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I know it's short notice but would you mind staying a couple of hours longer tonight so we can get this job out?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 16:18, Reply)
fuck off, grandad
i'm already staying until 6
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 16:21, Reply)
shit's on fire yo

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 16:24, Reply)
it takes a lot to make a stew

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 16:29, Reply)
Not interested in your bowel movements, soz.

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 16:21, Reply)
yes

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 16:22, Reply)
thanks, appreciated

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 16:23, Reply)
no, soz

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 16:28, Reply)
No fucking way man.

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 16:28, Reply)
nah
I can't my hours next week too, finish at 1630hrs yo
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 16:28, Reply)
I can't your hours either

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 16:30, Reply)
I cunt your hours

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 16:31, Reply)
work it out with a pencil

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 16:28, Reply)
I've not even started yet
nd I'll probably be working later than most of you
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 16:29, Reply)
'reet?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 16:29, Reply)
None of us are actually
"working"
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 16:30, Reply)
my arm doesn't hurt as much now
thanks
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 14:01, Reply)
as much as what?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 14:01, Reply)
my toe
/gouty lol
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 14:02, Reply)
^old

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 14:03, Reply)
not as old as you
oldie
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 14:16, Reply)
is that true?
I'm 37
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 14:21, Reply)
yes, by 8 years
oldie
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 14:26, Reply)
Yeah well I'm 41

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 14:32, Reply)
deal with it

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 14:32, Reply)
it's interesting because you act like a petulant teenager and a crotchety old man in equal measure

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 14:48, Reply)
haha, wouldn't catch me doing that

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 15:01, Reply)
you act like a prick and a wanker in equal measure

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 15:16, Reply)
haha, you think I'm acting

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 15:26, Reply)
haha that's not what i mean and you know it

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 15:31, Reply)
lol soz m8

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 15:34, Reply)
:D

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 15:08, Reply)
Are we all doing our ages? I recently turned 32 which seems about average for here.

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 15:13, Reply)
no. we're not

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 15:15, Reply)
tangOLDupinblue

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 15:17, Reply)
manLOLith

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 15:20, Reply)
shurrup I'm younger than you

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 15:22, Reply)
piss off I'm only 29

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 15:23, Reply)
I'm even older than Two Hats :(

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 15:22, Reply)
I've got hats older than Two Hats

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 15:24, Reply)
You just blew my mind

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 15:48, Reply)
how many?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 16:21, Reply)
haha, I hope you die of arm cancer

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 14:08, Reply)
I hope you get psittacosis

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 15:18, Reply)
mmm, psittacios
my favourite type of nut
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 15:31, Reply)
oh good,
that's a relief
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 14:11, Reply)
no worries
happy to help
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 14:22, Reply)
okay

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 14:56, Reply)
I don't know about you, but I'm sick and tired of 5-0 running up on the block, know what I'm saying?
Try to listen to this without being sick:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=StlMdNcvCJo
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:23, Reply)

youtu.be/4Kf4kyQabwQ
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:25, Reply)
I enjoyed that a great deal

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:28, Reply)
adam buxton is a funny man

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:31, Reply)
excellent stuff

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:34, Reply)
I'm just killing time until the newsletter arrives

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:28, Reply)
haha, i get it because the newsletter never arrives!

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:31, Reply)
haha 12 inches of snow
that's pretty clever
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:28, Reply)
Yes
I also think that it's clever how much he sounds so much like a Jamaican chap, in spite of being white and Canadian.
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:29, Reply)
did you see the ukip calypso?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:32, Reply)
I sure did

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:40, Reply)
*shakes head*

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:42, Reply)
*joins in*

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:46, Reply)
are you guys dancing?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:53, Reply)
or are you human?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 14:31, Reply)
all hiphop is shit

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:29, Reply)
Grrrmachine!

