40, closed)

Every Thursday is Junk Food Thursday
Last night was Fish Fingers (seven), chips and a whole tin of beans.

Lovely.
( Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 11:55, closed)

Boujolais Nouveau?
Why would you want to drink alcoholic Ribena? I'd go for a nice Chablis or Tesco Value Larger with the fish!
(Crowman, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 13:14, closed)

Dessert
What is the "surprise" in the Chocolate Cherry Mousse Surprise?

Due to the rest of the QOTW, I autmatically thought something along the lines of poo or jizm. Corrupted.

You've made me hungry now (not for poo or jizm...oh dear).
(Holloway_Girl To err is to be human, to be a fool is to believe, Fri 19 Sep 2008, 21:42, closed)

The surprise is
rum soaked chocolate muffins

It's not my recipe I might add, it's Delia Smith's
(Jugular, Mon 22 Sep 2008, 9:32, closed)