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This is a question Beautiful but Bonkers

I used to see this girl from time to time. Face of an angel, body of a goddess, great in bed. The only downside was her emotional state. When she wasn't crying, she was screaming. Violence was never far from the agenda, and I finally called it quits when she sat down in the middle of a busy street, drunker than I thought possible, howling like a banshee and swearing at passers-by.

What kind of lunacy have you put up with in the name of lust?

(, Fri 17 Nov 2006, 13:31)
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Not me,
but a friend of mine. He seems to have a knack of finding them. They're all good lookers, but all a bit bonkers (although they'd probably have to be to be with him!).

Funniest bonkers moment would have to be when we were all out in the pub, just having some beers on a friday after work. At this time, I was due to get married in about three months time or so and she asked me what we were doing for a stag night.

"We're having a stag weekend, not a stag night" says I.

"Where are you going then?" she asks.

"We going to Amsterdam and I'm gonna get me a hooker" says I.

A look of horror spread slowly accross her face.

"You're not serious are you" she asked, shocked.

"Of course I am" says I, winking at my mate, her fella.

She turns to her bloke and tells him in no uncertain terms that he is not coming with me.

"If you went to Amsterdam with him you'd wake up in the morning with some dirty tart next to you!" she shouts as he tries to pursuade her he should go.

"Oh, come on" says he " I'm more of a man than that!"

She starts to calm down until he follows with:

"I'd wake up with two!"

God bless him, everyone laughed. It was a funny line and he delivered it well. The whole conversation was obviously a joke from the start but she didn't seem to understand. She was convinced we were serious and warned me she'd tell my fiance what I'd been saying.* Que tears and toilet for at least half an hour while we all stand around trying to figure out what just happened. I thought it was hilarious, but there's only so much madness you can take and she had to go.

* The missus got used to the Amsterdam and hooker stag do joke and used to play along. She knows what I;'m like and has a sense of humour too.

On the tit size question, any more than a handful is a waste. My wife used to be a gymnast and has a very thin, taught, toned, firm, flexible figure with smallish breasts* which are pert and soft. This is how I like them.

* It was at this point that I came in my left hand while typing with my right. I do hope this adds a new dimension to what you have just read. I feel dirty, but that's not necessarily a bad thing...
(, Thu 23 Nov 2006, 15:30, Reply)

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