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:30, Reply)
Vladiinternationalspacestation

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:32, Reply)
What else is shit., Uncle Grry?
*gathers round*
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:30, Reply)
oh christ *fetches provisions*

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:31, Reply)
Mediterranean countries, seafood, Maltesers and humanity

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:31, Reply)
although to be fair
Maltesers aren't that bad
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:32, Reply)
where do you stand on broad beans

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:33, Reply)
standing on is all they're good for

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:33, Reply)
I KNEW it, you read my suggestions and rejected them silently, when will you open your heart to the wonder of broad beans manolith

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:35, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/talk/7784003
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:37, Reply)
We've had to put up with your anti-broad bean agenda for too long
I call for a vote of no confidence in Modolith
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:42, Reply)
overruled

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:43, Reply)
I second this motion

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:43, Reply)
I don't know....he's so sound on every other point....maybe we could just ask him to not talk about broad beans too much instead? nobody's perfect

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:50, Reply)
HANG HIM

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:55, Reply)
I think it's phenomenally stupid to serve them with human liver

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:35, Reply)
that was his trouble no sense of menu planning

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:40, Reply)
also, why are rappers always pointing at things?
it really is quite rude.
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:30, Reply)
I'm with you there
And always bragging about money. It's so gauche.
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:41, Reply)
it's the language that they use that always shocks me
eff this and eff that, he's an effing mother-effer, etc.
Makes me wonder what their parents think.
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:45, Reply)
They think you're a prick

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:51, Reply)
look, I apologised to them about that misunderstanding and assured them it wouldn't happen again
some people!
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:54, Reply)
^Cliff Richard

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:54, Reply)
Word. Babylon rollin round
like they is all that..
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:30, Reply)
5-0 is a pretty good score, if you're supporting the winning team.
You can't really blame them for wanting to shout about it.
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:31, Reply)
Hawaii Five-Nil

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:58, Reply)
hahaha 'arrest him, Daniel'

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 14:01, Reply)
I like it

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:42, Reply)
I was walkin' down the street, concentratin' on truckin' right, I heard a dark voice beside of me. And I looked round in a state of fright, I saw four faces one mad, a brother from the gutter. They looked me up and down a bit and turned to each other.
I say, I don't like.....what?
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:47, Reply)
darkies

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:48, Reply)
I can't keep a straight face when I see that word.
My racist great uncle told a "monkey on the bus" joke at my nice-great-uncle's funeral wake. Very hilariously awkward silence.
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:56, Reply)
I don't suppose you're old enough to remember Battle comic
but there was a strip in it called DARKIE'S MOB

the leader of said "mob" was Sergeant Joe Darkie

who was a darkie

fanboy.frothersunite.com/DarkiesMob_Intro.html
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:59, Reply)
I remember Warlord and Commando but not Battle

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:00, Reply)
wanker

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:02, Reply)
Don't remember that one either soz

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:03, Reply)
Frank's in his early 60's, so don't feel too bad

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:02, Reply)
classic baldmonkey

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:05, Reply)
No, I am not as ancient as you.

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 14:09, Reply)
I don't like cricket

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:48, Reply)
I love it

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:40, Reply)
the Duchess of Alba's uterus

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:49, Reply)
have chips with that

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:50, Reply)
you could stuff it like a haggis

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:51, Reply)
the Duchess of Alba's uterus stuffed with kebab meat
final answer
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:51, Reply)
he's really fucking lost it this time

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:54, Reply)
Christ, I'm dizzy as fuck
/ac
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:54, Reply)
braw!

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:54, Reply)
pronouncing the final g of a wide range of verbs

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:51, Reply)
Want to form a 10cc tribute act?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:54, Reply)
will it look exactly like this or is there room for interpretation
i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--0Hu6o_mI--/x3x1nfr9zcuo7dvczu6w.jpg
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:06, Reply)
I'm going to need to speak to the wigmaster
not to mention my tailor
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:18, Reply)
alright for you, I'm going to need to speak to a surgeon

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:23, Reply)
this is going to be expensive
sod it, I'm going to be Buster Bloodvessel instead
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:28, Reply)
their name means spunk!

