I was sick
Bad it was. Really bad,

But really watery. Like some sort of yellow gunge.

Anyway, this bout of vomitusprojectus occured whilst in bed with the then Mrs Mullered, I awoke suddenly and realised that I was going to greet the night with the Technicolour yawn and indicated to my now awake partner that fluid was en route and for her to pass me a suitable receptical.

She did, and I was.

Unfortunately, she'd passed me a wicker wastepaper bin which made the resulting fluid disperse all over my bed in the same way as water would leave a watering can with a 'rose'* attachment.

Made a fucking state of everything. Carpet, duvet, sheet, pillow and both of us.

How I laughed as I retired to the toilet to say hello to God on the big white telephone and heard Mrs M changing the bedding.

*Rose attachment, the normal attachment you get on the end of a watering can.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 7 Jan 2010, 22:45, Reply)