Ill
Me: Morning Doc, I seem to be coughing up blood.
Doc: Lift up your shirt *listens to breathing with stethoscope* Hmmmm, could be a chest infection, I'll prescribe you some antibiotics.
Me: Ok, thank you. I also seem to be having a problem with my leg, it's like the calf muscle has gone rock solid and I can't bend it properly.
Doc: *Has a look, a squeeze and a brief massage of the area* Hmmmmm, you've probably hurt the muscle, take some ibruprofen.
Me: Ok, thank you. I was a bit worried it was a blood clot in there.
Doc: Well, you can visit the hospital if you want and get them to look.
Me: Thanks Doc. Bye.

The chest infection and sore leg was a Deep Vein Thrombosis, leading to pulmonary embolisms (part of the clot breaks, goes through your FUCKING HEART and in to your lungs). I had another enter my lungs whilst in the hospital, more than likely because the bloody doctor massaged the area!

But the worst part, oh the very worst part, was having the frightened and cold Little Smurf exposed to the lovely Student Nurse whilst the Doctor jiggled my testicles around. I still don't know why he did this. Can anyone tell me why he felt the need to caringly manipulate each testicle in his cold rough hands? It was my leg and lungs that were the problem, not the area between.
(Big Smurf Brush me daddy-O, Thu 11 Mar 2010, 20:29, 2 replies)

yes, I know...
but forgive me, you have such nice testicles.
(8allright is praying you've got a cold, Thu 11 Mar 2010, 20:36, closed)

Lucky!
You are lucky to have survived. I hope you found yourself a new GP, your old one sounds pretty crappy.
(Woofie, Thu 11 Mar 2010, 21:22, closed)