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:07, Reply)
Is that true?
I also heard it was am intravenous drug reference
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:21, Reply)
oh, i saw them on a list of bands named after jizz
along with pearl jam and cream
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:23, Reply)
ha lovely

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:25, Reply)
it doesn't at all, fact fans

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:28, Reply)
fuck you, what do you know?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:28, Reply)
broad beans

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:55, Reply)
Woah, wait right there
What's wrong with broad beans?
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:02, Reply)
I heard you like to push them down your wee hole with a screwdriver

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:03, Reply)
phillips?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:07, Reply)
posidrive or gtfo

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:09, Reply)
you were SUPPOSED to say
'i'm afraid i don't know who the screwdriver belongs to'
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:11, Reply)
yes but there wasn't an apostrophe you fat fucking idiot

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:13, Reply)
bit harsh

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:15, Reply)
yeah well maybe should learn how to use apostrophe's properly
                    
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:16, Reply)
it's OK, take a breath, apostrophes aren't important, or not so important that it's worth getting your knicker's in a t'wist over how people use them,

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:21, Reply)
if i'd put an apostrophe in then the screwdriver name would have been wrong you pestilent fucking dullard

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:22, Reply)
right, so it couldn't possibly be mistaken for philip's and your entire argument unravels you stupid fucking jelly

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:27, Reply)
yeah but i can't spell it both ways can i you aggravating fucking bumjob

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:31, Reply)
Just because I do it. doesn't mean I like it

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:09, Reply)
they taste awful
AWFUL, I SAY
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:07, Reply)
^ Foghorn Leghorn

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:09, Reply)
ah say, ah say, boy

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:10, Reply)
you may be cooking them too long, or maybe try them without their skins on, or mashed, broad beans are great

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:15, Reply)
oh vlad
i don't think this civil partnership is going to work out
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:33, Reply)
actual lol here

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:37, Reply)
unfinished sentences

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:14, Reply)
oooooooooooooh
Get 'er!
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 13:15, Reply)
If a picture paints a thousand words, then why can't I paint....
what?
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:37, Reply)
on tuesdays

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:37, Reply)
Hitler

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:37, Reply)
^winner

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:48, Reply)
FML :(

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:51, Reply)
list of increasingly waki nouns until it entirely stops being funny but some sad cunts still keep the joke going long after it's died

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:37, Reply)

b3ta.com/talk/7783899
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:38, Reply)
with my penis

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:38, Reply)
The Duchess of Alba

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:43, Reply)
I'm going to dig her up and wear her uterus as a hat

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:44, Reply)
cool

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:48, Reply)
BLANK

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:44, Reply)
not like a dildo spaz mong

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:44, Reply)
lolololol
alright cunty, FP2 in a bit
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:45, Reply)
lololololololol
i no rite, terrestrial telly and everyfing, marvellous
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:48, Reply)
This old man, he played one, he played knick-knack on my....
what?
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:32, Reply)
express orders

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:32, Reply)
uterus

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:33, Reply)
harpsichord

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:33, Reply)
cerebellum

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:34, Reply)
list of increasingly waki nouns until it entirely stops being funny but some sad cunts still keep the joke going long after it's died

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:34, Reply)
newsletter

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:35, Reply)
PACT coffee

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:35, Reply)
WELL bored of this thread now

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:35, Reply)
hth
www.additudemag.com/
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:36, Reply)
read the page title, lost interest, soz

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:37, Reply)
pfft

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:37, Reply)
moribund flebsite

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:36, Reply)
^winner

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:41, Reply)
I'm eating a bowl of coco pops, imagine that!
What the fuck are you doing?
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:40, Reply)
i'm not caring about your cereal adventures

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:43, Reply)
pretending to work

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:43, Reply)
you know what?
I'm not even doing that
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:43, Reply)
you're not even pretending to work?
I'm not sure how I feel about that, MONO
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:48, Reply)
I feel good about it

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:57, Reply)
though I do have an overwhelming pain in my arm and hand
I think I might be suffering with CTS
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:57, Reply)
could be a heart attach

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:00, Reply)
better than a heart detach

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:01, Reply)
well quite

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:08, Reply)
For 12 hours? doesn't seem likely.

