Actual confession
Every Thursday morning Concepta comes around to do the housekeeping. Nothing unusual there for a bachelor such as myself. But I don't tell her that Agnieska comes around every Monday morning to do it again, after the weekend. Again, nothing mental there either - I need two housekeepers to clean up after me, and both are oblivious to each other, as I am somewhat embarrassed to let them know that I make enough filth for the house to warrant cleaning twice a week.

The confession? Neither of them know that the reason the drain keeps blocking isn't because of the 'Victorian plumbing', but because I occasionally take a poo in the shower.

Length? Well, it almost felt as good getting that confession out as it does shitting myself up in the shower.
(Clerk T Hazarde are all the wine, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 13:47, 8 replies)

You shit in your own shower?
And might have to wait 4 days for someone to clean it up?
(Smale is stuffed, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 14:37, closed)

It's mostly scuthery stuff, so I can rinse it down. But it clogs up further down the pipes
(Clerk T Hazarde are all the wine, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 14:49, closed)

Do you push the lumps through the plughole with your toes?

( Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 14:38, closed)

Of course! that's almost my favourite bit! but then it's all gone and the fun is over
(Clerk T Hazarde are all the wine, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 14:51, closed)

An activity referred to as 'Wafflestomping', I believe.

( IHaveABadFeelingAboutThis most likely working from home on, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 16:46, closed)

Strangely enough, I think that may have ruined waffles for me
(Clerk T Hazarde are all the wine, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 19:02, closed)

If you shit in the shower
it's no wonder you need two cleaners.
(rampants, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 17:23, closed)

No shit!
(Clerk T Hazarde are all the wine, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 19:10, closed)