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Home » Messageboard » If advertisments were honest » Message 648580

[challenge entry] aphrodisiac my arse.

From the If advertisments were honest challenge. See all 785 entries (closed)

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Nick Riviera, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:06, archived)
# Blech,
Very WOO! but blecchh.
(I helped save b3ta! bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:07, archived)
# What have you changed?
You've just lifted an advert from the North Sea Oyster Organisation, haven't you?
(_, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:08, archived)
# busted.
the only reason they are known as an aphrodisiac is because after eating them, oral sex is like the sweet trolley arriving.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Nick Riviera, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:09, archived)
# in response to your earlier question
bi-celibate
(I helped save b3ta! Pootle, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:12, archived)
# Ive heard Steven Fry say something similar.
he says his sexuality is about who he chooses not to sleep with.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Nick Riviera, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:17, archived)
# How eloquently, and amusingly put.
I once spent 7 hours evacuating myself noisily from my major orifices upon my return from France, having spent the evening in what we thought was a romantic restaurant, but in reality whose kitchen was probably an open sewer.
(I helped save b3ta! brainstuff can eat a whole shredded wheat, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:12, archived)
# your
poor girlfriend - knowing you think that must be a real ego-boost.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Phil Kitten, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:12, archived)
# it's ok
his girlfriend is an oyster.
(martian, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:14, archived)
# you calling her
selfish?
(I helped save b3ta! Professor Fnord Regius Professor of B3ta Chronology, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:16, archived)
# Pun, punpun, pun,
P U U U U U U U N N N N
(I helped save b3ta! bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:19, archived)
# I said oral
so it worked both ways.

I love lickin the prawn anyway.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Nick Riviera, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:15, archived)
# You silver tongued devil you,
(I helped save b3ta! bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:17, archived)
# Have you taken some School Maam tablets today?
You are being very harsh on the rude boys.
(I helped save b3ta! Uncle Joe, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:16, archived)
# not really,
but they are all being quite rude today for some reason.

Too many "you stupid/leaky female" posts for me. I might bugger off for a bit.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Phil Kitten, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:18, archived)
# boo.
sorry, didnt mean to upset you Doc.

in response though, mine is sexually ambiguous.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Nick Riviera, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:19, archived)
# *scritches Dr Nick's velvety bonce companionably*
Not you specifick'ly. :)
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Phil Kitten, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:21, archived)
# Im completely bald at the mo.
bic'ing my head to make me look mean and moody.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Nick Riviera, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:23, archived)
# If you consider many ads to be thinly disguised pr0n
then once given the b3ta treatment they might turn out a bit rude.

I was surprised to see the Andrex ad on the front page. Not that I want to censure, but if is our shop window.
(I helped save b3ta! Uncle Joe, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:26, archived)
# No,
don't.
Stop it everyone.
(I helped save b3ta! bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:21, archived)
# tsk
silly boy
(I helped save b3ta! new_matt, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:14, archived)
# thats lovely
i nearly spat ice tea at the screen
the spaz is wizzing today
wyH
(Chorlton, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:08, archived)
# "oh they are so sophisticated"
no, no they are not, they are rubber lumps of yuck
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Drink, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:09, archived)
# agreed.
just cracked. phoned my man about getting Henry. He's on holiday. AAaaaagh!!
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Nick Riviera, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:11, archived)
# mine's in dublin.
the bastard.

ps: don't feel guilty 'bout cracking, i give up every day (till i get home from work)
(I helped save b3ta! Godzuki needs more sleep., Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:13, archived)
# getting Henry
is this your code for falling off the (dope) wagon?
(I helped save b3ta! Ijon Tichy, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:15, archived)
# yes
.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Nick Riviera, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:16, archived)
# Getting Henry?
I prefer to get Doug myself..... he's sitting in my house now. He should be paying rent, but has only paid one eigth of it. Hopefully he should be around next week.

did that make sense?
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Drink, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:22, archived)
# sort of.
I used to love having these mad phonecalls where code would be wittered, and Id turn up at someones house with completely the wrong thing.

If you need help on the rent.....
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Nick Riviera, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:27, archived)
# Wise in the ways
of drugs slang am I (..?)
(I helped save b3ta! Ijon Tichy, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:24, archived)
# aye
bogey food
(I helped save b3ta! aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:11, archived)
# That made me laugh out loud!
I really don't think I'll try them now :-/
(I helped save b3ta! Lori, Fri 10 Jan 2003, 15:29, archived)