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:17, Reply)
oh, I'm sorry MONO, I forgot you were an expert cardiologist

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:20, Reply)
might wander up to the kitchen to see if there's any of that cake left

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:44, Reply)
ah, no, soz.
Becky took the last slice
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:44, Reply)
That fat fucking slag

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:48, Reply)
what a fucking bitch

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:48, Reply)
disgusting

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:49, Reply)
down with becky

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:55, Reply)
AGAIN?!

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:00, Reply)
I will kick that bitch til she shits her uterus out

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:15, Reply)
ffs she had a double hysterectomy

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:30, Reply)
bit greedy

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:30, Reply)
correction: I will kick that bitch til she shits out of her uterus

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:32, Reply)
silently crying

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:44, Reply)
not quite silently enough, in my opinion

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:52, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=DtG5dK_HaGg
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:46, Reply)
8 minutes??
Ain't nobody got time for that
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:54, Reply)
what are you DOING here

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:56, Reply)
reading this

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:51, Reply)
what, this?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:52, Reply)
more lies

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:54, Reply)
every time you lie on the internet, god continues to not exist

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:01, Reply)

quote attributed to Abraham Lincoln
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:14, Reply)
abradolf lincler

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:16, Reply)
That's very very good indeed.

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:27, Reply)
Benitorge Mussolinington
Not as good.
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:29, Reply)
what are you DOING here

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:32, Reply)
owait I see

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:37, Reply)
Eating a chococcino muffin.
It is my second one today.
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:54, Reply)
just let rip a power-guff in the coffee area

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:56, Reply)
worst barista ever :(

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:58, Reply)
worst Fair Trade site manager ever

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:00, Reply)
Some killjoys are not happy about the stench.
I guess you could call them....

The Power-guff Churls
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:04, Reply)


(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:06, Reply)
Psst mate I think the popular page must be broken

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:12, Reply)
sorry, your post is still 2 clicks short of being poppled

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:17, Reply)
Disgusting

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:21, Reply)
Applauds

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:13, Reply)
setttin mah bitches straight yo

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:12, Reply)
Damn straight Bro

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:13, Reply)
don't make me go upside yo head

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:28, Reply)
what?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:30, Reply)
oh right, look who's here, captain fucking fun sponge, everyone stop having fun now please, captain fun sponge is here to fucking well ruin everything for everyone

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:31, Reply)
huh?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:32, Reply)
look, I'm only here today for the newsletter, just stay out of my way and I'll stay out of your way and that way there'll be no need for any unpleasantness ok

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:33, Reply)
Trying to instigate a journey to the chippy

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 12:13, Reply)
a ring a rang a dong for a hol-ee-day

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:47, Reply)
FINALLY
someone speaking some SENSE for once!
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:49, Reply)
Hey Boyce, I have a question for you
Can I employ B3ta to make my website/viral?
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:49, Reply)
I know the answer to this, and I shall tell you, if you can answer this:
Can I download the furtive bear?
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:59, Reply)
Who is the Magic Donkey?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:04, Reply)
I liked one of the answers, what should I do?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:05, Reply)
What are all these crazy slang words people are using?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:08, Reply)
How do I say "b3ta?"

