I'm just going to be honest here, there's a hmmm? thing I do which I only started doing because it's annoying as fuck and now it's starting to appear when I speak to peopleIt's in place of 'duh'. Where did you put the vegetables? In the vegetable drawer, hmmm?
It helps if you make it sound friendly, because it clearly isn't, and that's even more annoying, hmmm?
(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 13:43,
Reply)
I hope you do it in as Yoda-ish a voice as possible.(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 24 Jun 2026, 13:49,
Reply)
Again with the nerdy, seeing a pattern here, YOUR POOR WIFE(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 13:54,
Reply)
I'm force-pulling your bulbous fuselage from the swamp right now IYKWIM(, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 15:58, Reply)
a nice classic pass-ag move, well donealigned with body tension and a clenched mouth, a sound standing in for the unspoken words clamped and held inside the throat. cousin of the bright, brittle smile and the hard stare
(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 14:16,
Reply)
I like your take on this vlad but I've got more of a pull-the-chin-in-and-raise-the-old-eyebrows thing going on(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 15:39,
Reply)
hmm ok lemme think(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 15:58,
Reply)
Once there was this boy whoHad a lot of vegetables and had to store them safely, but
When he tried to store them
He put
Them all in all of the wrong drawers
He couldn't understand where
He really should have put them
Hmmm hmmm hmmm hmmm
(, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 16:07, Reply)
That's the second post I've done about that song recently, it must live rent-free in my head(, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 16:08, Reply)
I heard them playing at T in the Park, that voice was hard to take for multiple songsdidn't watch them obviously, absolute dogshit band
(, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 16:48, Reply)
^ proudly upholding /talk's anaphylactic relationship with talent(
.Yeti., Wed 24 Jun 2026, 16:59,
Reply)
phmmmmfffff(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 16:02,
Reply)
Somewhere in the world it is less than 36 degrees.Just not here.
(
Octo I ruin everything., Wed 24 Jun 2026, 7:12,
Reply)
Fucking hell that’s why it’s so hot CANDLES
(
garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 8:11,
Reply)
Thanks! My b3ta account can now legally drink in the US of A. But it's not going.(
Octo I ruin everything., Wed 24 Jun 2026, 9:39,
Reply)
Was it worth getting up for? One of my neighbors asked me, what the hell happened to england? I didn't know what that meant at first, they're just doing what england do.(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 13:59,
Reply)
a novel by Stephen Kingbut that’s not important right now
(
Cheers Cheers, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 7:54,
Reply)
The Running Out Of Time To Do Anything About Climate Change Man(
Octo I ruin everything., Wed 24 Jun 2026, 9:15,
Reply)
Oh, sweaty ballsacsand clammy clams are rife.
(
garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 9:10,
Reply)
just checking out the customer reviews on a fridge-freezer. enjoying the 5* review that reads in its entirety: "keeps stuff cold"
(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 10:11,
Reply)
I mean fucking A-1 really, what else do you need in a fridge-freezer
(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 10:12,
Reply)
"It's as cold as ice, and it's willing to sacrifice our love, would buy again"(, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 10:14, Reply)
hahahaha
(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 10:16,
Reply)
reading about another one rn which is promising a way to "say goodbye to food wastage and hello to efficient storage solutions"
I'd go insane writing this stuff, fully insane
back with the first one again: "...Plus, the LED lighting makes it easy to grab those carrots in a flash if you forgot to add them to the stew that’s already bubbling away. Dinner’s saved."
