Multiculturalism in 1980s Kent
My nursery school teacher was by all accounts (well according to my Dad) very nice but a few chicken wings short of a bucket.

At the time it never occurred to me that this was anything but normal. It's only with the benefit of hindsight and old video footage that I've really appreciated what a raving loon she actually was.

Our nursery was quite multicultural for the time and place (rural Kent in the late 80s) and in a way she was quite ahead of her time. Rather than do a traditional nativity she always put on a play so that no-one would feel left out. As with other teachers mentioned in these pages she also fancied herself as the new Andrew Lloyd Webber.

For instance, in my final year I was playing the part of the Big Bad Wolf in a musical version of Little Red Riding Hood. Not so odd you might think but then the multiculturalism kicked in. Instead of the woodcutter hacking me to death Mary and Joseph rocked up presumably having got lost on the way to Bethlehem. They were swiftly followed by shepherds, the three kings, and various representatives of Hannukah, Chinese New Year and Ramadam (one of the three Muslim kids explaining why he wasn't able to have Christmas dinner with us - and yes I know it's in September, I said it didn't make sense). Then with everyone gathered round Baby Jesus suddenly appeared. Getting a 4 yr old girl to simulate giving birth was presumably considered a step too far.

We then all sang a couple of original songs, no carols obviously, and sat down for Christmas dinner. However the grand finale was still to come as Santa complete with reindeer and elves burst in to wish everyone a Happy Christmas and Happy Holidays.

Absolutely barking. My Dad always said it was his favourite evening of the whole holiday.
(Milo Minderbinder, Fri 27 Mar 2009, 10:46, Reply)