Rules are rules, I suppose
Up in London for job interviews, we popped into a pub for a bite of lunch. The place was practically empty, so we grabbed a table and had a drink while we looked at the menu. Once we'd decided what we were having I wandered back to the bar to order.

"Sorry mate" says the barman. "You have to order food through there". He pointed through an archway.

"Oh right" I said, setting off. As I went through the archway the barman picked up his order pad, and walked to the other end of the bar.

"What're you having then?" he asked, meeting me on the other side of the archway.

I looked at him, trying to see any hint of a smirk. He looked back impassively, biro poised. I peered past him down the length of the bar, trying to see if there were any regulars sitting there sniggering. Nope, the bar was empty. I could see my friend peering back at me from the other room, looking puzzled. I looked up at the sign above the bar: "Please order food here". O-kay.

I put in the food order and tried to join in with what I still hoped was a joke: "Can I order more drinks as well, or do I have to go to the bar for that?" I may even have made a jocular little noise to show I was in on it.

He adopted a baffled expression. "Yeah. You can order drinks." He modified his look to one that suggested he was carefully sizing up this potentially dangerous lunatic who thought you couldn't order drinks in a pub - possibly he was trying to remember where he'd left his saw, just in case - then went off down the other end to start pulling our pints.

I walked back through the archway reflecting that if I did happen to get the job I'd come down for, I'd probably want to find another pub to drink in.

And when the food eventually came, it was rubbish. I should have taken the hint that a pub in central London that's empty at lunchtime is probably empty for a reason. I like to think that the barman was a big part of it, but the cheese sandwiches probably helped.

I didn't get the job either. Oh well.
(richardm, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:16, 3 replies)

That is
great! Cheers!
( SpankyHanky, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 15:48, closed)

It's always like that in the Wetherspoons I go to
you just wait at the bar, then someone will come to serve you and you have to follow them down to the other end of the bar. I think only some tills have the function for ordering food or something.
(deadly_sinners, Mon 9 Feb 2009, 16:17, closed)

a few
places I have worked at had only one till that took food orders, but if he was writing them down on a pad it does seem more likely he was a tad simple...
(feedingtimeatthezoo day 1 of his bikini diet started, Tue 10 Feb 2009, 2:38, closed)