God almighty
Undoubtedly a repost in some cases, so bear with me, but the cases of spew related carnage seen when working behind a bar are too numerous to fully recount (or remember, was a looong time ago) -

The bloke who strolled up to the bar with his girlfriend, started ordering a round, spewed *violently* all over the (very small) bar top, wiped his gob, apologised and continued his order (while we stood, mouths agape in shock);

The 21st birthday party boy who demanded a "dirty pint" and got what he asked for - as well as boking Baileys smelling vom down the wall / himself / passers by / a fruit machine / an unwitting steward / the floor five minutes later and being ejected;

The bloke who ran through a crowded Saturday evening dance-floor to the bog, hand clamped to mouth, watery spew spraying from both sides of his clacker;

The girl who climbed the stairs to the DJ booth and let the exertion get the better of her, letting fly a technicolour yawn into the crowd below which stank of Aftershock;

The massive stewards carrying *massively* drunk students downstairs for medical assistance looking oddly like some sort of fucked up BioShock "Big Daddy & Little Sister" - except with spew all down their backs

Thinking back you were guaranteed at least one episode every evening that would be a talking point if not legend for months.


etc etc etc

EDIT : Guilty myself - namely

- Waking up with spew in very long hair (shaved head immediately)
- Spewing in own lap then falling asleep on couch
- Chundering on floor, slipping in it, landing on deck (hard)
- Throwing up in bath, forgetting about it, going through the following morning and being so disgusted I add to the already thick layer of gick

Interestingly enough, spew seems to strip the hell out of porcelain and stainless steel sinks, I'm assuming this is stomach acid? Maybe the medical bods here can shed some light?
(mymilkshakebringsallthemongstotheyard poison hearts, poison minds - joining hate, Fri 8 Jan 2010, 23:03, Reply)