(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 10:19,
Reply)
tell a story, tell the customer a story, tell the customer a story about the carrots in their dinner, they need to be able to imagine their food in this fridge, ok great everyone let's break there, and could someone please stop jack crying again, look nobody loves this stuff jack, we'd all rather be writing our porn novellas, but we are where we are
(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 10:21,
Reply)
ffs Tony stop offering Jack those fucking carrots(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 14:06,
Reply)
I've just had an email from Rebel MC, or Congo Natty as he calls himself these daysHe addressed me as 'Lion' lol
(
Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 11:49,
Reply)
I played cards with two friends at the zoo once, I lost so much money. One was lion about his hand and the other was a cheetah
(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 12:55,
Reply)
😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎😎(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 12:55,
Reply)
*happy sigh*
(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 14:17,
Reply)
Was he clarifying whether he is a Yankee or a Londoner?(
broadsword, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 14:08,
Reply)
He's not been feeling well, poor chapRuff like a ninja, apparently
(
Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 16:51,
Reply)
fuck this. fuck that. fuck a duck. fuck a cat.(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 22:38,
Reply)
fuck a duck, we're as common as muck(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 23:00,
Reply)
You're not Bridget Bardot, I'm not Jack Palance.
I'm not Shirley Temple by any circumstance,
Or Fred Astaire
You're not Sidney Taffler, I'm not Dirk Bogarde.
I'm not very stylish and you're not avant garde,
Or Lionel Blair
We're as common as muck.
Bonne chance, viel glück, good luck
Where bold is beautiful we don't give a damn
(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 23:04,
Reply)
I canter believe you'd suggest this
(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 23:04,
Reply)
Alright Dr Seuss’ lifestyle coach(
Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 23:55,
Reply)
Bums. Locked myself out of the house for a couple of hoursBut the gym has air con so got a workout done. How you coping with the hotHOTTYhots?
(
garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 19:26,
Reply)
by reminding myself that those of us who are spared will look back on these years as a golden time, when things weren't so bad
(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 19:33,
Reply)
I know right 🥰(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 20:02,
Reply)
look into your heart though, you know it's true(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 20:02,
Reply)
Your lack of faith disturbs me (
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 21:38,
Reply)
Started an online business selling exclusively equipment designed to cool you down by moving the airJustFans I’m calling it, can’t think of any other more suitable names
(
Cheers Cheers, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 19:33,
Reply)
I'm setting up a site for sharing images of the greatest small town in Buckinghamshire, I'm calling it Olneyfans
(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 19:37,
Reply)
I’m considering a site dedicated to the unit of electrical resistanceOhmlyFans
(
Cheers Cheers, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 19:55,
Reply)
I'm going to start a website solely for the /board gayshiftOnlyFlans
(, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 21:00, Reply)
Well, I'm going to start website solely for the admiration of sidcharacters in Keeping Up ApperancesOnslowFans
(
garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 21:13,
Reply)
I'm going to start a website Focusing on keeping the tips of men's penises cool and comfortable in the heat, OnlyGlans
(
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 21:41,
Reply)
Sitting in my garden topless, probably offending the neighbours with my fat hairy sweatinessbut being too fat, hairy and sweaty to care. Online.
(
Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 20:05,
Reply)
did you workout how to get into your house(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 20:28,
Reply)
snarrrrf(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 21:20,
Reply)
Doing overtime I hate it, but the entire building has very good air conditioning.
(
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 20:40,
Reply)
I finished early tonightbut because some bellends fucked up last week, I'm not allowed to go home yet
(, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 20:59, Reply)
We've had electricians in Which means having to hoover bits of ceiling tile off desks.
(
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 21:37,
Reply)
Fox are determined to make everything about their world cup coverage as shit as possible(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 21:02,
Reply)
*opens legs to check*Nope, at least my cunt isn't singing "it's coming home"
(
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 21:44,
Reply)
pahahahaha (
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 22:05,
Reply)
there you go asking for details when you don't want details (
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 1:17,
Reply)
I have to admit I googled thisas I've got no fucking clue about fantasy novels
(, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 21:02, Reply)
An alternative name for Galadriel's husband Celeborn that Tolkien came up with is 'Teleporno.'(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 23 Jun 2026, 15:39,
Reply)
I feel like posting that has somehow cancelled out all the sex I've ever had...(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 23 Jun 2026, 15:39,
Reply)
I went to see a late night showing of Fellowship when it came out.I was with a female friend, and she was definitely in the minority. There were two Tolkien nerds behind us who had clearly paid to be upset about how unfaithful it was to the book. I asked them to pipe down a bit at the start when Galadriel's voice-over mentioned "the creature Gollum" ["The CREATURE?!?" one of them exclaimed, incredulously].
