Abcesses
I have so many now (a propensity due to diabetes, see my post below) that I'm pretty used to these bad boys, and antibiotics take too long to take effect - two days to realise it is actually what you fear, two days to get round to calling dentist/doctor, two days to appointment (minimum) to get script and for drugs to kick in == too fucking long.

Take one sewing needle, sterilise with flame and lance it good and proper. Have no fear, and lance in several places, and make sure you squeeze as much pus out the fucker as you can - until it just bleeds.

Helps if you have had some alcohol first though - not for sterilisation reasons. Rinse liberally with antiseptic mouthwash.

Should clear up next day.

PS - I am NOT a dentist, so take above with a pinch of salt and some proper medical advice.
( DeadEyeDick, Wed 17 Mar 2010, 2:23, Reply)