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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Dozers thread is shit and populated by wankers like Captain Placid
So lets instead talk about A Level results day. They say that the grades won't go up this year because the exam boards were given different guidance.

Is this unfair on the poor little poppets who just want to get into Uni to spunk 3 years of mum and dads money up the wall, or is it a sensible decision to improve educational standards in this country?

Or, without changing the way schools actually teach subjects, is mucking around with the grading process just so much hot air?
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:25, 166 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
Sorry Al, we've all got you on ignore.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:27, Reply)
I don't like this place any more.
It's become so intolerant.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:27, Reply)
I love you, Al

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:36, Reply)
I love you too sportso, but I fear that just two people sharing their feelings isn't enough to turn the tide

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:44, Reply)
GROUP HUG

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:50, Reply)
Alright Al,
can i call you Al?
I'm not sure i give a shit about what some snotty eighteen year old pricks do with their lives. As long as the University system is the way it is, and companies still place the weight on degree level education that they do (although this is changing slowly) people will clamour to get in to any university. You could 3 C's, get a shit university, get a shit degree, put degree on CV, done. It all seems to be a bit of a farce.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:31, Reply)
If he can call you Betty

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:34, Reply)
Okay here's a thought, I'm just putting it out there.
You may not really care what any particular snotty 18 year old does with their life, but as a whole our society does depend on young people becoming educated, getting jobs and paying their taxes. So, if their education standards are dropping, they are less likely to be able to take on well paid jobs in an increasingly technological world, and therefore tax revenues will fall, leading to a vicious circle where we are unable to compete on a global scale.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:38, Reply)
true,
but we also need a raft of people to work the phones in the call centres of our new technologically advanced world. And even those phone monkey companies want a degree in something.

The system is no good as it is, but i have no idea what to do to it.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:41, Reply)
The exam boards are in competion with each other, the schools are too.
Of course the results will show an improvement, due to market forces. It is unfair on the kids that have to take the courses and do the exams just to be unemployed. But, seeing as I don't have kids, and flunked my A levels, I don't care.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:34, Reply)
A levels are merely an entrance to Uni
Now that they are charging £9K a year, I'll bet most lower their entry grades anyway as less people can afford to go.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:36, Reply)
Fewer, darling.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:52, Reply)
Proof that educational standards have been suffering since at least the early 90s

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:54, Reply)
I only started school in the early 90s, so that's obviously bollocks too.
I think a lot of the problem is down to parents expecting schools to do all the work and taking no responsibility for their kids not being thick cunts. My mum taught me to read and write before I started school, and I think that helped considerably.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:58, Reply)
I was referring to sporto, not you.
Your mum taught me a thing or two as well.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:00, Reply)
...and me

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:02, Reply)
It'll likely be quicker to list the people who haven't shagged my mum.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:03, Reply)
We've had this argument on here before
"less" can replace "fewer" but "fewer" can not replace "less". It's a modern, but acceptable usage.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:00, Reply)
Except that fewer was the correct term.
Fewer is discrete, less is continuous.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:01, Reply)
Don't start this off again
Kroney will start speaking in Old English soon.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:03, Reply)
If you have a group of people, and some leave, there are fewer people.
If you have one person and cut their leg off, there's less person. That is how it works, no exceptions, fuck Kroney and his retard ways.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:05, Reply)
I'm on your side on this one, Deddo.
But this has been debated at great length on these pages several times.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:08, Reply)
I think I love you BraynDedd.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:34, Reply)
"Was" being the operative word, I'm afraid.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:05, Reply)
Look, I'm all for the English language adapting and evolving, that is the beauty of it.
What I'm not okay with is changing it to accommodate the stupid.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:08, Reply)
I didn't say I liked it, I said it was acceptable.
Using your example, it's something to do with a group of people being a crowd and so if you remove part of that crowd, there's less crowd left. Language drift, rather than lack of education.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:11, Reply)
No, that would be fine under my idea of the rules too.
Less crowd, fewer people composing said crowd. The crowd is a single thing, the people are not.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:13, Reply)
Yeah, I know what you mean. For the most part I agree with you.
I'm just saying that the rules aren't as rigid as that anymore.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:16, Reply)
They should be though, we make too many allowances for thickos.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:17, Reply)
They don't even teach correct spelling anymore.
Grammar's a lost hope.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:18, Reply)
Which is why we are sending her to Switzerland.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:20, Reply)
not a chance.
Well, not the proper Unis anyway. We've just put ours up 2 years in a row and we're still at least 4 times oversubscribed.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:21, Reply)
i was looking at our interview list
only a handful of unis across all interviewees: oxbridge, manchester, warwick, bristol, edinburgh, durham and london. that was it. and we had over 100 applicants per place. employers get snobby when too much choice.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:23, Reply)
My A Level results day was somewhat overshadowed by the missus at the time getting shit AS Level results, which I was then blamed for.
Not my fault she couldn't be arsed working.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:52, Reply)
I got into uni with one A level at grade E.
I graduated last month with a Desmond. It's all bullshit.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:53, Reply)
One mark off a 2.1 as well. I was fucking fuming.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:54, Reply)
steady, Deddy
You can't be fuming about failing to get a 2:1 if it's all bullshit. Make your mind up now.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:31, Reply)
You didn't study english, did you?

