Personal HygieneThere comes a point at which your hygiene becomes less your problem and more everyone else's:
My old school nurse never seemed to wash - instead she wrapped herself in crepe bandages from the first aid kits. The smell was beyond pungent. If you got ill at school, it was better to suffer than try and explain symptoms whilst only breathing out.
When she was eventually 'let go',they had to strip the wallpaper in her office to get rid of the lingering odour.
How scuzzy have you got? Or, failing that, how bad have people you know got?
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chthonic, Thu 22 Mar 2007, 12:40)
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Why it had to endEx-mrsPJM...
Although she was no shower dodger and indeed agreeably fragrant on occasion she had some downright foul personal habits.
1) Peeing in the shower. Am I alone in finding this absolutely disgusting? I'd come home after a session at the gym needing a good soak in the bath, but the knowledge that I was sat in what had become a female urinal (feurinal, feminal?) made me heave.
2) Not changing her slippers. Being female and as a result unable to control her body temperature prompted ex to invest in a pair of cartoon fluffy slippers to potter around the house in. They left no room for feet to breathe naturally and as a result would stink to high heaven within a few weeks of use. All attempts at trying to reason with her met with "Oh, but my feet get cold!" and that was that.
3) Pets. Lots and lots of bloody pets, everywhere. Now I love animals, I really do. I'm a sucker for anything cute and fluffy being a real old softy at heart. However, having to spend every Monday night scrubbing rat piss from a cage (particularly pungent) was not nice. Having found that the frozen mouse which had been placed in the airing cupboard to defrost before it met it's intended fate of being snake food had exploded and scattered stinky rodent innards all over the place also wasn't nice. A friend commented, "You have so many pets in this house, what about the smell?" I replied "Oh, they get used to it. I did".
4) Minge plucking. Okay, I'm a man of the world and know that lady-trimming is a given and to be honest I'm damn grateful for it. However, it isn't nice to be sat there on the sofa watching the wife with her legs spread tweezing away for hours at the same square cm of fluff. I can understand her reluctance to try waxing, but I don't need to be sweeping fuzz off the sofa before I sit on it.
4) "This my wife. She make much noise when she do a toilet" in the words of Borat. The same applied to mine, as the bathroom was right next to the bedroom a certain lack of decorum was understandable but at 7:45 every morning I was subjected to the sort of unholy racket that no man ought to hear. I wouldn't mind so much if no evidence of the recent movements remained, but the bowl would invariably be less than sparkling. The thought of intimate relations after that are gut churning.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2007, 10:14, Reply)
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