My Wanking DisastersEver been caught by your mum? Or tried to fuck a pillow and got the spongey bits stuck to your bell-end creating a strange new flower? What about the time you man-milked the keyboard causing your PC to short-circuit and knocking out the mains for the whole street? Maybe you're a lady and you were using your mobile phone as a vibrator and accidentally dialed your mother? Tell us your stories and we'll tell the world.
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rob, Tue 1 Jun 2004, 17:23)
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Usual storyFrom someone I went to school with.
This guy, always getting in trouble for playing music too loud. So he gets a pair of headphones, those really posh ones that encompass the whole ear, so you hear the music perfectly, without any distractions from outside noise.
He's listening to his music, up loud as usual, and suddenly gets 'the urge'
So, he sits on his bed, faces away from the door to avoid unfortunate glances from outside, grabs a tissue from his pocket, and starts bashing away. As the moment was clearly an otherworldly experience for him, he closes his eyes, and imagines women shaking their bits at him, does his business, cleans himself up, gets up to go to the bathroom to throw the tissue down the toilet... and discovers a nice steaming mug of tea on his table, kindly deposited by his mum, whilst his eyes were closed.
It sounds almost too good to be true, but I can't imagine a 16 year old boy making that up and telling all his classmates.
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Loz I'm still here., Thu 3 Jun 2004, 19:30,
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