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coo ee!

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 18:30, Reply)
Bit gay m8

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 18:37, Reply)
you say that like it's a bad thing

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 18:43, Reply)
7% gayness is fine, anything higher is an affront to Yahweh

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 18:45, Reply)
the tetragrammaton can suck my fucking balls

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 18:47, Reply)
He's not even in my top ten

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 18:50, Reply)
he doesn't (mini)figure in mine either

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 18:52, Reply)
I hear that after careful training it's possible to tip the box of a 10-piece set in there and a few minutes later the vehicle emerges ready assembled

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 18:59, Reply)
Just realised you're not talking about Lego, can't keep up with today's toys

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 19:10, Reply)
I remember when Lego was about making cool stuff from basic pieces rather than pissing about with shit 'action figures'.

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 19:29, Reply)
Reading this at the mo
www.amazon.co.uk/Brick-Rewrote-Innovation-Conquered-Industry/dp/1847941176
Buried deep among all the self-important management-speak bullshit (keywords: 'innovation culture') are a few gems about spectacular reinvention strategies thought up by fucking idiots
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 19:55, Reply)
eat a bag of dicks

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 19:31, Reply)
orite sleepy D
What are the haps?
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 19:44, Reply)
long weekend mate
Tomozza off. Exam next week though :'(
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 19:47, Reply)
Long weekend next week for me
Still, only one more day of work, and the F1 this weekend so it isn't all bad
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 19:52, Reply)
I'm only at work two days next week

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 19:53, Reply)
a paper round doesn't count as work

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 19:59, Reply)
Are you my boss?

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 20:01, Reply)
Oh sorry, I read 'next' as 'every'.

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 20:02, Reply)
oh baby, I can be if you want me to be

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 20:42, Reply)
smashing it up rude boy style with my home nucka MEATSniggedy
We've had a jolly nice tea
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 21:07, Reply)
Forrest Dump

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 21:33, Reply)
totally just started on 'land', I'll get back to you in about 2 hours

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 21:33, Reply)
I couldn't care less about "Camereron/Miliband Live"
But I'm sure the next cassetteboy video is gonna be great.
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 22:04, Reply)
New thread really
But you should take notice.
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 22:46, Reply)
So, yeah. Something new.
I feel like I should praise someone, again, but no one is really standing out at the moment. I can't pick Two Hats, as I'm obviously biased. Anyone you'd like to "big up", as the young people might say?
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 14:35, Reply)

people petiole
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 14:36, Reply)
nope, all a bunch of wankers

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 14:45, Reply)
vlad is one of the best ones here

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 14:47, Reply)
I don't really know him, but please feel free to elaborate.

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 14:50, Reply)
bit fruity

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 14:54, Reply)
he's a sweetheart

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 15:02, Reply)
SS express is a farking leg-end

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 14:52, Reply)
Sing his praises, meaty!
Sing them from the highest heights!
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 15:00, Reply)
Frisbee Adam gave me a novelty flying disc
So I guess he's the best one here
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 14:57, Reply)
this is getting printed, laminated and stuck on a wall as soon as he sees it
i assume you're comfortable with that
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 15:04, Reply)
It's bad enough that the disc in question is hanging on my sons bedroom wall

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 15:09, Reply)
i think you can be reasonably sure it's not a covert surveillance device

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 15:20, Reply)
Of course not
That's why he also sent a small camera
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 15:21, Reply)
Richard McBeef made me do a genuine lol, and I love electropuns, so him.
I can see vladimir becoming main event material, he's been on fire recently.

Also, I think people don't give enough credit to people like SpanishFly. He's shit but his shitness inspires greatness in others.
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 15:16, Reply)
how 'bout that doveston chap, he's a handsome fella'

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 15:22, Reply)
he died

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 15:27, Reply)
NOOOoooooooooo :'(

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 16:00, Reply)
all the more reason, surely?

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 16:04, Reply)
fair point

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 16:08, Reply)
with his trousers pressed and his shirt done up and his hair washed with some wella

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 15:33, Reply)
I think we should all post nice things about the doveston, taken from us too soon in a tragic accident that definitely wasn't his fault

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 16:10, Reply)
I liked the way he said 'morning'

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 16:10, Reply)
I like how he doesn't give a fuck

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 16:13, Reply)
I liked how he was all welsh and that

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 16:22, Reply)
really? I thought that was just an online persona

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 16:23, Reply)
either way it was well good

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 16:32, Reply)
Welsh was something that Tolkien made up.

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 17:14, Reply)
I saved MGT from deadly bum cancer, I'm definitely the best one here.

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 18:53, Reply)
Poor spacefish :(

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 19:35, Reply)
you've got my vote

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 20:11, Reply)
sorry about that, i've been really busy
here now though, tell me your problems
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:02, Reply)
I have a cold
and I just had to speak to an irritable german
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:03, Reply)
the best thing to do when speaking with a german is to continually refer to world war 2 and hitler

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:08, Reply)
I'll remember that for next time, ta

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:10, Reply)
no way
i have a cold too!
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:11, Reply)
awesome

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:12, Reply)
it's the cough that's most irritating, i find

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:15, Reply)
I ache
and my face hurts. And I don't know how much longer I can complain :(
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:20, Reply)
you poor lamb

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:44, Reply)
get bent

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:47, Reply)
well, that's the last time i try to be sympathetic!

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:53, Reply)
Come here and cuddle me, or get back to work

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:56, Reply)
i don't want to do either of those things!

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 13:03, Reply)
you could do worse than me

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 13:18, Reply)
I gazzed my problems to mongychops,
and now I have inner peace.
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:04, Reply)
i want outer peace, you selfish prick

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:09, Reply)
gaz mongy, anyway.
Who knows what miracles that man can work?
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:10, Reply)
love on the rocks, ain't no surprise, pour me a drink and I'll tell you some lies

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:05, Reply)
i don't think i could handle the truth anyway

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:10, Reply)
don't want to talk about it on here, soz

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:08, Reply)
come on, we're all friends here

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:11, Reply)
well, my legs ache a bit as do my testicles

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:16, Reply)
I'm too nice

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:10, Reply)
prove it

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:12, Reply)
I'll gaz you a dick pic

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 13:33, Reply)
I'm a bit tired, a bit hungry and a bit bored

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:11, Reply)
how about you find a new hobby?
woodwork, cars, serial killing?
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:14, Reply)
then I would be a bit tired, a bit hungry, a bit bored and a bit unable to indulge in my new hobby of killing people

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:19, Reply)
i don't have millions of pounds

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:12, Reply)

millions of pounds a proper haircut
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:15, Reply)
that's only a problem if you're an uptight square

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:15, Reply)
that bloodborne looks good

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:25, Reply)
Ebola?