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:54, Reply)
No, software development.
I didn't need to study English due to my ability to already speak and write coherently.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:55, Reply)
Just checking.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:58, Reply)
Ah, where did you study that? (the degree, not English)

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:25, Reply)
Sheffield Hallam.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:27, Reply)
That was one of the Unis I was looking at when I was still considering it, but I ended up looking more towards a broader spectrum computing degree
Then I got bored of the idea and went to the pub.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:33, Reply)
*shit A level fives*
I also entered the world of higher education with just the one A level.
I then proceeded to, as Al put it, spunk three years of mum and dad's money up the wall.
My folks are so proud of me.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:55, Reply)
My parents told me in no uncertain terms to fuck off if I thought I was getting a penny from them.
Which was fair enough really.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:00, Reply)
I also ended up with only one A Level, but by that point I was sick of academia altogether
Got my current job 4 months later, been here 5 1/2 years now.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 9:58, Reply)
But Al, everyone is daddy's little scholar ! 50% of people should go to uni, said the man in charge.
I left at gcse level, some people are better off getting on with life. I'd say at least 1/3 of the people who went to uni who I know, went for 'the experience' or because "it's next in the list". You'd have more to show if you took £10k and went traveling.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:01, Reply)
With hindsight I might have been better off leaving at GCSE level
But then why deny myself five years of drinking at my parents' expense?
Working for a living is shit, so I was quite happy to delay it.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:07, Reply)
Because you should have more respect for your parents and you've missed out on 5 years worth of practical experience (and rises/promotions)
5 years and you can be managing a supermarket on £30k plus benefits. Tell me how many graduates start on that?
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:11, Reply)
Which was why I said I might've been better off.
I was merely being facetious about my parents to cover my shame about how it actually turned out.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:19, Reply)
Most of mine start on around £35-£40K these days.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:25, Reply)
But the difference is, from what I gather, is that you teach the more elite.
You couldn't get on your course if you were average at best.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:38, Reply)
nope, but it's also that you simply can't do the jobs our grads do without a (specifically, this) degree.
I'm totally in agreement with your original point, by the way - we shouldn't be sending 50% of the popuation to uni. Maybe 15% is a better idea. It was less than 20% when I went and I'm still fucking astounded how fast that has changed.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:40, Reply)
would you fuck
people who think they gained "life experience" from spunking 10K backpacking round the world need repeatedly kicking in the balls.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:24, Reply)
They need to go the University of LIFE

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:05, Reply)
Formerly Realworld Polytechnic

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:09, Reply)
Morning all
The A level result thing was being covered on the news this morning. One of the segments included twins one was going straight into employment the other to university, talk about a sliding door moment. I would love to see how this affects them 5 years from now.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:10, Reply)
Bollocks, you were just watching it for the teenage girls jumping up and down.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:11, Reply)
Well Obvs.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:13, Reply)
My brother was good friends with twins who gained the same results at A Levels, that was a bit odd.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:15, Reply)
One will probably be much richer than the other.
especially if they're self-employed.

Funny how in all the fuss there's been about legal ways people and companies evade tax that the self-employed haven't been mentioned. I don't know anyone self employed who pays tax, and they all seem quite well off for people who don't make a profit. Most happily admit to avoiding tax in any way possible.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:15, Reply)
You can legitimately write off an absurd amount of stuff if you're self employed though.
I put part of my rent because I was using one room as an office, all my travel costs, boots, laptop, all kinds of shit that on PAYE would just be tough shit, buy it with your wages.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:23, Reply)
Yes, and all that is completely legal.
and can be done without having to get into the illegal "cash jobs" scenario, either.
Knowing what I know now I'd have sacked going to Uni and learnt to be a joiner or a sparky.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:28, Reply)
Al I am pissed off about all arsenals players fucking off every season.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:16, Reply)
OMG me TOO
We're like twins, Bob.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:19, Reply)
I'm Danny de Vito.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:21, Reply)
i'm fb friends with both of you, and i've met kroney
this statement is absolutely true
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:22, Reply)
Either he's a lot hotter than people on here give him credit for
or I'm even fatter than I thought.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:22, Reply)
*something about a perfect arse*

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:41, Reply)
I didn't say it was perfect
I said it was pretty good.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:51, Reply)
Are you confirming that Kroney is like Arnold Schwarzenegger?

