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[challenge entry] You should get out more, honey.
I can email you a picture of my operation scar, if you really want me to.

Fuck it! Here you go...

jessicas-swansong.com/keloid-10mos%20post-op-1a.jpg

From the This is how the world will end challenge. See all 373 entries (closed)

(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:08, archived)
# what
flavour of operation?

Edit: well, in that case here is a picture of my only operation scar... from my caesarean. NOTE: owing to the nature of this scar, there is a small amount of hair visible...
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:10, archived)
# My big arse fell off.
And they had to pop it back on. (Upside down)
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:12, archived)
# this is why Im not into the idea of anal sex.
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:14, archived)
# Oh you!
Most men would benifit hugely by being Glittered.

And besides, it fell off due to damp laboratory conditions.
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:15, archived)
# medically speaking
Ive already been glittered by a doctor, and have since learnt 3 things.

1 Pushing a 250 kg weight 100 metres up a hill is a good way to make your insides come out.

2 When the doctors say "this may cause some discomfort" they are being understatedly ironic.

3 Doctors see some pretty mad stuff.
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:21, archived)
# Did you prolapse?
You can have a sedative, you big girl!
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:23, archived)
# sure did.
Only a minor one, but enough to teach me the value of weetabix.
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:25, archived)
# i am so fucking glad
that has never happened to me
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:29, archived)
# Yoda says:
"You will be, you will be!"
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:32, archived)
# I'm so fucking glad that
I don't even know what they're talking about. And no, I don't want some one to explain it to me!
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:33, archived)
# there is plenty of time, if you ignore the following...
man cannot survive off macdonalds alone.
try and supplement your vodka intake with water occasionally.

And finally, dont cycle down to the doctors if you do find yourself in trouble.

(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:34, archived)
# being
married to a doctor, I can vouch for the mad stuff bit. And I always have to shut the dermatology book on the table before I have my breakfast.
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:25, archived)
# Doctors are great at understatement...
I was having a brace fitted years ago and the orthodontist (why do they have flash names!) said this might hurt. I said move your finger then as i bite when i hurt. She didn't and bled and nearly cried, sweet revenge!
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:35, archived)
# wait a minute!
what was the reason you wanted to go to Amsterdam? My memory serves me well.
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:16, archived)
# ah, but that was for scientific reasons.
Could never do it with a class lady : )
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:18, archived)
# Is that because you couldn't take them home to mother?
Knowing you had popped them up the choco echinoderm?
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:20, archived)
# Imagine
the sniggering when the chocolate mousse gets served.
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:22, archived)
# no, more to do with I like a lady who can sit down comfortably.
I think I would do damage.
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:24, archived)
# you'd do damage?
damn, and I only looked at your face... ; )
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:28, archived)
# well, you know for next time now.
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:31, archived)
# don't
encourage me ; )
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:36, archived)
# Im sure you dont need encouraging.
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:37, archived)
# I like Jadeviper...
...she is a size queen!
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:33, archived)
# scientific reasons my arse!




that is not an offer.
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:22, archived)
# Im glad.
Beards dont do it for me.
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:26, archived)
# Were you too posh to push?
Or was it one of those massive 12 pound babies?
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:18, archived)
# after three days in hospital
I finally had a caesarean before we both died. I was seriously ill afterwards, my blood pressure dropped to 60/40 and I was given a blood transfusion. still, it's a nice tidy scar, isn't it? : )
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:26, archived)
# It's no bad.
You ok now Ms Thing?
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:34, archived)
# better
that was 8 months ago... nearly 9
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:37, archived)
# ok maby not.. where is it...
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:10, archived)
# epilepsy
attack!
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:11, archived)
# wooohoooo
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:13, archived)
# A little Escher sketching










(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:33, archived)
# The bastards ...
.. they've stolen your bum cheeks !
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:11, archived)
# Jealous weaklings!
One bit went to J-Lo

The other went to Kylie.
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:12, archived)
# Ahh well ...
... good causes then

Weakling ??? I'll have you know I knocked seven shades of shit out of that bloke from the Mr Muscle ad
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:14, archived)
# a dirty mind
and some nifty photo shopping could alter that image into something most definitely NSFW!!!!
(, Mon 14 Apr 2003, 14:12, archived)