Yet more Freebird
Right, the only personal heckle I've come up with of any originality was when watching Joy Divison wannabes The Editors. Having enjoyed thoroughly a far too short set by The Rakes, and impatient to see the main draw of Franz Ferdinand, I was a bit bored with the whining voice of the lead singer spastically thrashing his guitar about on stage. Cue repeated requests for him to play Love Will Tear Us Apart. No such luck.

To add to the Bill Hicks Freebird heckle, there's a brilliant one on Modest Mouse's EP, Baron Von Bullshit Rides again, which goes as follows:

Guy in Crowd: Play Freebird!
MM Lead Singer (Isaac Brock): I know I have said this before, but the odds of us actually playing Freebird?

There are no odds. It is not going to happen.

I will start off with the first reason. We have no idea how to play Freebird.

The second reason is. In the Love Bug's natural habitat, that would fucking kill him and you wouldn't want that. He is fucking adorable. He is cute.

Thirdly, even if, pick your deity, came down from the heavens or wherever or the hills or wherever the deity lives and blessed us with this vast knowledge of Freebird. And we could play it backwards and sing it backwards.

We still just wouldn't do it.

(pause)

If this were the Make A Wish Foundation and you were going to die in 20 minutes just long enough to play Freebird, we still wouldn't play it.

Here is the end reason. The end reason is that life is just too fucking short to hear or play Freebird.

And one final contribution, again not my own. I just have to mention sledging, the practice of heckling a batsman in cricket. Now I'll go back to my lurkhole.
(LickOutTheJamsMotherfuckers!, Tue 11 Apr 2006, 23:19, Reply)