Unexpected. Nude. Eighty.
I am pearoasting this story purely for the fun I got out of making the pun above. And at least I got the pun out of the way at the start, so you have no 'New Ditties' to deal with later.




This is cut and paste from the old 'Housemates' QOTW:



"I was stuck for money, so moved out of my nice flat in Balham to go and become a lodger while I re-financed.

I knew her through work, so thought it wouldn't be too bad. And, in fairness, despite very quickly finding out that she was rather desparetely lonely, once I'd set some boundaries, (No, I will not watch soap operas or be having dinner with you every evening. Or any evening actually) it wasn't too painful.

Until her batty old Mum set fire to her kitchen and had to move in with us.

Suddenly the place became an asylum, the kicthen became a tip, the washing machine was never empty for me to use, there were clothes everywhere, I couldn't cope.

I'd hear strange noises and screams in the night. I'd get woken up at 4am and find all the lights on and the back door open.

I eventually decided that I had sorted out my finances enough to move on when I came home from the pub at closing time one night and found the insane old woman standing at the kitchen sink

with her knickers round her ankles.

Washing her old lady bits.

With the sponge we used for dishes"



Edit: It just dawned on me. Am I the first person on QOTW to ever get a pun and a true story at the same time?
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Sat 30 May 2009, 13:01, 2 replies)

Ewwwwwwwwww
I hope said spnge was immediatly burnt? Are are you saving it's future for another revenge QOTW?
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Sat 30 May 2009, 15:44, closed)

You could call it
A "spminge"
(Adamish Time of death, Sun 31 May 2009, 2:26, closed)