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:43, Reply)
aye, it does
i won't be buying any more games until the new arkham though, i don't think
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:46, Reply)
I heard a rumour that the release date for that has pushed out to next year

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:48, Reply)
it was pushed to this year from last year then they pushed it back another 2 weeks but it should still be out in june

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:53, Reply)
Good
Why do people lie online, Manolith? What do they have to gain? What a world.
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:56, Reply)
lying on the internet has been scientifically proven to make your willy bigger

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 13:00, Reply)
Well I wouldn't need that because my willy is already massive
Whaddya know...it worked!
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 13:17, Reply)
it's either lying, or believing stuff without any credible sources
like all the people wishing death on chris evans when there was no evidence to suggest he was going to be on t*p g**r
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 13:04, Reply)
People are weird

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 13:18, Reply)
I had a haircut yesterday, averaging out the comments I have received it appears to be 'OK'

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:18, Reply)
I do hope plenty of people pointed out to you that you have had a haircut

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:19, Reply)
Yes, ranging from a simple point at and say the word 'haircut' to 'you look like a fucking hipster' which is unfair and inaccurate

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:21, Reply)
you could maybe come up with some kind of funny comeback like 'haha no I've just had my ears lowered!' or something like that

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:24, Reply)
my standard reply is 'it's the same as when I had it cut three weeks ago', it lacks the wit of your idea but gets to the point I like to think

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:26, Reply)
I can see now why it is such a noteworthy event in the lives of your colleagues and aquaintances

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:29, Reply)
You're right again, I'll get it done once a fortnight. Thanks mate.

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:31, Reply)
Three weeks?
I don't think I've seen a barber in three years.
I kid myself I'm saving money by not getting a haircut, but suspect that it's probably offset by shampoo/conditioner costs.
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:33, Reply)
Every 10 years I spend approximately £15 on a set of clippers

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:35, Reply)
I took that to mean that you only trim it once every ten years, with no hair care in between.

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:41, Reply)
I took that to mean that you only trim it once every two years, with no hair care in between.

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:42, Reply)
I took that to mean that you only trim it once every two years, with no hair care in between.

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:47, Reply)
I don't know what you and meaty are playing at.

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:52, Reply)
I don't know what you and meaty are playing at.

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:54, Reply)
i don't know what you and meaty and the doveston are playing at

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 13:12, Reply)
ECHO!

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 13:23, Reply)
I usually manage a trim once or twice a year, depending on whether anyone we know is getting married or not

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:36, Reply)
I had long beautiful hair until the 6th December 2009. I still haven't got used to the frequency a short hairstyle needs to be maintained to look funky fresh and fly.

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:38, Reply)
I don't think I wiped properly

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:37, Reply)

5.9.83.79/talk/7808872
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:46, Reply)
I am currently suffering from adrenal fatigue
which could last 18 months - and let me tell you it isnt fun.
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:50, Reply)
will it affect your ability to post on the internet?

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:54, Reply)
Its already starting to.

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:55, Reply)
What does this mean?
Do you become calmer and less likely to fight or flee?

Because I can see that working out well for you, brah.
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 13:15, Reply)
I don't blame you The Doveston, I blame society

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 14:16, Reply)
morning

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 7:40, Reply)
Can you believe that California Man was 23 years ago?
That being said, you're younger than me aren't you. How old were you in '92?
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 7:46, Reply)
or 'Encino Man' as our american cousins would know it

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 7:48, Reply)
92 was a cracking year

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:11, Reply)
I was a mere 15 year old slip of a thing

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:13, Reply)
I was 18
It seems a very long time ago
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:25, Reply)
My sister was born the year I left school
Every time her birthday rolls around it reminds me how old I am. More so than my own birthday, for some reason.
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:30, Reply)
haha you are pretty old, aren't you?

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 10:50, Reply)
I'm venerable as fuck m8

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 10:54, Reply)

www.cracked.com/blog/9-recipes-from-saddest-cookbook-ever-tested/
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:16, Reply)
Haha, that was lovely

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:30, Reply)
i liked this line
"To simulate the taste, boil a lump of meat in saltless water for a few hours, then dry it out and season it with the screams of the cow's ghost"
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:39, Reply)
Brilliant
I gave my cousin a microwave when he got his first place. He said "I'm going to cook EVERYTHING in this".
I said "tell me that's not true, or I'm taking the fucking thing back"
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:55, Reply)
I was expecting a joke about British cuisine, when I read that.

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:05, Reply)
i was 6

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:13, Reply)
haha, only pricks are 6

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:21, Reply)
and you say/said that to your kids, yes?

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:24, Reply)
all the time

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:25, Reply)
well that's alright then
it was the hypocrisy that bothered me
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 10:40, Reply)
I showed them the picture of Jesse Eisenberg as Lex Luthor and asked them if they thought I would make a good Lex
They both said "Nah, Kingpin maybe"

Pricks
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 10:55, Reply)
he's a decent actor. it's the director i don't necessarily trust
he did a decent job with watchmen though so who knows!
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:09, Reply)
watch men you say, film about watches?

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:10, Reply)
You're thinking off Face/Off

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:15, Reply)
A Mighty Wind

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:28, Reply)
Straptain America

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:28, Reply)
Timex-men

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:35, Reply)
trollex hunter

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:38, Reply)
Seiko (Psycho)

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:42, Reply)
swatcher in the woods

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:46, Reply)
Hands Christian Anderson

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:54, Reply)
Bezeljuice

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:56, Reply)
Swiss Congeniality

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:58, Reply)
when the hublots

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 12:01, Reply)
nah, gay voyuerism

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:15, Reply)
I should of guessed really

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:32, Reply)
Your argument is invalid because Ben Affleck

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:16, Reply)
yeah, i do hate me some ben affleck
but then there have been loads of casting decisions in films that seemed mad on paper. battfleck will be the toughest test though
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:17, Reply)
For me it's Adam West or nothing

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:59, Reply)
Turning Watchmen into a film was a mistake.
Letting Snyder direct it was malicious.
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 11:59, Reply)
Quite frankly I'm surprised he doesn't get bullied more on this forum.

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:28, Reply)
I was 10
I love it when we do a 'how old everyone is' thread.
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:16, Reply)
You would, pervert

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:21, Reply)
this is a 'how old everyone was' thread, you'll have to extrapolate to get full enjoyment from this one

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:24, Reply)
I was 1 million

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:19, Reply)
Well you look well for it

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:21, Reply)
been working out innit

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:21, Reply)
in what?

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:37, Reply)

i.imgur.com/tHxwK.gif
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:40, Reply)

stream1.gifsoup.com/view1/4389572/0891-50-50-50-o.gif
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:44, Reply)
Which Homosexual Stereotype Are You? Take Our Online Quiz To Find Out!

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:45, Reply)
I got 'Effeminate Skinny Man'!
Find out your results!
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:47, Reply)
I got "bottom bitch"

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:48, Reply)
I'd be the lab coat guy

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:59, Reply)
a leotard and leg warmers

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:42, Reply)
also, alright glovers?

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:42, Reply)
yeah dude, you?

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:44, Reply)
yes m8te, ive never been better. although id quite like a pint, like, now.

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:46, Reply)
Go for it!

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:49, Reply)
bit early innit, maybe at lunchtime eh? if i can hang on for three hours

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:52, Reply)
I think it's acceptable to drink from the moment a wetherspoons pub sells alcohol...thats normal right?

