I'm Waiting
.
For someone to write a story about terrifying ghosts they, and a lot of others, saw in Northeast England the late 70's. 'Cos I have the explanation.

It was me.

As a bored teenager I frequently used to look for ways to amuse myself and one day hit on the idea of scaring drunks. Let me explain.

The route from one of the local pubs to our housing estate went past one of the old churchyards. It was a narrow path with the school on one side and the graveyard on the other. It was fairly well lit (well, it was until a .22 air rifle came out to play...) and it was the route of choice of pissed up blokes from the pub.

So one Friday night me and a mate headed for the graveyard at about 10pm. Pubs shut at 10.30 in those days and our first victims would be along soon. We stationed ourselves in the undergrowth, where we had a good view of the path and waited.

First victim staggers into view.

We waited until he was about 15 yards away and then..

snick.. A lighter bursts into flame hidden behind a headstone and we lit the methylated spirit that was now dripping down the moss covered stone. A quick scamper and...

snick.. The second stone quietly bursts into flames.

Within about a minute we had 7 or 8 gravestones quietly burning with an eerie blue flame.

Bloody drunk didn't notice a thing. He was quietly weaving his way up the path intent on getting home before falling over.

Then another group hoves into view. 4 of them and a bit more alert than the first one.

"John - what the fuck is *that*" comes from one of the group

"I don't fucking know and I don't want to find out..."

Well this noise attracted our first drunk who looked back blearily and finally noticed the graveyard, alight with an spooky blue flames..

"AHHHHH MOTHER........."

And he took off up the path like Lynford Christie on speed.

While we pissed ourselves behind a wall.


Well you had to make your own fun in those days....

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 0:57, 1 reply)

Creepy!
Wonderfully wonderfully evil. I thoroughly approve! Have a click.
(calamarain just invented dehydrated water, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 19:11, closed)