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Home » Messageboard » 2005 B3ta Calendar » Message 3764699

[challenge entry] It's shit

/reposted for compo

From the 2005 B3ta Calendar challenge. See all 127 entries (closed)

(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 22:55, archived)
# Toilet
humor
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 22:57, archived)
# know your audience
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 22:57, archived)
# Topical repost
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 22:59, archived)
# AND SITTING DOWN TO PISS IS RIDICULOUS!
if you're a man, anyway.
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 23:01, archived)
# Unless
highly inebriated, or old. (and then you get a nice little bag.)
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 23:01, archived)
# In france...
there were NO SEATS!

And at one point at age 8 I was afraid of the toilet seat for some reason, so I can now piss and shit with not actually sitting on the seat but just above.
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 23:04, archived)
# Which
is an excellent skill to have, I am sure everyone will agree.

Especially in France.
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 23:06, archived)
# In most places there were toilet seats.
Just not in the place I was staying.
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 23:07, archived)
# Oh
so thats the sort of place that you frequent?
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 23:09, archived)
# Only been to adventure scientifique once
Might go again, fun, but next time bring a bit more clothes 'n' a french - english dictionary for I cannot translate everything into french.

Very funny thing over heard in the queue.

1: So is he in your group?
2: No, he is a fu-ck err. (pronounced like that)
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 23:12, archived)
# Did you know in Germany
you're forced to piss sitting down 'cos of the shape of the toilet?

Click for the horrible truth
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 23:10, archived)
# Ha ha!
Pfffffft!
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 23:12, archived)
# Ah
that's what I was talking about, yes.

It's UNNATURAL*!


*
adj 1: not in accordance with or determined by nature; contrary to
nature; "an unnatural death"; "the child's unnatural
interest in death" [ant: {natural}]
2: speaking or behaving in an artificial way to make an
impression [syn: {affected}] [ant: {unaffected}]
3: distorted and unnatural in shape or size; abnormal and
hideous; "tales of grotesque serpents eight fathoms long
that churned the seas"; "twisted into monstrous shapes"
[syn: {grotesque}, {monstrous}]


(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 23:14, archived)
# You have
spent longer on this subject than I did!

Yeah I went to Germany a few years ago, you remember after you have had wet shins a few times.
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 23:15, archived)
# As if you piss in the toilet in Germany.
Straight in the fucking sink.
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 23:28, archived)
# True
But it is unplesant to fall down said loo because the seat is up
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 23:01, archived)
# Aaah
now you see, my arse is too wide for that to be an issue.
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 23:03, archived)
# hahaa!
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 23:03, archived)
# There were no seats in the ladies toilets
Very annoying.
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 23:05, archived)
# Then
put it down!

I should charge for this kind of advice...

$10 please or £1 in real money.
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 23:05, archived)
# that's tough to do
if you're a tiny goblin
(, Tue 28 Sep 2004, 23:11, archived)