At the end, as the credits said "based on..." one of them yelled "based LOOSELY on the book by JRR Tolkien!"
tl;dr: even if all your sex has been cancelled out, it's still more than they ever had.
(, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 16:03, Reply)
Heh, they sound as bad as the Dr Who nerds.There are things I think PJ got wrong with the films, but on the whole they're pretty good.
(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 23 Jun 2026, 16:16,
Reply)
Yeah, the Two Towers lost it a bit for an hour or two but otherwise they were decent adaptations.Not including the Hobbit films, which were... unnecessary.
(, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 16:25, Reply)
I have deliberately avoided seeing those.I understand the source material feels thin, sort of stretched, like butter scraped over too much bread.
(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 23 Jun 2026, 16:42,
Reply)
I reckon there's a passable movie there if you combine them, but as it stands they're bloated and the embellishments are tone-deafJ R R Rowling
(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 16:52,
Reply)
There are apparently some fan edits that do a decent job of this.(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 23 Jun 2026, 17:37,
Reply)
You're on minus sex at this pointAlso: www.youtube.com/watch?v=rh70r9MXAvY
(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 17:41,
Reply)
Howling, HOWLING(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 19:02,
Reply)
you feeling every single erotic experience you've ever been blessed with being erased from your mind like marty mcfly watching himself fade out of the picture on the fretboard, screaming WHAT BASTARD DID THIS TO ME
(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 19:05,
Reply)
Peregrin Took It Up The Arse(
Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 16:48,
Reply)
I'm wondering if it gets up for the "soccer" . I did first match. Enjoyed it. Fucking 3am tho(
mongychops, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 14:09,
Reply)
I don't think I've had an actual plan this year. It's alright (
mongychops, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 15:02,
Reply)
Having sat through the first 55 minutes, in retrospect I'd say don't bother.(, Wed 24 Jun 2026, 6:48, Reply)
I'm having a bad hair dayonly joking it's looking lovely as ever.
(
Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 14:29,
Reply)
I started feeding the birds but the squirrels got involved and now they JUMP ABOUT ON THE DECK CHAIRS until i feed them(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 17:04,
Reply)
There should be an American version called Yardlife,and every line ends with "then I shot them"
(, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 17:57, Reply)
There haven't been as many school shootings in the news here recently, i genuinely wonder if that's just because it's not such shocking news any more. (
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 19:02,
Reply)
It’s too hot, even here in the NORTH®Andy Burnham’s fault
(
Cheers Cheers, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 18:10,
Reply)
On a train and realised I’d left a browser tab open because I was looking up how to spell SupremacistThe person sitting next me saw, and I now I know what it’s like to be garold
(
Cheers Cheers, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 8:13,
Reply)
Take it up with Cheers, he's the one suggesting you don't know how to spell a simple word like "supremacist."(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 23 Jun 2026, 10:25,
Reply)
Maybe they just thought you were really stupid and trying to google "supermarket".(
Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 8:29,
Reply)
I was half cut in the pub once, rapping a bit of Beastie Boys, and when I did the line 'the girls I like are underage' was one of those moments when the pub had gone momentarily silent.One of the greatest moments of my life.
(, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 8:37, Reply)
what's your new colleague like?oh you know, the sort of guy that raps in pubs
oh, sorry to hear that
yeah, I'm on the job websites now
(, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 9:19, Reply)
Getting needlessly upset about an innocuous /talk post on the internet.Is everything OK at home?
(, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 9:36, Reply)
pffffff(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 10:32,
Reply)
If Queef were a LOTR character, would he be called Bellrond or Smellrond? (
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 22 Jun 2026, 21:41,
Reply)
Hamwise Mancheese (
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 1:20,
Reply)
De do smell dron dron de do smell drom(
mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 23:06,
Reply)
andron andron andron and arisdrom(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 23:38,
Reply)
For some reason that caused a genuine IRL LOL out loud.(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 22 Jun 2026, 21:53,
Reply)
It's a very obscure character that only exists in the Peruvian 12" version, you probably haven't heard of him(, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 22:06, Reply)
WASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSUPPPP(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 23:39,
Reply)
Smashwise Monkee approves (
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 1:19,
Reply)
GAY SEXnot really, VERY GAY SEX
alt: helmreek
(
Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 18:49,
Reply)
Iiiiiit's gay sex gay sex very very gay sex. It's very gay sex(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 19:05,
Reply)
Did you know that 'richard' is gay for 'penus'?(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 20:08,
Reply)
No kinkshaming, please (
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 19:47,
Reply)
Ray Davies wrote 'lola' after getting accidentally bummed off a ladyboy in Thailand(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 19:58,
Reply)
I heard he wanted to write a song about coca cola and just looked for easy rhymes(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 20:31,
Reply)
No, it's because he just found the first letter of the alphabet hilarious for some reason.(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 22 Jun 2026, 20:32,
Reply)
i'm not the world's most passionate guy, lol @ a tho(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 20:39,
Reply)
<s>not</s> <s>u</s> a(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 20:43,
Reply)
The irony is that he had to change the lyric 'coca cola' to 'cherry cola' after the coca cola company complained that he was making their product look gay(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 20:40,
Reply)
No no, the irony thing is something to do with spoons(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 21:37,
Reply)
I ORDERED TOO MANY SPOONSThis wedding is a total disaster
(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Tue 23 Jun 2026, 7:07,
Reply)
^ best at gay sex(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 20:07,
Reply)
"How did you do in the wanking race, darling?""Well I didn't come first, but I held my own."
(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 22 Jun 2026, 21:52,
Reply)
The Romans were rather fond of fellatioA kind of pasta served in a thick creamy sauce.
(
mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 14:09,
Reply)
fucking lovely you mean(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 16:08,
Reply)
you tend to only get the thick creamy sauce at the end thoughbut depending on the chef, maybe some cheese
(, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 14:54, Reply)
I got some from a Jewish restaurant once, the chefs didn't have hats(, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 15:02, Reply)
Man, what a disappointment. You'd have thought Jewish chefs, of all people, could be relied on to wear hats.
(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 22 Jun 2026, 16:07,
Reply)
GET TO DA KIPPAHHH!(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 19:59,
Reply)
top gear? more like 2nd kier amr?!(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 7:42,
Reply)
That's closer to when he should have resigned too...(
Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 10:03,
Reply)
I don't think Trent Reznor ever confirmed what species of animal he had in mind.(, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 8:00, Reply)
I read in an interview that he was thinking of garden snails.(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 22 Jun 2026, 8:15,
Reply)
on a quiet night if you get real close you can actually hear slugs and snails eatingmhmm mhmm mhmmmmm. this is delicious. can you pass the salt please? arrrgh!
(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 12:06,
Reply)
Help me ardds. I've googled he's 9 inch nails. Whatever. Did he die? What's the animal thing? I'll admit I know nothing of his stuff (
mongychops, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 9:40,
Reply)
I think it was a humorous comment, online.Not really your thing, mongs.
(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 22 Jun 2026, 9:59,
Reply)
Definitely not then. I'm a hardcore no funny stuff. It's is funny, that the people who think they are funny have been shit on this forum for years. It's what makes it exciting. It's a switcheroo. Dull policing others. I bet pantseatflyer would love it(
mongychops, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 11:54,
Reply)
If it helps, I don't actually think I'm very funny, either in real life or online. You can just consider my posts on here as my brain vomiting through my fingers.
(
Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 12:23,
Reply)
If in future I consider your posts I'll bear that in mind. (
mongychops, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 13:47,
Reply)
Dearest mongy, Trent Reznor's not dead so far as I know, it was just a pun on his name and orcas.
He did a song about "I want to fuck you like an animal" but he never said which animal so maybe it was a killer whale.
Sorry for the pun and for explaining the joke which obviously makes it worse than it already was.