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:23, Reply)
Hahaha
*bitter*
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:24, Reply)
I thought you deleted me ages ago?

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:26, Reply)
no, you must have deleted me
the only person i ever deleted was psychochomp, for being a cunt.

oh, and al. but we're fb friends again now.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:41, Reply)
Maybe, I am a cunt.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:48, Reply)
why are you picking on poppet?
what's she ever done to you?
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:21, Reply)
Because she's picking on everyone lately.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:22, Reply)
Rejected him, I reckon.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:22, Reply)
He's not picking on me, he's begging for my attention.
it's like the batsignal, he calls my name, and I appear. Just to insult him.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:26, Reply)
I wonder if they're doing that blog about newspapers finding hot blond twins with straight A's

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:23, Reply)
Yep they did, look above
Do they have to be female?
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:27, Reply)
Oh they've stopped it.
sexyalevels.tumblr.com/
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:29, Reply)
I've never even heard of this before

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:31, Reply)
lol trolled to death
YOU JUST DONT UNDERSTAND OUR IRONING SKILLZ
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:36, Reply)
Fuck me I don't remember posing for this
www.gazettelive.co.uk/news/teesside-news/2011/08/18/teesside-students-celebrating-a-level-results-84229-29258222/
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:47, Reply)
I dunno man, I don't do your A-level crap.
Tell me what to do with my day tomorrow. I'm taking it off. Not going to my (one and only) lecture.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:25, Reply)
Well the day has to start with fingers and lube, obviously.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:26, Reply)
considering I'm in my mate's house, and they're all blokes, I don't think they'd take that well.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:26, Reply)
You really don't understand men.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:27, Reply)
I think you'll find they'll take it extremely well.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:27, Reply)
^ this ^

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:29, Reply)
^^ agreed ^^

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:29, Reply)
Not if one of them is gay, one is taken, and the other two are just not interested.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:34, Reply)

just not interested clearly also gay
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:36, Reply)
Or pretending not to be interested to ncrease the chances of seeing her tits.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:39, Reply)
Really... Yeah men hate that stuff

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:29, Reply)
I dunno about you, Bob, but if an attractive girl started frotting herself in my house
I'd throw her right out on her ear. I mean, you'd never get the stains out of the chaise longue, would you?
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:30, Reply)
I for one would be appalled with this sort of behaviour.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:31, Reply)
Well an attractive girl I would allow, poppet* on the other hand...
*has never seen poppet
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:35, Reply)
They also really hate it when you make them cups of coffee.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:30, Reply)
+ bacon sandwiches.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:31, Reply)
And fetch you beer.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:33, Reply)
And iron your clothes.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:34, Reply)
do all that yourself you lazy cunts.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:35, Reply)
Wimmin's jobs, innit.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:36, Reply)
Tell you what, once you've washed the car I'll take you shopping for something small and lacy.
How does that sound treacle?
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:37, Reply)
Sounds like you can shove it up your fucking jacksy.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:38, Reply)
Hahaha

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:39, Reply)
You know, I'd quite happily exchange washing the car for a purchase from Agent Provocateur
When I still had a car I used to have to wash it and I didn't get anything for that.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:45, Reply)
you got a clean car.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:46, Reply)
But clean car and dirty knickers sounds so much more fun
NB, I do not mean 'dirty' as in 'soiled'.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:53, Reply)
yes, you did, you terrible harlot.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:00, Reply)
I like to think that I'm pretty open minded
but pre-worn pants is just grim.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:05, Reply)
....
yes.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:24, Reply)
+ just wearing a thong.
(note for Poppet - this is the Queen's English use of 'thong' as in a skimpy lower-half undergarment. While I'm pretty sure some people would reach Def Con Bongle on the back of a lass just wearing a single flipflop, that's not my bag. Soz)
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:33, Reply)
Aren't you like 16 or so?

