Kids should damn well eat what they're given
I'm pissing sick of next door's kids. Not only do they behave like uppity little buggers, but aged 5 and 7, they've also perfected the latest eating fad in full flow.

I hear their desperately incompetent but well-meaning parents trying to shove good nutritional food - bananas, chicken, potatoes - down their whiny little throats, but these kids simply refuse. We've seen and heard tantrums, vomiting fits and some inevitable swearing from the parents, but all to no avail.

In fairness to these kids, at least the food they prefer is reasonably healthy. All they'll eat is fish. Small, simply cooked fish. And they'll scream and yell their heads off if you try to feed them anything but the fish of their choice.

It's really starting to piss me off, living next door to these nightmares. I can't bloody stand them.

Boiled sprats.
( ousgg is not seeking approval, Sat 11 Oct 2008, 12:34, 4 replies)

Yikes, those kids need a GP
If the kids are only eating fish, that's not a good sign. Children of that age often can't properly describe to adults what is wrong with them. The parents need to take the kids to see a GP.

To start the GP needs to check inside the kids mouths for topical infections, ulcers, gum disease etc. Secondly a blood test will check for allergies and thyroid problems, both of which can have big impacts on digestion and eating patterns.

If the kids have only been eating fish, they will be constipated and also vitamin deficient. A childrens multivitamin supplement and a bulking agent like Metamucil, would be a good idea, although they should consult with their GP first.

After all this, if they are still having issues, a dietitian or behavioral therapist may be able to give them some more ideas for handling tea time tantrums.

I hope all this buys you some peace ;)
(rattus, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 11:54, closed)

I
think you missed the fish based pun.

good punning btw, 10/10 would buy again.
(Hippo_of_Doom, Sun 12 Oct 2008, 15:17, closed)

gets a click
and a woo, and a yay.
(knackerz is skinning up, Tue 14 Oct 2008, 11:49, closed)

I'm sorry really
I promise, after three puns, I will post a real story next week.
( ousgg is not seeking approval, Wed 15 Oct 2008, 12:29, closed)