It rhymes with 'moribund flebsite'
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:14, Reply)
haha
Did not expect to see the phrase 'moribund flebsite' today
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:14, Reply)
how about the phrase 'belligerent turnip'

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:23, Reply)
or 'reluctant vestibule'

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:24, Reply)
I liked their first album

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:25, Reply)
isn't that what usvsth3m is for?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:03, Reply)
Take our hilarious test to find out

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:05, Reply)
mine came back positive
:(
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:05, Reply)
Which kind of AIDS are you?
Take our OH FUCK OFF
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:08, Reply)
lol

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:08, Reply)
you'd like that wouldn't you
saying that, I'd jump ship to usvsth3m.com/talk in a heartbeat
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:05, Reply)
i bet you would, you turncoat bastard

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:38, Reply)
I'm not ashamed
or proud. Weird.
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:39, Reply)
hi, i'm a social media expert
I'd be happy to help you explore the world of social media and fire acronyms and phrases at you that have no real meaning for an extortionate fee.
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:05, Reply)
I'm insentivised by syn-ovation

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:08, Reply)
i can't do that, soz
she might be able to help:
kimgarst.com/
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:09, Reply)
not clickin that, might be a social media marketing tool, soz

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:11, Reply)

social media marketing tool moribund flebsite
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:21, Reply)
Put your arms in the air, let me hear you say

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:50, Reply)
+ 'moribund flebsite'

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:29, Reply)
Yeah!!!

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:33, Reply)
well said, monty

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:51, Reply)
sure

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:57, Reply)
Typical Rochester and Strood voter

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 11:27, Reply)
morning

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:14, Reply)
message for two hats
b3ta.com/talk/7783766
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:16, Reply)
I need to loosen some weight

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:19, Reply)
Damn, I was going to go into the office today and didn't bother

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:44, Reply)
fat fuck

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:54, Reply)
OI!

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:55, Reply)
he couldn't get it up in bed
leave him alone!
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:59, Reply)
Morning,
Can we go home yet?
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:38, Reply)
sure, why not?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:54, Reply)
*gets coat*

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:57, Reply)
I already am at home
BECAUSE I'M A FAT FUCK APPARENTLY, ISN'T THAT RIGHT MONO???
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:55, Reply)
Are you though?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:57, Reply)
Absolutely not

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:58, Reply)
he's actually terrifyingly thin
like christian bale in the machinist
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:00, Reply)
Blimey, he's put some weight on
But then I would if I was on Batman money
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:06, Reply)
can't remember if i have told you this before
but that film is #2 in my top 3 films with scary fridges
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:10, Reply)
Ooh
What's at numbers 1 and 3?
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:14, Reply)
Ghostbusters and Requiem For A Dream?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:17, Reply)
oh man, this guy
100% correct
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:21, Reply)
Indiana Jones And The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull had a fridge. I can't think of any other films with active fridges.

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:24, Reply)

www.imdb.com/title/tt0367932/
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:27, Reply)
now that's comedy!

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:29, Reply)
that wasn't a scary fridge, was it
fuck's sake, brb
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:31, Reply)
It withstood the full blast of an atomic explosion!
If that's not scary, I don't know what is
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:33, Reply)
the blast is scary, not the fridge

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:45, Reply)
still a tough old fridge
I wouldn't want to face it down a dark alley
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:46, Reply)
I thought Batman worked pro bono?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:15, Reply)
pfft
bono
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:21, Reply)
I fucking hate Bono
The deluded messianic twat
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:27, Reply)
I don't really understand why people hate Bono so much
He spends most of his time creating awareness of some of the biggest socio-political issues in the world, works for and raises a lot of money for charity...Seriously, I don't get it. What does he have to do to make people like him?
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:30, Reply)
stop looking like a cunt and saying cunty things, for a start

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:32, Reply)
Does he say cunty things?
I have to admit, I've never heard him say anything cunty. Unless you really hate starving africans, that is.
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:33, Reply)
"U2 is an original species... there are colours and feelings and emotional terrain that we occupy that is ours and ours alone."

