Frenchie and the bruised ego
I had a good friend during high school whose dad was a doctor and his mother was an oil heiress. They divorced and he and his dad lived in a modest apartment. He never wanted for anything, but was also never showy. He did belong to a country club, when that was not so ubiquitous as it is now.

Well, one day he tells me that his dad wants him to go visit the place they used to live, a few hours drive away. He begs me to go with him because he does not want to be stuck with all these stodgy old types. I readily agree, and we set off on a road trip in his dad's Mercedes.

Little did I know we would be staying near this HUGE country club, with golf, tennis, pool, etc. facilities. I could order anything I want because he had "a tab". I was in heaven. Then we met the girls.

One was a cute blonde that had everything going for her and knew it - almost a sexual intensity with life. The other was her exchange student friend from France, who was good looking and did not always wear a bra.

We went out to eat, then went back to where we were staying and had some liquids and some herbal medicine. My friend and the other girl disappeared to somewhere, leaving me alone. I tried some chit chat, some high school French, but she didn't seem very receptive, in fact she seemed a bit upset.

Not one to let an opportunity pass, I sat down on the bed beside her, started talking in a low voice, but still no real reaction. Then, I figured, "she hasn't run away yet", so I leaned over for a kiss, placed my hand on the room service tray, which flung china, cutlery, a couple of glasses and a steel pitcher across both of us and onto the floor with a noise that could have awakened the dead.

That was it. We spent the next hour or so, she on the bed looking upset (still) and me with my back to the wall, about 10 feet from her, reading my friend's magazine.

All my friend could say on the ride back was, "what the hell is wrong with you?"
( BrokenCoccyx doesn't mind if you grope on, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 15:35, 9 replies)

If you were Allisade, she'd have been begging you
to school her in the ways of love. In French.
You should ask him how he does it.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:12, closed)

I made up for it a few years later when I lived in Paris.
And Allisade is a liar.
( BrokenCoccyx doesn't mind if you grope on, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:37, closed)

Why would she be begging? I would have happily provided =)

But hey - if flinging cutlery is what you prefer, that's cool too.

To each their own =)
( Allisade would love to hear from you, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 17:21, closed)

The cutlery was needed to cut the tension with a knife.
We sat there, 10 feet from each other, pretending the other did not exist. Well, I knew she existed, I just had no chance.
( BrokenCoccyx doesn't mind if you grope on, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 17:25, closed)

Ha ha ha. Virgin.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 18:11, closed)

[sympathetic reply]

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 18:56, closed)

Only joking.
You failure. What the hell sort of emo catastrophe can't persuade an exchange student into deviant congress?
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 18:57, closed)

Well, someone has to be the one in the "9 out of 10" scenarios.

( BrokenCoccyx doesn't mind if you grope on, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 22:08, closed)

Five points for rendering devoted service to statistics.
Bravo.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 11 Jul 2012, 16:10, closed)