Yours faithfully,
Aardvark
(
Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 10:23,
Reply)
I'm learning so much. Mainly about how forums change. But it's fascinating. I might stick around (
mongychops, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 12:09,
Reply)
wrote a book called 'close shave', i think(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 10:49,
Reply)
I was going to do a picture of him doing the Crocodile Dundee hand thing with a cowand title it Steer Calmer, but I never got around to it. Too late now.
(, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 13:06, Reply)
There's not any real malice in mine, I'm ashamed to admit. From this distance he does look a bit useless, but they all do. It's like a train, the driver doesn't steer it.
(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 14:38,
Reply)
I think he meant well, he was just useless at being a politician.History may be kinder to him in the long run.
(, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 15:04, Reply)
History is ghostwritten on behalf of the winners(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 16:05,
Reply)
Don't be silly Ghosts can't hold pens
(
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 19:48,
Reply)
eveningapproaching mongy levels of warm this week. hope we've all got hats. i have. i've got three.
(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 20:29,
Reply)
it's the summer equinox.those poor horses!
(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 21:49,
Reply)
solstice you fucking retard(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 21:55,
Reply)
LEAVE ME ALONE!*runs away neighing*
(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 21:56,
Reply)
waking up and neighing up has never been easy(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 23:05,
Reply)
that's when good neighers, become good frieeends(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 23:09,
Reply)
just reminded me of WebCrawlerstill going. set your homepage now
(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 23:56,
Reply)
go to bed you fucking stupid fucking cuntyou're up at 0500
(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 0:11,
Reply)
Are you intentionally outdoing Two Hats?(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sun 21 Jun 2026, 20:41,
Reply)
I'm clammier than an extremely large clam Who has been declared ruler of Clamtown, Miss Clam 2026 and Clam of the Year simultaneously.
(
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 21:05,
Reply)
got to be a pearl in there somewhere(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 21:20,
Reply)
I really liked Blackadders 2-4 when I was young.I'm scared to watch them now, because I fear that I may find them terrible.
(, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 9:21, Reply)
I watched the 1st episode of allo allo the other dayit had all the jokes in that one single episode that sustained the rest of its run. and it was awful.
(, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 12:54, Reply)
Some of the old sitcoms they repeat on BBC4 have held up better than I remembered them originally being,Keeping Up Appearances in particular. Hardly groundbreaking, but written and performed well.
(, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 15:29, Reply)
I think it's held up a lot better than a lot of stuff from around that era.(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 22 Jun 2026, 16:10,
Reply)
Wu Tang Clam ain't nuthin to fuck wit(
mr horrible up yours, dickface, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 23:24,
Reply)
Whooah fat sweaty clamalam(
2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 22 Jun 2026, 19:08,
Reply)
I have two identical hats, if you go on Amazon US and search 'dad hat' you'll see them. I have two because i lost the first one... but then it turned up again!
Honestly, I've got a million stories like this, every one of them true.
(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 23:17,
Reply)
Just out of interest has anyone at Wiki towers ever got their heads around the concept of a "summary" when it comes to summarising a plot?no thought not never mind let's leave it for the time being there's probably no point in changing direction now is there
(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 9:26,
Reply)
HAPPY SOLSTICE EVERYONE (
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 9:27,
Reply)
And Father's day And my sister and brother-in-law's wedding anniversary
(
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 10:17,
Reply)
HAPPY EVERYTHINGS TO EVERYBODY \o/(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 10:20,
Reply)
I do feel unusually happy today (
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 11:31,
Reply)
I've just made a toddler make noises only dogs can hear By telling her about all the sweets I'm going to give her when I take her out in a fortnight
(
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 16:09,
Reply)
you're not a werewolf, right?(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 18:42,
Reply)
I'm allergic to gold, not silver (
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 20:12,
Reply)
mine too- wait! Is Mrs Wizard your sister?
(
Invisible Wizard - 13th Level Scrote, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 13:30,
Reply)
Are you a tall ginger bugger with an incredibly boring job?(
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 14:10,
Reply)
*checks*I'm a middling height badger-haired bugger with a penchant for the arcane arts.
