I was so disappointed I could have scalped myself.
I honestly remember the first time I was disappointed. I was four years old and I had recently started school. The first thing we learnt about was Red Indians. I appreciate that I should refer to them as “Native Americans” or “Indigenous tribes people” but this was 1981, we still had Golliwogs as acceptable brand logos and I want to keep things authentic for the purpose of this anecdote.

To say I took an avid interest in Red Indians would be an understatement, I absolutely loved them and I desperately wanted to be one. I devoured everything I was taught about them. I didn’t know the alphabet but I knew a dozen or so Indian words and hand signals, I knew the best way to sneak up on a buffalo, how to kill it and what all the bits could be used for. I would avidly watch westerns and cheer on the Indians and boo the cowboys, I would constantly ask my confused parents if I could be a Red Indian when I grew up and I shot my brother in the arse with a home made bow & arrow. Things were good.

Then things got better. The teacher announced to the class that we would be taken to a wild west show. For a week I could barely contain my excitement, I knew what it was going to be like, there would be hundreds of whooping Indians on horseback charging around a bunch of cowboys who had circled their wagons, I would be dodging stray arrows and if I was lucky I could join in. I couldn’t wait.

The day finally arrived. We were taken to the village hall, I thought the venue was a bit small for a tribe of Indians on the warpath but I didn’t care, it would just mean I was closer to the action. We filed into the hall and sat in rows cross-legged on the floor, no Indians yet but I was in the front row to get the best view, any minute now they would come charging out…

…And a middle-aged couple dressed in Red Indian costumes gave a half hour lecture on native North American culture. Disappointed much? Lets just say they were lucky I didn’t have my tomahawk with me.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 15:49, 3 replies)

ironically
Over here, sitting cross-legged is traditionally referred to as 'sitting indian style'!

So you were already morphing into a Native American!

I shared a similar interest, but with British Revolutionary War soldiers. Not in a 'gay' way, but I was fascinated with their bearskin caps and their bright red uniforms. At the Bicentennial I was 7 years old (that would be the Bicentennial of our Declaration of Independence from you lot back in 1776) and when the reenactment began, and the redcoats took the field, I was brimming with Pride at "my team!" I was 7. My Brother, at 13 elected his team to be the Americans.

When the redcoats started falling I was devastated! I remember crying. I literally CRIED because all the redcoats died.
( Citadel Because the world needs less morons, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 15:59, closed)

I knew that but couldnt get it into the anecdote
I remember being taught that the men sat crossed-leg and women sat on the side of their arse with their legs out to the side (like if you were nealt down and slumped to the side). Part of me still wants to be a "native american indian", but I think i'm at leat 100 years too late.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 16:05, closed)

You know
There IS a solution! There is this guy, Tom Brown. He has written tons of books on native woodcraft (no, not hand carved cuddly wood bears - stalking, tracking, hunting, etc).

he has these classes in the New Jersey Pine Barrens and you can learn all kinds of cool stuff. I've always been fascinated by native culture as well, so I took a couple of these. AMAZING guy.

He is not Native American, but his 'Grandfather' (his native american buddies grandfather) adopted him (as was popular in native cultures throughout history) and taught him 'the old ways'. VERY cool.

www.trackerschool.com/

So why not plan a holiday over here and take one of his courses? The Native culture isnt about being 'red' it's about being ONE with the surrounding nature and understanding one's place in that wilderness. He's a brilliant guy.
( Citadel Because the world needs less morons, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 16:48, closed)