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 10:00, Reply)
if it wasn't they wouldn't start selling then, im happy to let wetherspoons dictate the acceptable drinking hours

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 10:04, Reply)
exactly...government approved

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 10:17, Reply)
you can't say that word!
he's "differently leo'd"
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:46, Reply)
thats easy for you to sayer

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:52, Reply)
ha

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 10:00, Reply)
14
What's the prize winning number?
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 10:15, Reply)
Gazungas!

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:16, Reply)
Long over due a remake I reckon

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:17, Reply)
No need to mess with the classics.
Unless they remake it as a Clarkson biopic.
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:22, Reply)
Two socially awkward teens find Jeremy Clarkson frozen in ice
then proceed to thaw him out and pass him off as a streetwise teen? There's nothing about that premise that I don't like.
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:24, Reply)
Hammond and May as the teens, using that digital de-aging technique that was so successful on Patrick Stewart for the later X-Men films?
The audience is ready made, for this. Are we going to be rich, 2Hats?
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:33, Reply)
Oh, we'll be rich
Richer than ASTRONAUTS
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:36, Reply)
And the t-shirt people refunded my money, which was very kind of them
I know Tangled will have been worrying about that.
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:00, Reply)
oh that's a load off my mind

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:48, Reply)
It was touch and go for a while there

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:09, Reply)
ah, the Spanishfly technique to noncing

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:29, Reply)
The sex offenders 'smash & grab' as it were

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:37, Reply)
he calls it the "kid diddle skidaddle"

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:39, Reply)
that's fun to say
Like a sinister Dr Seuss
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:40, Reply)
he's a tad sinister anyway in all fairness
who doesn't like green eggs and ham?
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:47, Reply)
Not Sam-I-Am, that's for sure

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 10:01, Reply)
Chilling with my Aunty and uncle in bel air

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:05, Reply)
Poomanji

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:10, Reply)
Sorry, I meant morning

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:11, Reply)
I could murder a chelsea bun, Boyce
It's too wet outside to justify going to the shops for one, and making them takes ages. What a dilemma.
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:19, Reply)
I'm ready for NEW SUN-PAT RICH ROAST on toast.

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:26, Reply)
Peanut butter on toast?? You maniac!

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:27, Reply)
it's what built America

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:42, Reply)
that and paddies

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:42, Reply)
and they've got the little chinese fellas to thank for those railroads

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:13, Reply)
'ning!
Dodgeball tournament, tonight.
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:17, Reply)
spectator or participant?

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:14, Reply)
Participant.
Not got a unitard, though.
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 10:05, Reply)
you can't say that... etc

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 10:08, Reply)
Doveston, oh Doveston, I still hear your sea winds blowin'
I still see her dark eyes glowin'
She was 21, when I left Doveston
(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:33, Reply)
I'm afraid to say that the doveston also died in the accident

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:49, Reply)
he doesn't seem terribly committed to this story

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:14, Reply)
alright

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 8:58, Reply)
Good morning

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:00, Reply)
Weeta, Poo and Bum too!

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:13, Reply)
Dead poo-ets society

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:30, Reply)
morning d

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:13, Reply)
all you need is your own imagination so use it that's what it's for

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:26, Reply)
yes

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:29, Reply)
hi!

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:31, Reply)
aight Dick McB3fan?

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:36, Reply)
yes thanks u?

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:42, Reply)
I'm going steady mate...just given myself a payrise :D

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 9:45, Reply)
can I have one too?

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 10:19, Reply)
sure thing mate. but first you have to perfect the art of never answering your phone, thus giving the illusion to your boss that you are super busy all the time

(, Thu 26 Mar 2015, 10:28, Reply)
you know who you never see in films anymore, brendan fraser
he dead or something?
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:24, Reply)
blast from the arse

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:25, Reply)
George of the bumhole

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:26, Reply)
The bummy

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:27, Reply)
the scorpion's ring

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:47, Reply)
diary of a chamber pot

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:29, Reply)
the thomas brown affair

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:42, Reply)
Breakdance Poo: Electric Poo-da-loo

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:47, Reply)
a stool in mr magic's pond

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:50, Reply)
captain crapp

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:51, Reply)
world arse wreckin' poo

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:53, Reply)
cold flush brothers

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:54, Reply)
business markie

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:56, Reply)
stool g rap

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:57, Reply)
poo tang clan

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:58, Reply)
the crap band

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:59, Reply)
shit
le freak
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:00, Reply)
le faec

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:01, Reply)
farley 'cackmaster' funk

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:07, Reply)
bum direction

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:12, Reply)
jobbie brown

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:03, Reply)
stoolly d

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:00, Reply)
stool and the gang

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:05, Reply)
sorry I meant Skid Markie

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:02, Reply)
you plopped a bomb on me

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:13, Reply)
ring of shite water

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:15, Reply)
here come de hotshitter

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:16, Reply)
Everything I poo, I poo it for you

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:18, Reply)
Once upon a time I was falling in love, but now I'm only falling apart.
It's really hard to poo, total prolapse of the arse
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:19, Reply)
ruiner
and don't think I didn't see your deletion
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:19, Reply)
I take it you have Richard mcbeef on ignore then

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:22, Reply)
chris 'rrhoea

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:23, Reply)
clearly not as I replied to him above

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:25, Reply)
piss urea

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:27, Reply)
chris rear

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:22, Reply)
electric 'ave a poo

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:15, Reply)
baby bum crack

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:15, Reply)
shitty maclean

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:19, Reply)
job marley and the wailers

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:26, Reply)
harry j allstars: liquidator

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:28, Reply)
shat in mi kitchen

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:32, Reply)
ubend40

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:33, Reply)
burning rear

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:34, Reply)
ring crosby

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:36, Reply)
dean shartin'

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:37, Reply)
lee scratch anus

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:36, Reply)
Avril latrine

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:15, Reply)
khazi chiefs

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:16, Reply)
wee papa girl crappers

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:17, Reply)
turd world

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:17, Reply)
the brownload festival

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:18, Reply)
jobby cash

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:20, Reply)
fake splat

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:28, Reply)
house of strain

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:33, Reply)
dumpy's rusty nuts

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:34, Reply)
brown shites affair

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:34, Reply)
splashing bum skins

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:36, Reply)
west coast ploplock

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:41, Reply)
poo tag clan
edit: doh! rick arse lick
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:42, Reply)
ain't nuthin to wipe with

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:45, Reply)
supercrappin'

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:44, Reply)
danny turd pooper sized

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:45, Reply)
bounce, rock, strain, flush

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:47, Reply)
average wipe band

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:50, Reply)
everything but the curl

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:52, Reply)
Diarrh Straits
Sultanas of Swing
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:51, Reply)
U2

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:53, Reply)
coil

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:55, Reply)
coldplay

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 23:56, Reply)
What's for binner?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 18:59, Reply)
bizza

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:02, Reply)
How's the bum cancer?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:30, Reply)
dunno yet,
they're counting my blood at the moment, and i've got some bits of card i'm supposed to spread my poo on so they can look at it. only i've not had a poo yet since i got them.

