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This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Pages: Latest, 836, 835, 834, 833, 832, ... 1

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Girls thread is for girls
Gender stereotypes
I hate football (all sport in fact), I'm not in the slightest bit interested in cars, I don't do DIY and I've never been in a fight.
I do all the cooking and washing in our house and I am great with kids.
Yet, as b3th pointed out* in the previous thread, I am as resoundingly heterosexual as you benders are likely to see.
Do you conform to any gender stereotypes?

Alt: Why are you all such massive benders?


*Sort of

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 13:55, 212 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
I HAVE A BEARD

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:04, Reply)
SO DO I!!!!

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:05, Reply)
I have a moustache, and not in a village people way either .

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:06, Reply)
Is it ironic?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:16, Reply)
will it blend?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:17, Reply)
Alright Alanis.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:19, Reply)
HI JEFF
*waves 10,000 spoons*
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:21, Reply)
*unzips fly*
*dangles in chardonnay*
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:36, Reply)
This thread is shit

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:06, Reply)
Only true benders listen to what girls have got to say.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:06, Reply)

Alt. Because every time I fuck your mum she gives me an Erasure CD.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:06, Reply)
I blame my dad for shitting in her cunt

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:07, Reply)
I thought of a really good YM joke earlier
but I've forgotten it.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:13, Reply)
Was it as good as Jeff's?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:15, Reply)
Unlikely I'd say
I'm brilliant.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:18, Reply)
You really are

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:18, Reply)
i'm in a similar vein myself
though i retain a few essential man rights.
firstly: the right to roar like a sleepy bear when waking, and do one of those grade-a starfish stretches, turfing anything else on the bed including the duvet into the corner/onto the floor.

secondly: the right to follow this by simultaneously pissing loud and long with the door open, and unleashing a window-rattler of a fart, while going 'AAAhhhhhh' like a man in a strongbow advert.

thirdly: the right to demand bacon in unreasonable quantities at any given time

fourthly: the right to grab my girl's ass as and when i see fit.

i still do all the laundry, dishes, tidying, make the lunches etc mind.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:13, Reply)
I like sport, I do DIY, I like cooking and am excellent with my daughter
really I'm the perfect package.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:15, Reply)
Gay

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:16, Reply)
You wish

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:17, Reply)
You are also the envy of your friends with your flooring choice

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:18, Reply)
not really, none of my friends are filthy povvos with lino floors

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:19, Reply)
It's the field of one upmanship, have you got engineered boards for example, piss off then you tramp
If they've got american red oak, then your white oak is just not gonna cut it anymore
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:22, Reply)
I use reconditioned railway sleepers
because they're sustainable and they add to the ambiance*

*I said that in a french accent obviously
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:38, Reply)
Are you suggesting that we didn't read it in a French accent?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:39, Reply)
That was specifically for the povz

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:41, Reply)
Why do headlines used "quizzed"
"Rugby Star Quizzed over sex assault"
Q1: What is the legal definition of assault
Q2: If a woman was 2 1/3rd miles from home and walking at a speed of 2 mph, how long will she be alone
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:17, Reply)
Q1: More than 3 fingers
Q2: until I find her
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:18, Reply)

Hahagayha
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:14, Reply)
the real answer is because you are reading shit publications

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:20, Reply)
The bbc?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:31, Reply)
their standards have slipped alarmingly

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:40, Reply)
I've wondered that myself. It makes it sound as though there are prizes.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:21, Reply)
It probably refers to a rape
But until they formally charge him they will not release the details.
Your second question does not make sense.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:29, Reply)
I am the perfect man
according to January 1957's issue of Good Little Housewife magazine.

