So fat, her blood type was Dolmio.....
A company I used to work for in sunny Blackpool decided to employ this fucking massive scale busting whale to run the Shipping Department.

Now this girl wasnt massive, she was just fucking insanly obese. She had her own timezones she was that wide. It didnt help with the fucking 3square foot of Dairy Milk she used to shovel down her grid every day.

However, she had THE worst personal hygeine regime ever, she smelt like death. And I mean death, if she came near you, you would heave, her clothes were disgusting and covered in stains.

Anyway after months of this rank jam steamer wobbling about, she got pulled up by management and told to get herself sorted. She proper saw her arse over it, and just turned into the company cunt. Nasty with every one, as if the whole world owed her a diet. After 2 months of this she left. But she made every ones life hell on earth.

2 days after leaving she died of a heart attack at her house.

PMSL YOU HUMAN LAND SLUG
(hoogie Original Cunt Horse Author, Fri 25 Jan 2008, 12:35, 5 replies)

well at least there was a happy ending
...
( @><|= w0nu!) or cunt to my friends, Fri 25 Jan 2008, 12:55, closed)

Seems a bit harsh!
A woman with very obvious self esteem issues leaves and dies of a heart attack. This is funny?

With my writing hat on, the very least you could do is elaborate on the things she did to cause you anguish, your metaphors are good, if a little cliched, perhaps there is a story waiting to get out?

As a member of the human race I find the fact that you find it amusing that someone dies overweight, unhappy and alone deeply disturbing.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Sat 26 Jan 2008, 20:28, closed)

PJM
Happiness and loneliness may be beyond someone's control, but what they put into their mouths isn't.

Technically, I'd say she committed suicide.
(Musuko, Tue 29 Jan 2008, 14:23, closed)

Very true
However, self esteem issues and eating disorders go together like Tory MPs and cottaging.

She may have been an unpleasant individual but the story leaves me feeling a tad sorry for her.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 30 Jan 2008, 13:15, closed)

Very true
However, self esteem issues and eating disorders go together like Tory MPs and cottaging.

She may have been an unpleasant individual but the story leaves me feeling a tad sorry for her.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 30 Jan 2008, 13:15, closed)