but thank you for asking.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:31, Reply)
cor
keep drinking lots and eat some fruit
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:34, Reply)
faecal occult bloods are a pretty useless test for bowel cancer in symptomatic younger people.
Just saying
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:35, Reply)
oh.
hm. what should they be doing instead, then?
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:36, Reply)
shit in a bin

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:37, Reply)
Sending a miniaturized man in an equally miniaturized high-tech submarine up your bumhole to find out what's going on, I guess.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:38, Reply)
So he can - wait for it -
carry out a reccy.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:39, Reply)
...and immediately mr tea manages to sort out the films issue...well done mr tea

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:41, Reply)
full blood count is a good start so I agree with that, plus they'll probably check your ferritin levels.
If bloods are normal but dark poos persist they might refer you directly for colonoscopy or get you to see a colorectal surgeon or gastroenterologist. If it's likely there is bleeding then they have to work out where it's coming from, which could be anywhere from the oesophagus onwards.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:41, Reply)
but if dark poos don't have blood in, what does that mean or not mean?
and what if my poo just goes normal again?
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:44, Reply)
Then you're probably fine.
Lower bleeds tend to cause fresh blood in stools whereas something like a bleeding stomach ulcer or oesophageal varices cause black tarry stools due to the blood being altered by stomach acid etc. But then there is plenty of other stuff that can make stools black, such as dietary changes and idiots who forget they're taking iron tablets. I'm sure you'll be fine.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:49, Reply)
i did eat a squirrel pie on Saturday,
can squirrels turn your shit black?
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:52, Reply)
I've never eaten squirrels so I wouldn't know.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:59, Reply)
would a stomach ulcer explain
why i can no longer eat beans without instantly getting heartburn?
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:53, Reply)
Possibly. Severe heartburn and black tarry stools probably means you get a gastrostoscopy.
Lucky you.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:58, Reply)
i wouldn't say they were tarry, particularly.
not like a Guinness poo.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:04, Reply)
my shit goes darker if i forget to drink my requisite 2 litres a day

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:56, Reply)
i had definitely drank 2 litres the previous day,
granted it wasn't just water mind you
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:57, Reply)
are you going to answer the lego question or just leave everyone in suspense

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:59, Reply)
too much liquorice

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:01, Reply)
I should imagine having a ferretin your bumhole would cause some bleeding

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:44, Reply)
MGT this is what this forum has been waiting for
it brings together absolutely all of our interests
poo
measuring things
doctors
bum doctors
health scares
over-sharing
possibility of new icons
what we had for dinner
did I mention poo
it's got the lot. no film titles but I am sure we can find a way. it even features bins as hopefully somebody will be throwing the samples away after checking? anyway what I am saying is well done on synthesising such a broad range of issues into one thing and I hope that knowing you've achieved the near-impossible is some consolation to you at this difficult time
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:40, Reply)
Das Poop

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:41, Reply)
\o/

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:43, Reply)
Nutty Shit II: the dumps

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:45, Reply)
did you ever swallow lego as a child?
I just added lego to the mix, vlad.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:47, Reply)
mind. blown.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:48, Reply)
no,
i did once sit on a Weeble though.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:00, Reply)
a likely story

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:03, Reply)
Stop! Or my bum will poo

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:40, Reply)
I know what poo shit arse bumhole.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:44, Reply)
stool hand luke

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:46, Reply)
crapped in corelli's mandolin

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:47, Reply)
ha!

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:48, Reply)
lol

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:48, Reply)
sin shitty

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:11, Reply)
Batman Rectums
The Dark Shite
The Dark Shite Rises
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:00, Reply)
Mission colon Impossible

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:48, Reply)
The Secret Diarrhoea of Adrian's Hole

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:54, Reply)
Turdman of Alcatraz

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:55, Reply)
The Fissure King

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:56, Reply)
Fistula Untold

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:57, Reply)
stoma loan

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:10, Reply)
I've waited hours for this
I've made myself so sick
I wish I'd stayed asleep today
I never thought that this day would end
I never thought that tonight could ever be
This colostomy
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:26, Reply)
Colon the Bumbarian

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:28, Reply)
crack to the suture

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:31, Reply)

seoulhash.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/Assablanca.jpg
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:38, Reply)

www.glastonbridge.co.uk/amy/old/bottom-gun.jpg
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:42, Reply)
the legend of bagger vance

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:29, Reply)
bum pooed over the cuckoo's nest

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:39, Reply)

n ch
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:48, Reply)
colostomy myself and irene

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:27, Reply)
colostomy in translation

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:29, Reply)
7 years in toilet

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:32, Reply)
bum like shit bot

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:33, Reply)
the bucket shit

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:37, Reply)
Star Wars Epoosode IV: A Poo Hope

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:41, Reply)
Star Trek: The Motion Picture

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:42, Reply)
Poonapple Express

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:44, Reply)
The Shit Hikers Guide To The Galaxy

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:48, Reply)
'Captain's log... '

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:52, Reply)
Scotty, bum us up

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:55, Reply)

Sc b
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:58, Reply)
Starfish Wars Episode VI: Rectum of the Jedi

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:43, Reply)
Metropoolis
Le Voyage Dans la Bum
Brave Poo World
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:48, Reply)
Mr Poopers Penguins

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:54, Reply)
The Bum Pooer Shites Black

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:43, Reply)
The Black Hole

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:46, Reply)
Moon

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:48, Reply)
Turder and Poop

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:48, Reply)
One Poo Over The Poo Poos Nest

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:49, Reply)
Baby's Armageddon

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:51, Reply)
Pans Analrinse

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:52, Reply)
Bum and Bummer

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:53, Reply)
Ground Log Day

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:55, Reply)
High Stool Musical

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:57, Reply)
Stool Of Rock

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:01, Reply)
Planet of the Arsegrapes

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:40, Reply)
Shite Club

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:56, Reply)
Pants Lavatories

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:54, Reply)
Harry Plopper and the Chamber Pot of Shitlets

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:39, Reply)
this one made me laugh the most
well done
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:48, Reply)
high stool poosical
💩
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:56, Reply)
faeces-off

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:58, Reply)
Robocrap

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:58, Reply)
Robocrap Poo

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:59, Reply)
Shitler's List

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:03, Reply)
He's just not that into poo

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:13, Reply)
Ten things I hate about poo

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:15, Reply)
Turdinator Poo: Fudgement day

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:00, Reply)
Turdinator Pee: Rise of the latrines

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:02, Reply)
Ailingbums VS Turdinator: Requibum

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:03, Reply)
Pooranha

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:06, Reply)
Logan's Runs

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:34, Reply)
poo fast poo furious

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:59, Reply)
crapped in america

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:02, Reply)
the colour of dunny

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:03, Reply)
Crapped In America: A Sphincter Soldier

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:05, Reply)
jackie brown

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:06, Reply)
Poop fiction

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:08, Reply)
The poonies

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:09, Reply)
reservoir logs

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:11, Reply)
the shart of war

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:13, Reply)
shitty woman

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:16, Reply)
poo gentlemen of verona

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:18, Reply)
Pooperman

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:20, Reply)
Fifty shits of grey

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:23, Reply)
Senna

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 22:27, Reply)
best /talk ever

