Sweet old lady
my friend's mum...

When we went to stay in her big old house (which used to be a bed and breakfast) she handed us each a type-written list of houserules. I wish I still had it. I can only remember:

Do not climb out of the window. The drainpipe is unsafe and you may break it.
Urinating on my aspidistra will not be tolerated.
Upon bringing back guests, sharing them is compulsory.
Parties may be held, but only if I am invited.

We went for lunch in a cafe on the promenade - me, my friend, my friend's small son and daughter, and her mum.
The old lady was trying to wind up my friend, so she kicked her under the table. Quick as a flash her mum wrenched her boot from her foot and flung it gaily across the crowded room. It hit a lady who swiftly got up and moved to another table as far away as possible.

On the same occasion she insisted that I stop addressing her as Mrs Robinson and call her Aunty Emma. "But I don't feel I know you well enough!" I protested.
She leaned in and whispered conspiratorially "you can call me shitface if you like".
My face registered surprise, but not as much as when seconds later she shouted gleefully to all assembled, "she just called me shitface!"

She gave me two crystal bowls, which I tried very hard to refuse. She grew offended and insisted I take them... When we left my friend remarked "she likes you".
"What makes you say that?" I asked.
"Those bowls were her treasured wedding gifts, she's had them for fifty years" she said.
I've still got them. What the fuck am I supposed to do with them?!
( warmfuzzies Isn't here, Wed 5 Nov 2008, 3:14, 11 replies)

Re: The Two Crystal Bowls....
What the fuck are you supposed to do with them?

Fill 'em with compost, plant aspidistras in them and then piss in them. It's the only way to break the curse...
(apologies_for_length, Wed 5 Nov 2008, 6:51, closed)

smash them to piecies
It's what she would have wanted
( buffet_the_appetite_slayer ٩(●̮̃•)۶ jacked in to the ICE on, Wed 5 Nov 2008, 8:05, closed)

hmm
make a very uncomfortable crystal bowl bra out of them?
(Halfy By light alone, Wed 5 Nov 2008, 8:17, closed)

^
Sell them for crack?
( Rookie You'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel, Wed 5 Nov 2008, 8:29, closed)

glue them together
expensive hamster ball
(kebabking - salad and garlic mayo pls, Wed 5 Nov 2008, 9:33, closed)

sorry to be sensible..
but if you don't want them, take them to an antique shop and sell them for whatever they offer.

Personally, I think the fact she gave you one of her most prized possessions is rather touching and the fact that you have zero appreciation either for the gesture or for the sentimental value those bowls would have had for her is not a particularly good comment about you, I'm afraid.

I've had a lot of crap I didn't want given to me over the years, but it meant something to the person who gave it to me and, if I really didn't want it or have room to store it, I just took it to a junk shop (away from where the person who gave the item to me might wander in and see it on sale) and sold them. You might be surprised how much a decent pair of cristal bowls can be worth, but also the old lady seemed genial, kind and good fun - why disrespect her kindness?
(Chad, Wed 5 Nov 2008, 11:31, closed)

If I'm right in guessing the lady in question is fairly advanced in years, then it's entirely possible that she's finding good homes for her treasured posessions before death finds her.

That she wanted you to have something so dear to her suggests that a: she really does like you and b: you should take good care of them.
(Musuko, Wed 5 Nov 2008, 17:13, closed)

I didn't refuse them because I didn't want them
I refused them because I felt it may not be appropriate for me to have them. I'd only just met her and as I was with her daughter and other members of her family (to whom she offered nothing) I felt awkward.

Of course I appreciated her kindness, I was extremely touched and I said so. I wasn't rude or thoughtless about it. I just felt it may have been too big a gesture, and that if she was perhaps going slightly senile I would feel wrong about accepting gifts she wouldn't have normally offered me.
( warmfuzzies Isn't here, Wed 5 Nov 2008, 17:30, closed)

It could be...
...that she felt you more deserving than they. You can't choose your family, but you can choose not to let them get their ungrateful mitts on an undeserved inheritance.

Also, some people have a knack; of sizing up people they've just met with uncanny accuracy. I can know people for years, but still not figure what makes them tick. On the other hand, I know people capable of instant telepathic-grade character analysis.

Perhaps she was planning to move into a residential care facility, and couldn't take them with her.

There's any number of possible reasons, but she sounds like she was of sound mind (mere playfulness does not correlate to mental incapacity); and they were hers to do with as she wished. So, you now have something really nice to remember her by. And finally, in my experience, it's only those who *don't* question such events, that are undeserving to receive them.
(The Incredible Sulk Finally remembered his password on, Thu 6 Nov 2008, 6:26, closed)

Oh man,
THIS is the kind of little old lady I want to be!
(TDub Nunc id vides, nunc ne vides on, Wed 5 Nov 2008, 13:41, closed)

Hee hee
"She just called me shitface"

That's ace.
( Moey, Wed 5 Nov 2008, 16:23, closed)