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:45, Reply)
I said that to you in CONFIDENCE

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:50, Reply)
Pay his fucking taxes.
He's out there with scarecrow Bob telling us to dig deep, while he's not prepared to contribute to society by paying his taxes. And he's fucking proud of it.
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:34, Reply)
Is he?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:35, Reply)
Yes.
Linky
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:35, Reply)
Oh, the thing of 'moving U2' to the netherlands
To be fair, he's running a business there.
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:36, Reply)
And he should take off those
stupid fucking sunglasses
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:38, Reply)
wearing sunglasses indoors is unforgiveable

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:40, Reply)
I rest my case

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:41, Reply)
no, you're thinking of the edge

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:21, Reply)
I fucking hate the edge
The hat wearing friend of a deluded messianic twat
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:27, Reply)
He plays guitar
Nothing more, nothing less
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:31, Reply)
I know its early...3/7
www.bbc.co.uk/news/blogs-magazine-monitor-30126193
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:50, Reply)
1/7
I haven't been paying attention this week
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:05, Reply)
Same

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:05, Reply)
if anyone sees two hats, tell him to get down to the langstone canteen
there's a woman with a stall pushing some weight loss product with a sign that says "need to loose weight?"
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:15, Reply)
"Cheese"

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:17, Reply)
3, aye

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:07, Reply)
BEHOLD - THE TRICLOPS!

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:19, Reply)
morning

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 7:24, Reply)
morning
How's it going?
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 7:32, Reply)
not so bad. friday, innit.
you?
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 7:39, Reply)
aw yeah, getting there.
Off on a bushcraft course tomorrow and a job interview Monday.
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:00, Reply)
I hope you get ebola

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:01, Reply)
nah, that'd use up my sick pay in one go.

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:04, Reply)

s d
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:10, Reply)
I suppose it is Friday.

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:15, Reply)
dick friday
Private eye.
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:20, Reply)
ian hislop loves the cock

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:01, Reply)
will the bushcraft help with the interview?
also, does bushcraft just mean pubic topiary?
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:32, Reply)
alright modolith

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 7:42, Reply)
alright horriblith
what's occurring?
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 7:46, Reply)
chilling, little bit of illing

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 7:54, Reply)
just a little bit?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:48, Reply)
how do you do

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 7:43, Reply)
quite well, thank you very much
how do YOU do?
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 7:47, Reply)

I'montopofthewooooooooorld!!!
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 7:50, Reply)
the north pole?
*gasp* are you santa?
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 7:52, Reply)
More like an elf :(

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:00, Reply)
will ferrell or regular?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:33, Reply)
Hi meatsnake

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 7:55, Reply)
alright mate

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:00, Reply)
Getting out of bed in the morning is getting harder and harder

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 7:55, Reply)
stop taking heroin then

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 7:57, Reply)
Well what else am I going to do with it??

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 7:58, Reply)
plant it on your neighbour and call the police for lulz

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 7:59, Reply)
That sounds fun
Ok, I'm in
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:00, Reply)
oh whoa oh, I think you should know.

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:03, Reply)
You do?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:04, Reply)
I dont

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:11, Reply)
No, I'm not sure that I am either

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:12, Reply)
How's the lawn?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:13, Reply)
Wild and unkempt

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:18, Reply)
Like your mother

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:29, Reply)
^unkind

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:39, Reply)
you should be glad
i heard that hardness in bed can be an issue for men of your advanced years
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:34, Reply)
*grumbles*

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:39, Reply)
no, you mustn't!

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:37, Reply)
beardly greetings

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:17, Reply)
morning, dickface

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:19, Reply)
a hirsute hello to you

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:31, Reply)
morning

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:35, Reply)
morning
(don't think i'd forget you just because those two are having a spaz-off at the top of the board)
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:38, Reply)
why do they have to spoil things for everyone?

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 10:04, Reply)
good manoling

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:42, Reply)
good monstring

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:38, Reply)
yes! mod post!

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:46, Reply)
Aw, mate! Y've killed me fakkin' scooter!

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 8:55, Reply)
a rare treat

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 9:47, Reply)
Does anyone want a free kitten?
I've got one spare.
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 19:52, Reply)
in Poland?