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 21:01, Reply)
binned sweetcorn

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:05, Reply)
bince

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:09, Reply)
Bin with pasta

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:09, Reply)
I had a KFC mega box
I've noticed they've started saying how many calories are in their food. There's 27,595 in a mega box.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:12, Reply)
<s>everything on the second line</s> "it's binger lickin' good"

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:20, Reply)
binger tower meal

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:21, Reply)
I prefer Binger King
although their chips are rubbish
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:26, Reply)
You know what I never see anymore?
Binpys, whatever happened to them?
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:29, Reply)
They're still going
www.wimpy.uk.com/
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:36, Reply)
Are you a Big Binder Biter?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:38, Reply)
I did like a binder in a bun, but the bin derbys were my fav

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:43, Reply)
Thanks for your help, tonight, mongy.
When do I get my "mongy didn't fix it for me" badge?
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:59, Reply)
when you stop being a faggot

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:02, Reply)
Wow, they've cleaned their image up
When I went as a kid the burger was square, looked like lorne sausage
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:00, Reply)
that was bindeys

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:01, Reply)
binestrone soup

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:15, Reply)
bindaloo

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:21, Reply)
mushy beas

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:30, Reply)
coq au bin

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:37, Reply)
binda bcartney bausages

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:41, Reply)
Everything
I'm binging.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:47, Reply)
pfft

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:30, Reply)
sausage, egg, chips and bins

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 19:55, Reply)
I would like to declare my affection for this whole thread and every contributor to it

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:09, Reply)
coq au bin

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:13, Reply)
guyrim

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:15, Reply)
guybin

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:34, Reply)
onion binjis

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:27, Reply)
BIN DAE DUK

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:29, Reply)
eggs binedict

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:30, Reply)
a bin of baked bins

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:31, Reply)
binestrone soup
oh shit that one's gone already. k...

stuffed potato bins
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:32, Reply)
bin done

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 20:38, Reply)
Lunchtime has passed without a food thread.
Well done, everyone.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 14:07, Reply)
a sandwich, some fruit and a bag of crisps as a treat

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 14:10, Reply)
My office is awash with chocolate and sweets, so I've just brought some peanuts, for savoury contrast.
Had a Sherbet Fountain, yesterday, which gave me a headache.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 14:13, Reply)
That wasn't sherbet.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 15:33, Reply)
That wasn't yesterday

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 15:50, Reply)
that wasn't a headache

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 15:59, Reply)
Well, my mind is blown.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:05, Reply)
that wasn't your... etc

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:05, Reply)
You ARE propositioning me!

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:16, Reply)
you wish, buddy

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:20, Reply)
Everyone wishes.
Our hair would entwine, and it would be glorious to behold.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:28, Reply)
I've not had a lunch yet.
I plan to eat fruit and eggs.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 14:17, Reply)
bindhi bhaji

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 15:07, Reply)
I had some crackers with artsy fartsy chilli chedder.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 14:16, Reply)
braw!

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 14:22, Reply)
Which DC Thomson character are you?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 14:26, Reply)
The People's Friend

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 14:31, Reply)
DUNNIS THA MUNNIS

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 15:49, Reply)
itt: wankers from often topics talk about foood

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 14:39, Reply)
Sossy sammich lol

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 14:44, Reply)
and clarkson has been sacked
what a day this is turning out to be
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 15:49, Reply)
It's all go, isn't it!
It's a shame for the show, because I enjoyed it. It was pretty much the only british made show I watched. That doesn't justify him bullying a member of staff though.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 15:51, Reply)
he will always be the real life Alan Partridge to me.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 15:56, Reply)
i liked the big adventure episodes
but the general tone of the show was a bit irritating.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 15:59, Reply)
The missions were always the best thing about it
but there we are. All done now. Even if they do replace him/them, I can't imagine it'd last long. They'll probably sell it to Sky or summat.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:00, Reply)
yeah, it'll end up on sky or if they're really unlucky, channel 5

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:05, Reply)
They've got Fifth Gear
Or they used to. Which funnily enough was made up of former Top Gear people.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:13, Reply)
Wasn't Fifth Gear just how Top Gear was before it stopped being about cars and became The Midlife Crisis Showcase?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:19, Reply)
Like everything on 5, it wasn't as good as its bbc counterpart

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:21, Reply)
CSI is immeasurably superior to Waking The Dead.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:26, Reply)
I don't know what either of those things are

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:29, Reply)
I bet you don't even own a TV.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:35, Reply)
I lease with an option to buy

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:37, Reply)
Is that all a thing, for televisions?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:43, Reply)
+n

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:31, Reply)
disgusting

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:38, Reply)
what's disgusting about 'waking then dead'?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:43, Reply)
you monkey

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:45, Reply)
I heard that they want to bring in Chris Evans,
which makes perfect sense, in that he's an irritating prick with an inexplicably successful media career.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:06, Reply)
and Roy Walker from catchphrase

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:14, Reply)
If Chris Evans gets the job I shall eat my tv and poop it out on the doorstep of television centre

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:14, Reply)
Wait, ginger Chris Evans or Captain America Chris Evans?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:14, Reply)
The former, I presume.
If they got the latter to do the whole thing in character (preferably as Johnny Storm), I'd start watching it.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:17, Reply)
an amalgamation of both

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:18, Reply)
may god have mercy on us all

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:20, Reply)
evans has denied it strenuously
i liked the petition to have alan partridge replace him. not steve coogan, partridge
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:19, Reply)
Stephen Fry would be good
but (for better or worse) it would really change the vibe of the show
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:22, Reply)
Unless you don't like Stephen Fry, which is possible I suppose

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:23, Reply)
If Steven Fry could reenact that crash that Richard Hammond had, I'd watch.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:27, Reply)
WELL I LIKE HIM

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:29, Reply)
He's an irritating prick with an inexplicably successful media career.
I was indifferent to him, until QI, whereupon he became insufferably smug and convinced people he was clever.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:32, Reply)
Well he is pretty clever, to be fair
And I think it's his acting and writing skill that's made him a success.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:36, Reply)
He's well educated, yes, and been in plenty of good stuff (well, Blackadder), but I've never really warmed to him,
and QI is so terribly, terribly shit, that I've become upset about it. On the internet.