Unfortunately, times have changed.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:19, Reply)
probably why she dumped you ;)

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:20, Reply)
I doubt it
they all love it secretly.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:21, Reply)
Threadjack as no one is really responding
I have posted on average 13 times a day, what's your average?
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:27, Reply)
Christ you are bored

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:30, Reply)

ed ing
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:30, Reply)
yes very, i'm waiting for something so i can fuck off

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:30, Reply)
Thirty minutes to go, here.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:30, Reply)
yeah me too, at a cleint so can fuck off whenever really
once someone has emailed me!!
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:31, Reply)
a million and 4

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:30, Reply)
sounds about right

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:30, Reply)
there's nothing right about it, mate

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:31, Reply)
this is true
but it's why we love/hate you
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:32, Reply)

love (I hope)
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:36, Reply)
I don't "do" stats for free.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:31, Reply)
Dire Straights less...

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:33, Reply)
Goddam it!
I been zunged
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:34, Reply)
It's almost like you're both unoriginal and repetetive?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:35, Reply)
It's almost like we're both unoriginal and repetative?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:35, Reply)
are you both unoriginal and repetotive?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:40, Reply)
Does someone want to spell this with an "i" and then a "u" to complete the set?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:41, Reply)
I just copied and pasted so this means Chompy has changed his post

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:43, Reply)
and yet it's STILL wrong
rob should instal a spelling filter

didn't there used to be a swear filter that changed cunt to cranberry, for example? whatever happened to that?
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:49, Reply)
Don't talk about me or reply to me you utter psycho.
I had you on ignore for over a year and still you think its necessary to snipe at me. Grow up, it's pathetic.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:27, Reply)
the I should go last as it's the correct spelling

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:43, Reply)
Dire Straits less successful etc...

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:33, Reply)
I can't work mine out

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:33, Reply)
Actually that is not true
My second ever post mentions how long my account was inactive for, so I could. I can't be bothered to though.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:38, Reply)
Fuck me, I've nearly posted 20,000 times on here

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:35, Reply)
19,999 of which were shit

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:36, Reply)
22k for me....

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:37, Reply)
42,000 shit posts
*high fives*
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:38, Reply)
Just under 9 posts per day for me
However, remove the 2 1/2 year gap, and it goes up to 14 per day
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:48, Reply)
How did that stupid tart from ndubz expect to ever get away with claiming her sextape was a fake
it's fucking terrible as well
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:32, Reply)
I haven't seen it, I'm not that bothered
she did a vlog about it on youtube the other day, I got bored after 30seconds, didn't even have a wank.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:33, Reply)
Sickrick posted a link earlier
Whtevs wil de dublettes fink !!1??!1!
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:38, Reply)
I think it'll affect her family the most,
What must her parents think, let alone her grandad and Na-na-naaaaaa
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:40, Reply)
I'm wasted on you cunts.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:45, Reply)
Is is some kind of "music" joke?
You're good at them
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:46, Reply)
N-Dubz always seem to have a Naaa-naaaa-naaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh
bit in their songs, you old cunt.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:47, Reply)
It's na na naii.
I can tell from the pixels and having heard many N-Dubz songs before.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:48, Reply)
Where is Kristine to solve this query?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:51, Reply)
It is CLEARLY na na naiii.
I sincerely hope someone will back me up on this.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:56, Reply)
:D

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:56, Reply)
I clicked your joke but I'm not one of those insipid people who go "*clickies!!*" when they do.
Hope that makes you feel better.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:59, Reply)
I clicked your pixles post because I leik de memes
this makes us even!
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:00, Reply)
What's Dappy's favourite film?
Na-Na-Knight Rider.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:48, Reply)
i don't get it?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:50, Reply)
Is she still using the baby as an excuse?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:52, Reply)
Baby?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:56, Reply)
Mrs Ape, not you.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:00, Reply)
Look there
b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1570697

But replace the last naah with naiii
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:56, Reply)
Maybe she mimed on the tape.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:34, Reply)
She seemed to be just opening and closing her mouth, so maybe

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:36, Reply)
I haven't seen it although I believe it only involves a blowjob
no flange or tits
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:37, Reply)
I NO RITE
At the very least we could have seen some N-Ipples
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:37, Reply)
i liked the sickipedia joke
i heard Tulisa's blowjobs are like an N-Dubz gig

Nobody comes
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:37, Reply)
this is one of those news stories
that i have seen and ignored for not giving a fuck who the silly tart is. people who watch reality tv* and read stories about reality tv stars should have their corneas donated to other people who will put them to better use.