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 19:55, Reply)
perhaps it's from
PAW-SAW
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 19:56, Reply)
Catowice

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 19:58, Reply)
Katowice, shittest airport I've ever been through
strip of fucking grass and a prefab, what a shithole
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 20:14, Reply)
the rest of the town isn't any better

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 20:17, Reply)
is it still full of mousachioed swarthy eastern european types who look like they want to steal your passport so they can smuggle their sisters into a prostitution ring in Glasgow?

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 20:20, Reply)
No, that's Glasgow

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 20:30, Reply)
or
KRAK-MEOW
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 19:58, Reply)
Pussnan

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 20:00, Reply)
put a sock in it you horrendous fishwife

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 21:39, Reply)
:)

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 22:19, Reply)
just noticed that's my quote on the stats page

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 22:21, Reply)
well it was odds on really

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 22:29, Reply)
put a sock in it you horrendous fishwife

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 22:47, Reply)
:(

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 23:13, Reply)
just noticed that's frank's quote on the stats page

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 0:13, Reply)
my wife's allergic to them
So, yes please
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 19:55, Reply)
oh hahaha

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 20:30, Reply)
Christ, you don't ever stop, do you

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 20:35, Reply)
it's funny 'cause you've got a wife!

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 0:19, Reply)
stick it up your arse

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 20:04, Reply)
ciijasiie

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 20:13, Reply)
you spelt that wrong

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 20:17, Reply)
oh ok

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 20:20, Reply)
it's

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 20:24, Reply)
fuck off mgt

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 20:32, Reply)
Dear Sir/Madam
Whilst the Council cannot compel you to take any action in respect of this matter, I write to advise you that, as a result of issues which have come to the Council's attention, I consider it appropriate that you should not allow b3ta user SpanishFly to have any access to children or young persons within your club, whether in his official capacity as a member of Cornwall Council, or otherwise. I regret that I cannot provide you with any further information at this time.
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 23:08, Reply)
awww I love the kittys

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 20:30, Reply)
take it then
it's a retard
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 20:31, Reply)
how much would it cost to post from poland?

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 21:03, Reply)
They're fucking horrible things.
Only good for the bottom of a canal.
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 21:17, Reply)
do you have any pictures of your kitten looking all cute and fluffy?

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 21:30, Reply)
cor!

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 21:32, Reply)
we should organise a charity auction for it,
every /talk poster can contribute a post and then people can bid for them. For charity.
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 22:13, Reply)
nah
bloody polish cats. coming over here, eating our whiskas
(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 0:01, Reply)
Bit ailurophobic m8

(, Fri 21 Nov 2014, 7:59, Reply)
alright

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:43, Reply)
in the juicer, friday or saink innit

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:54, Reply)
I'm about 20 minutes away

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:55, Reply)

(⊙_⊙)
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:54, Reply)
fuck off dozers

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:55, Reply)
mr.h

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:59, Reply)
rich

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 18:01, Reply)
yeah just saw a mate's new puppy, only 8 weeks old, chocolate labrador or saink
it's riddled with worms so should be safe from mods
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 18:44, Reply)
^ mates with a sexual predator

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 18:48, Reply)
I'm moving to Birmingham
Anywhere you recommend these days?
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 18:51, Reply)
Not Birmingham

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 18:55, Reply)
Georgia, I live in Dudley
Birmingham is a major improvement.
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 19:04, Reply)
What sort of place are you after?
Digbeth has some nice trendy apartments and flats, so have the canals between Brindley Place and Mail Box. Mosely has some nice houses. This is assuming you have money to burn and want to be able to ponce about with media cunts and trendy snobs.