I feel like I need someone to blame.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:42, Reply)
have you tried gazzing mongychops?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:44, Reply)
Good idea.
I feel better already.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:51, Reply)
Again, I respectfully disagree
QI is the other british show I watch. But I hope this difference in opinion doesn't have any effect on our blossoming romance.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:44, Reply)
Opposites attract, 2Hats.
I am worried that manolith will get jealous, though.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:46, Reply)
i'd welcome you taking him off my hands for a while, tbh

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:57, Reply)
Everything's coming up monster munch!
I should probably rephrase that.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 17:00, Reply)
I should state that I have never been on your hands

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 17:00, Reply)
well this is an embarrassing way to find that out

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 17:39, Reply)
it's ok, two hats
i like him too
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:37, Reply)
Yeah, that's right, gang up on me.
I'm never allowed to be in the right, on this website.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:44, Reply)
i was fully behind you on the whole manolith appreciation day thing

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:46, Reply)
I cling to those small triumphs.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:54, Reply)
^gay

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 18:49, Reply)
I really hoped when the story broke he'd punch rnuk, mind you wouldn't get sacked for that

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:23, Reply)
maybe next time

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:54, Reply)
worst day ever.
IN THE WORLD!
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 18:11, Reply)
Fresh from Twitter:
"Samantha ‏@ImAweSamantha 12 minutes ago
Top Gear made me who I am today. That's never going to change."
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:43, Reply)
Was she conceived at the moment a caravan exploded?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:45, Reply)
ha, possibly
Some of the knuckle headed comments are quite comical. Sadly there are some people who don't seem to mind that Clarkson physically and verbally abused someone.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:46, Reply)
good grief

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:45, Reply)

Melissa Reeves ‏@DJMelReeves 1 hour ago
It's official I'm never watching top gear again ✋ it's like when Charlie sheen left two & a half men.... He can never be replaced
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:50, Reply)
Christ, get this guy....I bet he's a barrel of laughs
Tom Doyle ‏@Tomas_Doyle 1 hour ago
Top Gear's greatest trick was convincing the wailing right wing masses that they are an oppressed minority of noble rebels.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:51, Reply)
Huh??
Gerry McBride ‏@GerryMcBride 2 hours ago
remember when top gear was a tv show about cars and not a cultural cornerstone for which people would gladly lay their lives on the ground
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:55, Reply)
Bring back Tiff Needel!

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:57, Reply)
he does 5th Gear now

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 18:34, Reply)
I thought that was Nigel Farij's job.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:56, Reply)

upsetaboutclarkson.tumblr.com/
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 16:56, Reply)
Ok, that was making me cross so I stopped reading
People are fucking horrible. How many of them would get away with punching a co worker? Idiots.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 17:00, Reply)
this is exactly why he thinks he can get away with it
it makes me wonder where they think the line is. what if he'd broken a bone, or sutin?
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 17:36, Reply)
Clarkson was well within his rights to kill that other guy, with a name like that he was probably an Arab or something else equally subhuman

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 18:02, Reply)
Well, that validates my "the Great British public are morons" theory.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 17:05, Reply)
I like it when Mel eats all the cake.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 18:54, Reply)
Here is a new thread, to liven up this dying messageboard.
There's diet chat on Off Topic, and QOTW has hardly taken off - surely the redoubtable /talk can do better?
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 11:55, Reply)
I've spent two days trying to photograph a hole that has appeared in the shoulder of a t-shirt
and it's starting to make me go peculiar
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 11:57, Reply)
And let me guess (re: dietchat on /ot)
Is Swipe CORRECT and everyone else utterly wrong and stupid and men?
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 11:57, Reply)
it's worse than that, chompy is giving guidance on calorie counting

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:00, Reply)
of course he is

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:02, Reply)
why are you trying to photograph a hole in a shirt and why is it taking so long?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:04, Reply)
I bought a t-shirt online and it arrived with a hole in it
I'm not going to send it back or asking for a refund (I can sew a fucking hole up) I just wanted to make the company aware of it. Naturally, if they offer something in the way of recompense, I shall humbley accept.
They keep coming back saying "the photo isn't clear". If these ones aren't clear enough, I'm giving up.

tl;dr - First world problems.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:07, Reply)
it's not one of the arm holes is it?
those are supposed to be there
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:08, Reply)
you're not helping

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:14, Reply)
what is on the tshirt?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:23, Reply)
yesterday's dinner

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:27, Reply)
probably, the frightful slob

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:37, Reply)
I wasn't MY dinner though
that's the worst thing
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:37, Reply)
your mum

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:28, Reply)
a picture of her or just those words?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:36, Reply)
her juices

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:40, Reply)
disgusting

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:42, Reply)
poke something through the hole in the picture

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:12, Reply)
In the first one I poked my fingers through it
this was, apparently, too much for the american brain to grasp
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:15, Reply)
just send it back
/racist
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:16, Reply)
It'll cost me more to send it back than the bloody thing's worth, I'm sure of it
Also, it's cool and I want to keep it
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:18, Reply)
it's the logo for an obscure guitar manufacturer, isn't it?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:21, Reply)
No
but that is the sort of thing I would buy, you're right
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:23, Reply)
i bet it is and all

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:24, Reply)
It's an advert for Verger Pig Farms
which is a vaguely obscure reference to Hannibal Lecter.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:25, Reply)
what kind of self-respecting adult wears tshirts with stuff on them
pathetic
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:29, Reply)
I know
I should grow up and that
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:29, Reply)
yeah right "something"

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:17, Reply)
how many calories are in a paperclip anyway?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:08, Reply)
all the threads there are foood related

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:00, Reply)
gonz did a poooo related thread earlier

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:01, Reply)
Now we're talking

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:02, Reply)
let's talk about sex, baby
let's talk about you and me
let's talk about all the good things and the bad things that may be
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:07, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=kZzBd41NuZw
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:15, Reply)
i like the top comment on the video
"You know you've made it when your song makes people think of two retards and a dog van"
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:18, Reply)
lol

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:24, Reply)

youtu.be/w0N4twV28Mw
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:24, Reply)
I see your hotstepper
and raise you a....

www.youtube.com/watch?v=StlMdNcvCJo
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:26, Reply)
nice, i was just listening to baby come back but informer was next on the list

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:28, Reply)
Bye bye b-b-bye bye....b-b-bye bye bye bye

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:29, Reply)
i must admit
i was a clown
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:36, Reply)
These are some lyrics that I always found creepy, from Sweat by Shaka Demus & Pliers
"Girl, I'm gonna make you sweat, sweat 'til you can't sweat no more. And if you cry, I'm gonna push it some more"

I think Shaka Demus and /or Pliers were rapists.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:39, Reply)
Wasn't that Inner Circle?
Struck me as more than a little rapey, too.

Positive spin: the sex is consensual, but his cock is so big that she's unable to enjoy herself. That's better, but not by much.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:51, Reply)
Was it?
Well then I owe Messrs Demus and Pliers an apology
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:57, Reply)
I think the war has already started

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 13:04, Reply)
I remember teenage me tossing himself off to the picture on the inside of the Tease Me album.
I seem to recall that the girl had a mighty punani, but a face like a man. A quick Google is getting me nowhere, which is probably a good thing.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 13:09, Reply)
good heavens

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 13:27, Reply)
have you found yourself drawn to man-faced, vaginally-endowed women ever since?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 13:49, Reply)
Are you propositioning me?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 14:15, Reply)

sex poo
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 13:13, Reply)
some knob dun a thread about books, like anyone reads anymore, rubbish

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:09, Reply)
I'm pretty sure that everyone on OT is a dickhead.
Especially monster munch.

Do petiole still use "dickhead"? It's a great insult.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:54, Reply)
Power to the Petiole!

