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This is a question I Hurt My Rude Bits, Again

My commute to work was made excellent the other day when I saw a motorcyclist try to ride on the pavement to avoid a traffic queue, lose control, fall off and land bollock-first on a concrete bollard. He was fine, eventually – but tell us your tales of the old blinding agony to the gentleman's or gentlewoman's area.

(I helped save b3ta! Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 7 Mar 2013, 12:50)
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I have told tale of my mate Tom previously in this weeks qotw.
Here is another. He'll like this one being aired even less than the last. Maybe he'll learn not to drink and talk with me in the future.

Tom went to a strict Christian Brothers boarding school.
Once every few nights the head brother would line the boys up in the showers with some "pr0nos" and a ruler.
They would have to drop their towels, the brother would hold an open stickbook in front of them for a few minutes and then do his thing.

Now I know where most of you are going with you thinking here - I reached for the same conclusion.
But.

Apparently if you cracked a chubby looking at the rudey mag, rather than play with your cock or at least measure it the brother would give your penis a short, sharp whack on the top of your dick and then as quickly on the underside of your nadgers.

Apparently getting whacked on the dick with a ruler really fucking hurts. And then as you yelp in pain and try to cover up, a less than gentle flick on your "landing gear" makes insult to injury a reality.

Now from what I understand from Tom, a couple of these brothers have since been dispatched to the big house because the government, school and eventually the church found that type of behavior to be "unbecoming".

Rather than a "length" joke I'll name the source for the "pr0no" that the brother used to hold up.
Madonna's original spread in Playboy.(Suffice to say - NSFW)

Go figure...
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Thu 14 Mar 2013, 4:59, 4 replies)
Please keep your seedy porn links to yourself.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 14 Mar 2013, 7:03, closed)
this is bollocks and you are shit.

(I helped save b3ta! janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Thu 14 Mar 2013, 8:36, closed)
Unfair, janet.
The sexual abuse of children is proper lol.
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 14 Mar 2013, 9:47, closed)
Just ask your local Catholic priest.

(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Thu 14 Mar 2013, 10:34, closed)

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