(
Invisible Wizard - 13th Level Scrote, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 15:24,
Reply)
aw- i thought i had made a hooman connection for a centon there
(
Invisible Wizard - 13th Level Scrote, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 19:04,
Reply)
His name is Jeff (
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 20:12,
Reply)
lol summary/summery(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 9:28,
Reply)
ahahahahaha
let's end'em but make it floral-pretty awww
(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 10:10,
Reply)
It's a joke as old as time, I'm sure, but there was a nice cartoon based on it in Private Eye a few months back.(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sun 21 Jun 2026, 10:41,
Reply)
Did you hear about when the cops in Pastryland caught a thief?They put him in a custardy sweet.
(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sun 21 Jun 2026, 10:42,
Reply)
Jokes like this make me helpless with simple delight, like a mentally deficient puppy
(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 10:46,
Reply)
ALSO THIS :)(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 16:54,
Reply)
Is punctuation rationed today?(
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 9:39,
Reply)
everyones a critic(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 9:47,
Reply)
I see what you did there (
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 10:17,
Reply)
it's kidspeak for something well good m8(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 15:10,
Reply)
Fucking Wakis, coming over here, stealing our search engines (
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 20:13,
Reply)
That floating points and pharoah sanders record is just so good tho(, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 19:12, Reply)
Watching Devo at the O2Pretty good. They’re holding up well. Can’t wait for the B-52s tho…
(
garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Sat 20 Jun 2026, 20:38,
Reply)
You'd best try and catch him tomorrow, it's 3 a.m. in Thailand right now.(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sat 20 Jun 2026, 21:00,
Reply)
I'm watching VOn a bit of a nostalgia kick
(
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Sat 20 Jun 2026, 21:33,
Reply)
I got the box set last payday (
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 8:37,
Reply)
i remember watching it on the television back in the, oh when was it? probably like 15 years ago... right? right?Haha i also used to watch minder before bed on a tv in my fucking bedroom.* Lol rich as fuck back in the day eh?
*Black and white with a dial tuner lol
(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Sun 21 Jun 2026, 15:17,
Reply)
That terrified me as a kid
(
garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Sat 20 Jun 2026, 23:29,
Reply)
i presume you never watched W then?(
MiseryCunt i stole your sig and i liked it, Sat 20 Jun 2026, 23:31,
Reply)
next week is supposed to be 35 degrees or more Tues-Frimy boss is considering not trading at all at the markets which would suit me just fine
(
Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sat 20 Jun 2026, 8:58,
Reply)
Is it bull or bear at the moment. Weather in long khot is unreliable. Supposed to be storms, roasting. I'm still trying to go cock fighting. (
mongychops, Sat 20 Jun 2026, 9:10,
Reply)
nobody cares about your fucking stupid fucking khot(
Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sat 20 Jun 2026, 9:28,
Reply)
^ walking around Long Khot looking for cocks(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 20 Jun 2026, 12:40,
Reply)
A sexy, sexy six out of seven you lolloping gang of flumpswww.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c621961qryvo
(
garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 19 Jun 2026, 12:48,
Reply)
wait WhatsApp is exempt?? lolololol
(
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Fri 19 Jun 2026, 13:29,
Reply)
4/7 half a packet of Wotsits but at least they haven't gone soft(
Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Fri 19 Jun 2026, 13:58,
Reply)
*shakes booty**stops after knocking over a cup*
(
Smash Monkey 2 It's Dennis on a smelly minge binge, Fri 19 Jun 2026, 19:51,
Reply)
you ever think about how birds don't chew? (
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 19 Jun 2026, 14:23,
Reply)
150/10 this is high quality posting (
vladimir it's ironic bcs in real life I'm an absolute cunt, Fri 19 Jun 2026, 14:33,
Reply)
Yes — Adam Ant's "Beat My Guest" isn't it, but the one you're thinking of is "Goody Two Shoes"... no wait, let me actually think about this properly rather than guess from fuzzy memory.LET'S BUILD MORE DATA CENTERS TO REALLY GET TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS
(
mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 19 Jun 2026, 19:33,
Reply)
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