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:58, Reply)
I really don't understand the predictive text / autocorrect on my phone.
Is "petiole" even a word? It's certainly not a common one, if it is.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 13:05, Reply)
It's summat to do with flowers

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 13:09, Reply)
Well, I am always banging on about horticulture.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 13:12, Reply)
pansies, mostly

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 13:18, Reply)
mostly

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 13:27, Reply)
i dun ur mum up the petiole

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 13:50, Reply)
Dummies Guide to Anilingus

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:13, Reply)
Clarkson for PM

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:16, Reply)
this isn't google, y'know

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 12:21, Reply)
it's my first day

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 13:22, Reply)
Isn't it about time for a lunch thread?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 13:16, Reply)
I can't wait to tell everyone about this1 Bizarre Vegetable That Restores Your Memory

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 13:30, Reply)
You Won't Believe What Happens Next!
I Can't Remember What Happened Previously!
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 13:45, Reply)
morning

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:26, Reply)
Good morning

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:26, Reply)
respect

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:28, Reply)
cheers

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:30, Reply)
frasier

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:43, Reply)
the tortellis

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:46, Reply)
the fratellis?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:15, Reply)

fruitellas?
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 10:18, Reply)
CHEWITS

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 10:23, Reply)
willie dewitt

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 10:50, Reply)
Willie Stroker

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 10:53, Reply)
bram stoker

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 11:03, Reply)
Crazy Frog
*bram bram br-br-br-bram bram*
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 11:11, Reply)
Cheers

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:51, Reply)
HIYA!

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:32, Reply)
yep, now it feels like a morning

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:40, Reply)
morning

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:44, Reply)
Good morning.
I've been listening to Kanye West, in order to find out why people are so upset about him being booked for Glastonbury.
I feel I am lagging someway behind the edge of popular culture.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:46, Reply)
he seems perfect for glasto to be honest
he is a prick though
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:47, Reply)
Sounds like he could put on a good show, so I don't really understand the upset.
Maybe I just haven't got to the song where he slags off farmers, hippies and trustafarians, yet?
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:56, Reply)
i think it's a mix of people who don't want him there because he's a bellend
people who don't want him there because they have the mistaken idea it's a rock festival
and people who don't want him there because he's black?
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:00, Reply)
it's all very strange
when did we start expecting pop stars not to be bellends?
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:03, Reply)
it's the e-petition generation, man

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:14, Reply)
yet we want our tv stars to be complete and utter bellends

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:19, Reply)
You know what, if people don't like him, they don't have to listen to him, do they
Have I made my point, Manolith? I think I have.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:18, Reply)
Also, it's not fair to mock him
What with him being genetically predisposed towards intellectually suboptimal performance.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:19, Reply)
are we talking about kanye or manolith now?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:23, Reply)
I think we both know the answer to that one

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:30, Reply)
is it manolith?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:32, Reply)
you're going to need to keep a lower profile than this if I'm to convince people you are dead

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:34, Reply)
oh yeah, my bad

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:37, Reply)
:(

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:50, Reply)
oh you just know what everyone should do, don't you

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:46, Reply)
will we get new icons now the doveston is dead?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:48, Reply)
i dunno
you'd have to ask someone less genetically predisposed towards intellectually suboptimal performance

whatever that means
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:59, Reply)
good point

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 10:15, Reply)
a little dove of peace, as that's all he wanted :'(

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 10:16, Reply)
he's not really on my radar, but I am assured by people I respect who like that sort of thing that he has released some worthy material

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:47, Reply)
Bit of a living cartoon, but his music seems alright.
Once you get past the traditional misogyny that seems to be unavoidable in the hippity-hop genre.
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:53, Reply)
to put in white van terms
he got that fit bird with the tits and fat arse up the duff
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:50, Reply)
he's toured around the world from london to the bay, It's kanye go kanye mc kanye yo kanye and the rest can go and play
cheers
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:56, Reply)
cheers

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:56, Reply)
his last album was a bit shit

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:41, Reply)
There's loads on Deezer, but they don't bother to date them, so I just downloaded two with teddy bears on them.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:49, Reply)
late registration is my favourite I think

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 10:15, Reply)
That's the one.
Good fun.

Is anyone going to point out what an idiot I am for downloading it, rather than importing some obscure, white level, vinyl pressing of something completely different that no one else has ever heard of?
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 10:19, Reply)
I don't think he's done anything good since 'getting jiggy with it'

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:54, Reply)
look right, it was just a prank, i didn't know anybody would get hurt

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:56, Reply)
that's what they all say

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:59, Reply)
go and hide until it all blows over, I'll cover for you

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:59, Reply)
ok, if anyone asks, i also died in the accident

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:27, Reply)
Cheers.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:06, Reply)
morning?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:19, Reply)
8/10 good effort

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 9:34, Reply)
What's for breakfast?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 6:06, Reply)
Bacon obvs

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 7:05, Reply)
Porridge

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 7:40, Reply)
Beast wing?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:03, Reply)
Not On Normal Communal Excercise Wing.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:16, Reply)
Fuck off, N.O.N.C.E.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:39, Reply)
took your time...nice.

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:51, Reply)
sbinach and ricotta tortellini

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 7:49, Reply)
with milk?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:01, Reply)
yeah so what?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:07, Reply)
cow milk?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:12, Reply)
coffee and remorse

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:11, Reply)

jelly.b3ta.com/talk/7809168
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:15, Reply)
hopefully cow's milk from the industrial dairy farm nearby

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:17, Reply)
is this where they produce lots of Anne Franks or actual books?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:21, Reply)
a deconstructed salad cream and nutella lightly toasted open sandwich and a pint of energy drink in a dog bowl

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:17, Reply)
living the dream

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:19, Reply)
eating the dream

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:21, Reply)
not a morning thread, apparently

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:22, Reply)
sorted m8

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:26, Reply)
ta

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 8:40, Reply)

🐨🐨🐹🐹🚐🚐
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 22:24, Reply)
^ 2nd leader in TheTimes today

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 22:26, Reply)
piss yer pants

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 22:35, Reply)
He shouldn't run so fast then

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 22:41, Reply)
Yeah Gay Times right lads

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 23:04, Reply)
you live in gay times m8

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 23:05, Reply)

🎋
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 22:28, Reply)
typical coon

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 22:36, Reply)
alice braga y/n

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 22:31, Reply)
y

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 22:35, Reply)
Bin bhuna

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 22:37, Reply)
muppo muppi muppa mippum

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 22:51, Reply)

Mods🐕👈
(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 1:00, Reply)
Wot?

(, Wed 25 Mar 2015, 1:33, Reply)
You'll never guess what I'm making for dinner.

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 19:54, Reply)
Toast

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 20:16, Reply)
soft shell crab

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 20:19, Reply)
Biscuits
NO! WAIT! it's a trick question - YOU aren't actually making dinner, its being prepared for you in some way
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 20:20, Reply)
I put my bins out, earlier.
Is there some connection?
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 20:38, Reply)
Fish 'n' Chips?

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 20:59, Reply)
bin lard

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 21:14, Reply)
french bin soup

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 21:20, Reply)
I stand corrected as some of you guessed, but none of you guessed correctly.