* may exclude "america's next top model". terms and conditions apply.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:40, Reply)
true... but
the only good thing about reality tv is that eventually you get so used to them popping up everywhere, that they start to feel like someone you know... which means it's 10 time better when you find their sex tape on the internet
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:20, Reply)
the story behind the story is the best part
trim out the bits about tulisa moaning, and what you get is this:

dappy has threesomes, spends majority of time checking out his mate's hog.

dappy then turns to twitter to tell them the penis in question is DEFINITELY his mate's. aforementioned penis being in the sextape FEATURING HIS COUSIN AND BEST FRIEND.

turns out he was wrong, it wasn't even his mate's wang. so now his best mate is pissed x revulsed, his cousin is pissed x revulsed, and he's basically shot himself in the foot for ever having a threesome again. the loathsome little bellend. on the upside, it pretty much means no more n-dubz..
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:49, Reply)
At the risk of conforming to a gender stereotype
...take a minute to sign the following and hopefully save my favourite pub.
www.gopetition.com/petitions/wenlock-action.html
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:38, Reply)
no thanks

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:39, Reply)
Oh christ, you're probably the developer, aren't you?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:43, Reply)
imagine a world where this could be true

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:44, Reply)
To be honest, given the number of times b3ta has coincided with my real life,
I wouldn't rule it out.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:46, Reply)
they might be clients of ours, what's the developer called?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:46, Reply)
big mac plc
and fries with that limited?
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:48, Reply)
lol

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:48, Reply)
they're not serving under 18s in McDonald's anymore :(

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:49, Reply)
that's so stupid
fat kids can get fat anywhere.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:53, Reply)
oh sorry the s in 18s stood for Stone

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:08, Reply)
will you buy us all a drink in there if we do?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:40, Reply)
No.
Edit: well, it depends how broadly you define "all of us." I might be able to stretch to a glass of white for you, and Stunned will only need a half of shandy...
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:43, Reply)
i am easily bought
excellent
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:47, Reply)
Thats a toilet
graffiti tag line if ever I saw one
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:48, Reply)
I'll need a pint of ale please
Also, just so you know, I doubtyour petition will work, no one gives a shit about petitions
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:48, Reply)
You can't stop progress!

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:41, Reply)
You'll grow to love the nice shiny new flats

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:41, Reply)

flats floors
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:59, Reply)
why not just send aturd in the post like everybody else?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:41, Reply)
I don't see how posting a turd to my favourite pub is going to help...

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:43, Reply)
Kroney will visit

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:44, Reply)
Now I imagine Kroney in some sort of crap superhero get-up
Making a dramatic entrance during the quiet, mid-afternoon lull and declaring,
"I heard a bot-dog had arrived here."
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:48, Reply)
This^

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:49, Reply)
I'm going RIGHT to the mods.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:54, Reply)
Just a thought
But if the developers are buying the premises as a going concern then I believe they have to run the place for at least 2 years before they can apply for a change of purpose on the property. If enough people add this to the council planning application it can force the application to be refused...


(obviously I know nothing about the application that has been put in)
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:47, Reply)
This is no place for helpful answers

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:48, Reply)
Sorry
Deletes account... etc etc
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:50, Reply)
From what I've heard
(and it's all 2nd-hand, admittedly), the developers apparently plan to buy it from the management and run it into the ground, so that by the time they're allowed to apply for changes, nobody will give a shit.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:50, Reply)
but as long as you are all still drinking in there
the change of use will be refused as it is a viable business...
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:51, Reply)
They could stop the bar being "gay friendly"

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:55, Reply)
Appletinis all round then