Just check the crime rates, insurance claim rates and have a look at hs2 before you commit, oh and check the elevation especially if it's got a cellar.
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 19:17, Reply)
All dogs are stupid pricks
Fact
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 19:16, Reply)
FACT

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 19:20, Reply)
Thank you doaz

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 19:27, Reply)
FACT COPY

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 19:28, Reply)
yeah but still though

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 19:20, Reply)
Yeah fair enough

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 19:27, Reply)
Yeah, not bad The LOVELY Mr H.
alright
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 18:48, Reply)
alright stooj

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 19:04, Reply)
u ok babes?

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:42, Reply)
i AM actually, yes

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:45, Reply)
xxx

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:46, Reply)
u?

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:48, Reply)
yeh x

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:51, Reply)
phew

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:51, Reply)
sure, why not?

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:51, Reply)
xxx

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:51, Reply)
Answering questions with questions
typical jew
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:52, Reply)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
`
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:58, Reply)
rude

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:27, Reply)
no
And I definitely don't want to talk about it, alright?
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:52, Reply)
come on, babes...

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:54, Reply)
alright watkins, nice ninja edit with that comma

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:56, Reply)
he was a mod for this site once

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:01, Reply)
once is enough

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:15, Reply)

www.canwecomplain.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/uninspirational-quote-1.jpg
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:55, Reply)

deep
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:59, Reply)
My brother knocked out a hornet once
We ran when it started to come round. We figured that it'd be pretty cross about being punched in the face, and we'd been told that their stings hurt.
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:13, Reply)
Fucking hell, I wasted that sparkling anecdote on a subthread
This has got QOTW written all over it
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:18, Reply)
no no no
you're a talk man, you share your boring stories with US
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:20, Reply)
But you know pretty much all of my 'best' stories
Should I start listing my shopping trips? Mind you, there was that crazy bloke on the bus the other day. That's a thread all of its own.
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:26, Reply)
really makes you think

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:13, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/talk/7783622
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:58, Reply)
bit spiteful m8

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:14, Reply)
I'm really tired
and I think I deserve a nap
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:56, Reply)
you go for it hun

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:00, Reply)
Ok, then
Thanks
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:02, Reply)
That depends
Do you want the long version or the short version?
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:20, Reply)
tl;dr version plz

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:37, Reply)
my day...
Read Lord of the rings, the unabridged version)
it's like that but the orcs are pink and gandalf is the midget on a quest
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 18:04, Reply)
go fuck yourself

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:26, Reply)
lol j/k

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:26, Reply)
seriously though, go fuck yourself

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:26, Reply)
hahaha

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:27, Reply)
hahahaha

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:28, Reply)
haha lovely stuff!

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:28, Reply)
classic baldmonkey

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:31, Reply)
Fuck off

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 18:20, Reply)
haha

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:26, Reply)
hahahahaha

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:28, Reply)
hahaha great internetting

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:36, Reply)
Free Image of the Week: Baseball close-up

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 14:45, Reply)
oh look, a shit threadrush
/ac
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 14:47, Reply)
Oh look
a grumpy person
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 14:50, Reply)

i.imgur.com/NIpbYS5.jpg
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 14:57, Reply)
You didn't say please

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 14:59, Reply)
oh
you're funny aren't you
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 15:00, Reply)
I hadn't considered being funny
thanks for the compliment
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 15:11, Reply)
oh hahaha, pretending not to notice sarcasm
I bet you were the funniest kid in school
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 15:22, Reply)
I bet you were a prick

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 15:27, Reply)
dunno who you are, soz

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 15:31, Reply)
comment still stands

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 15:48, Reply)
ok

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 15:53, Reply)
No I was the bitter kid
Who got bullied and now takes out his anger 9nline
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 15:49, Reply)
NINENLINE!

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:23, Reply)
alright

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:28, Reply)
'alright'

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:31, Reply)

It's the best kind of online. it's 9 better
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 17:20, Reply)
For real?

(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 14:50, Reply)
i was wondering why the baseball kept getting bigger
then it hit me
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 15:00, Reply)


(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 15:22, Reply)


(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 15:30, Reply)

 
(, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 16:55, Reply)

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