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This is a question The B3ta Cookbook

We're bored of beans on toast. Pretend you're on Pinterest and share your cooking tips and recipes. Can't cook? Don't let that stop you telling us about the disastrous shit you've made.

(, Thu 28 Jun 2012, 21:56)
Pages: Popular, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1

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fixed that for you:
WOMEN: How to woo your future husband:

1) Invite object of affection to local inn or hostelry. Consume own weight in Dry Blackthorn.
2) Stumble home in state of advanced refreshment, with equally unsteady companion in tow, pausing briefly to urinate in council grit bin.
3) Upon arriving home, open freezer and conduct following inventory: 1 x 700ml bottle supermarket brand vodka, 1 x 48 pack supermarket brand fish fingers.
4) Grill entire box of fish fingers until charcoal on one side, still frozen on other. Facilitate this process using vodka as required.
5) Descend on pile of fish fingers like biblical plague of locusts. Consume entire pack in almost complete silence. Do not under any circumstances pause to consider likely constituents, origins or genetic make-up of home brand fish fingers. Complement with last dregs of vodka.
6) Retire to boudoir, leaving grill on. Attempt bestial congress. Lose consciousness.
(, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 8:29, Reply)

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