We're a bit busy here love
Ok, strictly speaking this takes place outside a bar but it's damn near close enough!

When I first met my current GF we got to the point where she was going to meet a few of my mates. Now, as she lives in Leeds and I live over the other side of the Pennines so it was decided that we would get a hotel in Liverpool and have a night out there (I know a few pubs and her nan is from the Wirral so it seemed like a good idea).

I decide that instead of doing some proper research I'll ask my friend Ian about a good bar for everyone to meet, somewhere that's got some music but not too loud, where you can sit and chat and the beer is reasonably priced. I must point out that Ian is a custody assistant and at the time was working in the main nick in Liverpool so I was pretty sure he'd know the trouble places.

Ian suggests the local Yates (queens square if anyone knows it) and I concur (I know, I should have said something but he works in a nick and he lives in Liverpool, he must've known what he was doing!)

We all rock up there and the only thing Ian got right was the fact that the drinks were reasonably priced! Now this is the first time that my GF had met my friends and the usual shite scouse house is blaring away so conversation is pretty much a no go.

We end up deciding to leave and head to another bar at which point we hear:

'Fucking knobead!'

and this miniature scally runs over and attempts to hit the smallest guy in our group. Fortunately our guy gets out of there and this guy decides to have a pop at the rest of us (Who thinks like that? one of him and about 5 of us, plus 3 of us were big guys!) We manage to subdue this scally (by me sitting on him basically) and wait for the plod to arrive (who were shit!).

While all this is kicking off, my ginger mate, who is about 3 feet away from it, is accosted by a couple of reps for one of the bars who proposition him in their finest Liverpool accent:

'Eh Mate, dis bar here does a free shot with every pint! Do you want to come in?'

My ginger mate just gestures behind with a thumb and simply says:

'Sorry love, we're a bit busy here'

while I'm holding this scally down and he's punching the back of my head...

Not a great first impression for my gf, made all the worse by the fact that earlier on in the night I'd told her that I'd been coming to Liverpool through Uni and for years after and had never seen any trouble...

Me and my big mouth

Apologies for length, it's been exacerbated by the sore head I have today from spending time in the pub
(Fuckarma was masturbating into your handbag, Tue 10 Feb 2009, 10:53, 1 reply)

First impressions!
I imagine your girlfriend thought she was going out with fucking Rambo! Nice work, matey!
( SpankyHanky, Tue 10 Feb 2009, 11:17, closed)