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:57, Reply)
This definitely sounds like an internet answer
Oh internet why are you so fucking stupid?
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:56, Reply)
I'd like an internet answer on a few things
say I start a buisness about research into waste, can I buy all my food and count it as a buisness expense because I'm going to use that waste to do "research" on.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:58, Reply)
Business expences are brilliant, play your cards right *wink wink* and all your outgoings can be shoehorned in as expenses
*disclaimer* dependant on solid accountancy advise and the nature of the enterprise that you're running
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:02, Reply)
because everything that gets posted on it was learned from it
and theoretical experience makes you an EXPERT.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:00, Reply)
Where is BGB and her infamous book?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:03, Reply)
oop north innit

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:05, Reply)
One day the psychiatrists might give her the internet back

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:07, Reply)
the internet is nobody's to give away
nobody would want it
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:18, Reply)
I hope they turn it into a Apple store where the only booze they sale comes in neon colours.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:53, Reply)
you should call yourself tangledupinpink

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:39, Reply)
I hardly think you are qualified to comment on what constitutes heterosexual behaviour in a man.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:48, Reply)
"but why will you only do me up the shitter? I have a lovely foofoo here!"

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:49, Reply)
I bet you do, Apey

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:50, Reply)
i really do
*rubs self*
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:51, Reply)
*thinks about male b3tans she has met*
*agrees*
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:50, Reply)
Fuck off
I'm well strong and tuff.

Edit: Although, admittedly, Stunned is so girly he could well cancel me out.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:54, Reply)
You are the Milky Bar Kid AICMFP

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:56, Reply)
Funny you should say that.
I have been compared to him before. Although I'm darker an hairier and less likely to wear a cowboy hat, or carry around Milkybars.

I have glasses, basically.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:57, Reply)

less more
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:59, Reply)
haha
since he got glasses, there is an uncanny resemblance
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:57, Reply)
Oh fuck you.
It wasn't even you what said it previous.

Incidentally, "milkybar" is Indian slang for a white person. Just dropping my multiculturalism in there.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:59, Reply)
doesn't mean i can't laugh at it
sorry, you.

am having a big argument with the past times' administration. has the one in uxbridge gone?
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:04, Reply)
Yeah, I saw it was having a closing down sale a while ago.
Must have gone by now.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:08, Reply)
if more people like you had shopped in there
it wouldn't have gone under.

and i would be having a less stressful friday!
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:17, Reply)
People like me?
What would I do with a monogrammed ink stamp or a union jack teapot cosy?

I'm glad that shop went under, it was fucking shit.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:18, Reply)
A tea cosy has only one purpose
Headgear
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:21, Reply)
bit late but
Rebel MC's lesser know yadda yadda
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:32, Reply)
I'm dating a gay man and I'm a girl.
Alt: His gayness tends to rub off a bit.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:57, Reply)
now you know i love you both
but i don't want to hear about your sex-life, mm-kay?
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 14:58, Reply)
How dare you insinuate we might do something as base as that?!
Our love is pure and virginal.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:01, Reply)
i know you
therefore i know this is bigger hairier bollocks than quentin's helicopter, bella's blog, roger's fiancee, edmund's medical degree, psycho's "buisness" (sic) and bert's existence combined!!
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:03, Reply)
*raises eyebrow*
Therefore I am beginning to wonder what you know...
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:05, Reply)
ach it's friday afternoon
i am yelling at administrators down the phone and drafting termination notices with the other hand. don't expect much i say to make sense!
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:06, Reply)
I'm hitting my head against the table in the Maughan trying to shit out 3000 words in about 2 hours.
I feel your pain.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:08, Reply)
*waves through window*

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:17, Reply)
With your third hand?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:19, Reply)
with my headdobber
clearly
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:25, Reply)
She's saying that your missus is dirtier than a Cornish tin miner's sock.
I am not passing judgement, she could well have cast iron knickers for all I know.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:09, Reply)
I have breasts.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:11, Reply)
*high five*

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:12, Reply)
So do I.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:13, Reply)
Who did you steal them from?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:14, Reply)
Weeeeell
it's more of a timeshare situation, really
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:18, Reply)
And a live-in Benny on the loose.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:13, Reply)
Better than one tied to a tree?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:15, Reply)
No.
If you have a Benny then you should keep them tied to a tree.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:19, Reply)
The closest thing to a tree around here is a lampost.
That will do though yeah?
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:20, Reply)
I'm sure it will be fine