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 21:27, Reply)
don't care

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 21:33, Reply)
evi-fucking-dently

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 22:25, Reply)
You're probably right there
but it's black bins in the morning.
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 22:11, Reply)
don't make me guess
it's cheesy pasta bake isn't it
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 22:21, Reply)
you knows it Delia Smith

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 22:26, Reply)
:'(
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FGgVwmFj4Gw
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 22:32, Reply)
Something really fucking dull.
You know what they say, you are what you eat!!lol
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 22:26, Reply)
the doveston invited you to play candy crush saga

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 18:20, Reply)
oh god i'm so conflicted

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 18:28, Reply)
did he bollox

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 18:44, Reply)
they've upgraded android and now my phone confuses me
^ old
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 19:23, Reply)
apparently mine can run "apps"

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 20:01, Reply)
ive got apps, but eryting has changed, the way you delete stuff, the email cache needed deleting, the icons changed, man, they were icons

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 20:44, Reply)
I'm non-plussed by Lollipop on my phone, and actively dislike it on my tablet.
The notification bar feels wrong.
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 20:42, Reply)
it all looks gay , can I roll off? or whatever you sort of people say

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 20:45, Reply)
If you're phones got an unlocked boot loader, I think you should be able to load a previous version,
but there's no easy rollback option, more's the pity.
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 20:50, Reply)
your mums got an unlocked boot loader, tl;dr

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 21:00, Reply)
There was no need for that, mongy.

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 23:13, Reply)
don't know what that is soz

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 18:50, Reply)
thank you

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 19:00, Reply)
I can't imagine Angelina Jolie's weight loss DVD being a huge success.

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:42, Reply)
Oof
Pow, right in the babymaker
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:43, Reply)
I didn't really get clarity from scouse in the previous thread, but my answer is Mingus. Charles Mingus.

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:02, Reply)
he never called himself charlie, but for some reason that was how his name appeared on his 1962 album Tijuana Moods

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:04, Reply)
it's interesting to me, anyway

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:04, Reply)
^jazz wanker

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 16:38, Reply)
lol, charles minges

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:10, Reply)
see? this is why people say mean things about you

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:13, Reply)
the sad thing is he really can't see it

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:14, Reply)
If he would just cut his hair, you know?
I wish he'd listen to me
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:22, Reply)
a little grooming and personal hygiene can go a long way

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:28, Reply)
disgusting

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:32, Reply)
soz, can't hear you
too much hair in my ears
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:42, Reply)
I've got a mad hankering for some fish
but I don't have time to go to the shop now. I tell you, my life is really hard sometimes.
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:47, Reply)
thou shalt have a fishy (on a little dishy). thou shalt have a fishy when the boat comes in
AND NOT BEFORE
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 15:04, Reply)
I'm damned if I'm singing for my mammy OR my daddy

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 15:12, Reply)
i've heard you sing
it's probably for the best
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 15:39, Reply)
I am so bored
I want to do something completely different, but for the same money. That's not too much to ask, is it?
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 15:41, Reply)
not really, but you may have to spend a long time looking
i ended up with something completely different for the same money but it took an odd combination of being very unlucky and very lucky. have you tried that?
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 15:49, Reply)
I haven't, maybe I should

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 15:52, Reply)
god speed, two hats

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 16:09, Reply)
I could write a book
but what would it be about?
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 16:10, Reply)
the illicit love between a butler and his butlee?

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 16:11, Reply)
that's just original enough to work
I might even get a sunday night mini series out of it
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 16:17, Reply)
could you get her off the telly to get her boobs out in it?

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 16:23, Reply)
herons

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 16:21, Reply)
I can offer you something similar, but for considerably less money
that any good to you?
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 16:02, Reply)
it might involve relocating

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 16:02, Reply)
Is it butlering?
Because I can buttle.
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 16:06, Reply)
disgusting

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 16:07, Reply)
I'd buttle the shit out of you, sweetheart

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 16:10, Reply)
crikey

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 16:11, Reply)
excellent choice
I had to leave for lunch and do a difficult yet rewarding shit
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:13, Reply)
it is nice when your efforts pay off

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:14, Reply)
shitting on your break??? that's madness

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:16, Reply)
Couldn't hold it in

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:17, Reply)
I hope you to go home early for it

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:20, Reply)
i might down tools in a bit

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:32, Reply)
is there any tit in it?

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:13, Reply)
I thought it a bit sad when the one off of married with children had hers cut off
they played an integral part in my adolescence
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:16, Reply)
seems like it's a bit of a fashion thing in Hollywood now

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:19, Reply)
no doubt they'll all be doing it here soon

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:22, Reply)
Christina Applegate?

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 15:04, Reply)
dunno who that is soz

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 16:03, Reply)
Favourite Charlie?
Can't say Charlie Brooker, seriously.
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 12:43, Reply)
The Charlie you sniff

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 12:44, Reply)
Chalk, Chaplin and Bucket
in that order
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 12:49, Reply)
Who wouldn't want to be legally represented by a firm called Chalk, Chaplin & Bucket?

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 12:50, Reply)
probably someone who has been raped by a clown

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:03, Reply)
Oh, and Charlie Brown
good grief
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:17, Reply)
and the problem with the Charlie Chalk theme tune is that it's all too easy to slip into the Hi-De-Hi theme tune
So embarrassing
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:18, Reply)
Let's not forget Paul Shane:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZJvGdOC6D1Y
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:24, Reply)
I knew what that would be before even clicking it
What a wonderful performance that is
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:26, Reply)
same
I feel privileged to have watched this live on television, it really shuts up those who watched the kennedy assassination or the moon landings
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:39, Reply)
It's right up there with Where were you when that bird off corrie licked that blokes knob

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:41, Reply)
John Wayne Gacy nice.

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:19, Reply)
He really wasn't, you know
In fact, he was about as far away from nice as it's possible to get
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:23, Reply)
sufjan stevens managed to write a nice song about him though
youtu.be/otx49Ko3fxw
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:45, Reply)
still waiting for the other 48 albums

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:01, Reply)
that was grim

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 14:14, Reply)
Charlie the cat from the safety films.

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 12:56, Reply)
nice

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:04, Reply)
sheen

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 12:59, Reply)
great actor and top drug user

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:04, Reply)
can i say Hitler?

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:06, Reply)
yes, yes you can

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:08, Reply)
Charlie Chase from the Cold Crush Brothers OF COURSE
God you IDIOT
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:06, Reply)
Bronx respect

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:08, Reply)
Chaplain

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:06, Reply)
excellent

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:09, Reply)
Charlie Chuck Chuck

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:07, Reply)
yes!

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:09, Reply)
Brandt

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:15, Reply)
Hitler

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:16, Reply)
Charlize Theron

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:17, Reply)
Charlie Sheen
TIGER BLOOD
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:17, Reply)
Manson

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:18, Reply)
I'll have to get back to you

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:22, Reply)
^proper charlie

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:27, Reply)
that's why I'm your favourite

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:38, Reply)
Although I can't reply to you all individually
thank you for your contributions
(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:25, Reply)
cheers

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:26, Reply)
does it have to be someone who used the soubriquet charlie, or can I have a charles?

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:37, Reply)
Same question, but with "Chuck"

(, Tue 24 Mar 2015, 13:41, Reply)

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