Since this thread started I've realised my whole life revolves around shit!!!
Got up this morning after a heavy night last night (if you live in Newcastle Krafty Kuts was fucking excellent at WHQ last night). I managed to drag myself to the kitchen for some recovery kornflakes and was accompanied by my lovely but foolish dog Star.

Star is a great dog - the best in fact - he looks constantly happy and he has the cutest doggy face, however, he has a fuck annoying habit of chasing the cats round the house and not doing anything with them when he catches them! Anyway, I was just about tolerating Eammon Homs sweaty fuck face on the box when I noticed Stoofer (my cat) was perching on the cat try and going cross eye'd with Star sat in front of him watching.

Still trapped in my beer/substance abuse recovery haze I sat and watched as Stoofer laid 10 cat miles of chocolate pipeline, which Star promptly ate!! FUCK! if anything will put you off food for life its seeing poo getting eaten (animal or human - see other poo related posts from me).

However Star hadn't finished, obviously thrilled with his accomplishment he then decided he'd try and shag the cat. So there he was - Stoofer stood still not understanding wot was going on as Star put his front paws around Stoofer...shot out his pink lipstick dick and began thrusting away about 2 foot in the air above Stoofer!!!

Obviously cat poo is an aphrodisiac and I had just witnessed the sickest display of sexual deviancy since Michael Barrymore (twunt)
(sorry for length - no more I promise!)
(Manatee Fondler, Fri 7 May 2004, 10:37, Reply)