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:33, Reply)
I think she's about 20 or sutin now.
Apparently, time passes on here. Fuck knows how.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:34, Reply)
Okay, that aside, this is still a creepy subthread.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:37, Reply)
You're right, actually.
I've been here too long, I've caught low level creepy.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:38, Reply)
creepSy
i, for one, am maintaining shambles' most excellent improvement of this word
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:40, Reply)
She's 20.
Which, apparently, is enough.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:34, Reply)
Enough for what?
And yes, I'm 20.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:35, Reply)
For open field sweaty-handedness.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:38, Reply)
Oh BOY.
Can't wait for that to start.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:39, Reply)
Enough to be creeped at by internet weirdos.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:38, Reply)
Take a look around you
you've been here long enough. You felt you needed to say this?
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:45, Reply)
Half your age plus seven is the youngest you should go apparently.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:35, Reply)
Again, a bit spergishly creepy.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:41, Reply)
It was on xkcd.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:45, Reply)
The prosecution rests.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:47, Reply)
The "rules" say I'm not allowed to touch anything under 25 now
Fucking rules.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:35, Reply)
19 for me.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:35, Reply)
26 for me.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:36, Reply)
158 for me

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:37, Reply)
We're talking about ages, not restraining orders, Chompy.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:44, Reply)
Ha ha.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:46, Reply)

"rules" "wedding ring"
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:40, Reply)
No, the wedding ring says I'm not allowed to touch anything.
The rules, on the other hand, specify the age of the things I'm not allowed to touch anyway.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:41, Reply)
oh
it's like a double lot of rules.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:42, Reply)
This is why I don't wear a wedding ring*



* not true, I simply don't like wearing jewellery.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:43, Reply)
Technically, right now mine is on a thing around my neck.
So I'm not wearing it either. terrible husband.

Edit - you'll get a lot more ladies trying it on if you do wear one, though. IME.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:44, Reply)
My wife isn't bothered in the slightest that I don't have one.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:45, Reply)
i think they should be fitted with tasers, myself

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:48, Reply)
wives? or wedding rings?

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:48, Reply)
men's wedding rings
"i wasn't staring at that bird's arrrrrrrrgh"
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:51, Reply)
Maybe we shouldn't have to wear them in the first place.
We aren't pieces of meat to be tagged with some kind of symbol of ownership. It's like when farmers stick plastic tags through sheep.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:13, Reply)
I was told by the ex that I *would* be wearing a wedding ring
regardless of my feelings on the subject.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:15, Reply)
WE ARE MEN, NOT OBJECTS

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:17, Reply)
I told her she didn't have to wear one if she didn't want to, either.
I have never worn a ring in my life and I wouldn't be comfortable with suddenly wearing one all the time. No dice. I would wear one and that was that.

I didn't really think that was fair.

I'd have been ok with wearing it around my neck or something, I think. She wasn't OK with that.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:19, Reply)
Did this conversation take place in the Jorvik Centre?

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:23, Reply)
Hahaha no
Some time before that. She was a stubborn woman.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:24, Reply)
I frequently fiddled with my ring (hohoho) and kept dropping it,
which pissed the ex right off. I hate gold as well, so I thought it looked shit.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:24, Reply)
My wedding ring isn't bothered in the slightest that I don't own an wife.
Probably because it got melted down after I flogged it.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:49, Reply)
You stay away from me.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:41, Reply)
I'm a caring and considerate lover.

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:42, Reply)
boooooooooring

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:42, Reply)
You know me
I just prefer to mind my own binniss.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 10:54, Reply)
the council took away the big binniss at the end of our road,
now we have to keep our rubbish in the flat until bin day like the rest of you :(
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:01, Reply)
I dislike our bin men
I dislike them a great deal
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:04, Reply)
I don't know what you're expecting if you sleep in a wheelie bin

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:05, Reply)
Two Hats!
The most effectual Two Hats!
Who's intellectual close friends get to call him T.H.
Providing it's with dignity.

Two Hats!
The indisputable leader of the gang.
He's the boss, he's a pip, he's the championship.
He's the most tip top,
Two Hats.

Yes he's a chief, he's a king,
But above everything,
He's the most tip top,
Two Hats.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:07, Reply)
Ok, this might be the best thing ever
But I'll have to check
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:17, Reply)
My bin only has one wheel :(

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:17, Reply)
Is it still rollin' along?

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:27, Reply)
Those pesky Cherokees

(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:32, Reply)
I've done a new thread,
it's shit though, so probably best to ignore it.
(, Thu 16 Aug 2012, 11:28, Reply)

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