b3ta.com qotw
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Question of the Week » Why should you be fired from your job? » Post 86932 | Search
This is a question Why should you be fired from your job?

I spent three years "working" in the Ministry of Agriculture carefully crafting projectiles out of folded paper and drawing pins that I would then fire at colleagues with an elastic band. On discovering I'd been conducting all-out warfare when I should really have been in a field counting cows, I was asked to "reconsider my career options" outside the service.

Why, then, should you be fired from your job?

(, Thu 9 Aug 2007, 13:04)
Pages: Latest, 12, 11, 10, 9, 8, ... 1

« Go Back

For the love of god NOOOOOOOOO!
Firstly, rachelswipe - Good to have you back! I was on the verge of mounting a 'free the rachelswipe one' campaign (as well as other things) but...

...oh shit, oh shit, oh shit oh shit oh shit!!!

I also promised I wouldn't say anything about my current job...but by Tuesday leaving time I thought 'Ah fuck it'. I had a huge (even by my standards) story lined up about how I do cock-diddly all, how I blag the bosses, scam and steal etc...and just before I was going to post it - I heard a little voice behind me...


"So what's this B3ta then?"

Oh yes...my boss...the big one...THIS IS NOT A JOKE!!!ARRRRGGHHHH

He'd been watching me on B3ta ALL ARSE-BLASTING DAY!

He leans over me and clicks on the QOTW.

I.AM.DEAD.

I went soooooo red it took about 2 1/2 hours to cool down.

I instantly went into utter-bollocks-blag-mode.

"Ah well" I said, "This is a site where IT guys get together and share funny stories, etc. Of course, I'm not on it for that, I mail them and get advice on the new projects and help on resolving common IT issues"

My cheeks were on fire with shame. The word 'BUSTED' was appearing on my forehead like something out of the exorcist.

My boss looked closer. "So you wanna get fired from your job?"

OH FUCKING JESUS CHRIST FUCK BASTARD FUCK FUCK (etc but with more 'fucks') HE'S READ WHAT I'VE TYPED"

"oh ha ha hurrrgh hurrgh, of course not, it's just jokes....made up...not real at all...."

FUCK MY ARSE I AM IN TROUBLE.

Why did this have to happen on this QOTW? WHHHYYYYY?

I clicked on my 'escape' IE tab (i.e - something actually work related)and stuttered my way through some totally unconvincing gibbering cruddsville.

Through my scorching redness I carried on talking about projects etc.

He walked off.....I knew I was rough-shagged.

Yet today......not a sausage.

GET IN THERE! - what a guy!

So today I had a bit of a dabble but thought I'd best make at least a small impression that I am actually worth employing...

If I'm fired tomorrow you'll all be able to tell I was wrong about this...like I am about most things...

pray for pooflake...he may not be around for long....
(, Wed 15 Aug 2007, 23:12, Reply)

« Go Back

Pages: Latest, 12, 11, 10, 9, 8, ... 1