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This is a question Why I was late

"On the way to the station, I got hit by a bat, it almost took my head clean off. Then the machine would not accept my ticket and the guy at the gate didn't think I looked like the photo on my travel card. So I had to go home and get my passport.

Then the train was 45 minutes late to the station because of the dangerous badger threat at Carpenters Park.

When I was on the train it took and hour and a half to get past the biscuit factory because the driver was really fat.

Then there was a delay stopping at the station because the train in front had heard we were coming and decided to play a practical joke with a rubber shoe on the track.

That is why I couldn't get here on time today."

What's your best excuse?

(, Thu 28 Jun 2007, 10:36)
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Floods!
No not recently, but about 7 or so years ago I was on my Year In Industry working at National Grid in Leatherhead (most joyous town of excitement and er joy - not. Seriously if you go to Leatherhead take a cricket bat and scalpel so you can perform an auto-labotomy, it is the most heinously god awful and boring place on the surface of this planet.). Another YII chap worked at the same place and lived near my home so he drove up from Winch every Monday morning and back every Friday night and I hitched a ride for beer money etc.

Anyway this was at the time of year when the really really bad floods hits. We were going up the M3 to join the M25 and the traffic stopped. No great shakes, turned on the radio thinking oh well be an hour or so late.

Luckily we had provisions in the car, it was clear that other people in cars around us didnt.

Up comes the announcement "The M25 is shut between J13 and J9". Bascically we were at J9 and needed to get to J13 (if I remember rightly the junction numbers). Fucksocks.

So we detour through Sunbury, Kingston on Thames and Chessington way, which is where the entire traffic volume of Monday morning M3 rush hour cars are going too.

We had a lovely view of some towns as we pootled through at considerably less than walking pace, luckily with the Radio (Radio 1 before it turned to shit) and food for sustenance. Usually M3 to sitting at the desk at work took maybe 25 minutes.

6 and a half hours later I stroll into work and sit down, the boss raises an eyebrow and asks why Im so late.

"Floods on the M25". He gives a knowing nod and says, well you're so late you might as well go home.

"Cheers Boss!" *waves as he disappears out the door. :D winner!


A side note I am often late for most things and both my parents are the same. We try and fit too much in to whatever time we have and as a result 9 times out of 10 end up being late or arriving by the skin of our teeth. I 100% genuinely truly meant to be early, I just have some neurological condition that prevents me from actually being early, unless the missus is involved in which case she is usually enough force to get me there on time. So this a big fuck off to those people who made comments about late people being lazy and just can't be bothered to turn up early. I really do try it just never happens. I am lazy but that's not why Im always late.
(, Fri 29 Jun 2007, 12:29, Reply)

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