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:23, Reply)
i'm surprised that hasn't put your boyfriend off

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:20, Reply)
He's only a little bit gay.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:23, Reply)
Who was that band he wanted to bum?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:24, Reply)
Hanson? BSB? N*SYNC?
I've told him already Joey Fatone from N*SYNC is mine, but he can have Lance.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:25, Reply)
So you're a chubby chaser?
Gonz will be delighted
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:31, Reply)
oh no i meant cos he likes em young

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:26, Reply)
Oh right. Well, this is a little bit awkward.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:27, Reply)
i also don't have any breasts, so thanks for rubbing that in too

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:28, Reply)
Get involved in Kroney's timeshare.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:30, Reply)
whats that? does kroney have a timeshare of someone's breasts?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:31, Reply)
Hang about, then I'd have less boob time.
I'm not sure I like that idea, even if I do get a lower monthly fee.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:32, Reply)

breasts, so thanks for rubbing that in too thing worthwhile to say, so if you'll excuse me, I'm off to DMAAKM
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:31, Reply)
i'd rather not if its all the same to you, my mum would miss me terribly

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:32, Reply)
This is sick burn of the week

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:39, Reply)
I'm not a massive bender
but my colleagues are. None of them want to go to the pub with me, I'm busy and it's FAR TOO BLOODY WARM in the lab.
/grumpy
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:26, Reply)
I'd be up for a pint.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:29, Reply)
You're not here though, are you?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:30, Reply)
No. I'm not.
I was just trying to make you feel more popular.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:32, Reply)
Every time I go to the pub in Slough
I get stabbed. Fact.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:34, Reply)

+ in the bum by a bot-dog.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:37, Reply)
Nice of you to write me a thread old boy
I am huge football fan, my favourite food is curry (spicy as you like), I do free weights, press-ups and sit-ups every day, have a tattoo, enjoy unnecessarily violent films, have been involved in several fights (mostly - NOT all, however - on the losing side) and, regardless of what any of you may think, Ballroom dancing is a very masculine pasttime.

Grunt.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:35, Reply)
How?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:36, Reply)
because it takes plenty of balls to swan around room full of them

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:36, Reply)
Alright Hiawatha
Think about it. The basic principle of Ballroom dancing is that the man leads and the woman follows. If anything else is apparent, the judges mark you down and your teacher tells you off. The man is categorically in charge. Only way I ever know how that feels.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:38, Reply)
It also involves prancing about in fake tan and sequins

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:41, Reply)
No it doesn't
That's Latin dancing, which I will admit is camp as tits. In Ballroom traditional dress is either a shirt, waistcoat and tie, or white tie and tails.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:42, Reply)

tiehotpants
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:45, Reply)
So, when you've done competitions
in which you've admitted the whole fake tan business, that was latin dancing?
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:46, Reply)
I've never worn fake tan, although doubtless I'll get pressganged into it when we move up the rankings
But yes, being an horrific shade of orange is traditional in Latin, not Ballroom. Competitions always have a Ballroom and a Latin section - men can often be found whacking obscene amounts of foundation on in between the two.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:50, Reply)
Dancing and fighting are very similar, all about balance.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:47, Reply)
i imagine you'd be great at both, what with your heavyset figure and low centre of gravity

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:48, Reply)
Wanna dance?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:51, Reply)
I'm better at dancing
This generally counts for very little in a mugging
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:50, Reply)
Especially
When they are Break dance fighting... bring on the Electric Boogaloo
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:51, Reply)
Tangles you utter quender.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:50, Reply)
Is it me or did it just get vainer in here?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:51, Reply)
it's just you that got vainer.
Veinier, like a massive shaft in fact.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:00, Reply)
Well,
I'm good with machinery, enjoy a good rugby league game, can drink my own weight in beer and remain upright, strongly disapprove of male vanity, and I'm a collossal tight get.

Also I believe Twilight, X-Factor and reality TV can fuck right off, then when they get there they can fuck off again.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:25, Reply)

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