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[challenge entry] Dragons Den ?

From the Sell the Un-sellable challenge. See all 88 entries (closed)

(I helped save b3ta! MaxineBasset Betty Basset Bombs are Better, Thu 28 Nov 2013, 21:52, archived)
# Did you know there is now cheese made from belly button bacteria
I for one fancy a cheese toastie
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! SkUG >_O i got a couple of stitches in my eyeball... ow, Thu 28 Nov 2013, 22:12, archived)
# Kids need to smoke more. It will build up their immune system
I smoked at two and now I am 90 years of age.
(I helped save b3ta! spazzcaptain Misses Valin @, Thu 28 Nov 2013, 22:23, archived)
# the other day I heard a lady at work extolling the virtues of smoking when pregnant
apparently it makes the delivery ever so easy
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 28 Nov 2013, 22:27, archived)
# Fact
Bragged about in chav circles, smoking reduces birth weight.
One of drawbacks, new baby is addicted. Cries for a cig for fist two weeks of life.
(I helped save b3ta! MaxineBasset Betty Basset Bombs are Better, Thu 28 Nov 2013, 22:38, archived)
# it's alright though cos if you smoke loads in the same room or car as your baby for all that time they won't get withdrawal
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 28 Nov 2013, 23:00, archived)
# Old smoking joke:
Boy on a bench, having a smoke. Man walks by and says:

"You know that is bad for you?"

Boy replies: "My grandad lived until he was 100"

Man "And I suppose you are going to tell me he smoked 40 a day?"

Boy: "No; he didn't smoke. But he lived that long because he knew how to mind his own fucking business."

:D
(I helped save b3ta! TheSundaeLunch I'm a fucking shrub, alright?, Thu 28 Nov 2013, 22:40, archived)