Good evening, Infidels.
Generic shut-in thread.

Micro met my parents today. It went extremely well & very well humoured all round. She's now asleep & I'm wasting time online before having an early night.

How's your day been?

Alt: Odds on Nakers still being in the doghouse with his Mrs?
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 19:52, 54 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Glad it went well
Alt: Betting suspended it's a given.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 19:54, Reply)

Tesco are now selling cans of Stowford Press! \o/

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:02, Reply)

you can thank 'Mr Tesco' Nakers for that!

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:04, Reply)

They were a big client of his in his previous job.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:05, Reply)

I know.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:05, Reply)

pretty wack.
Got a cold. Just had some chilli (no lime or chicken, soz), it's clearing my tubes a bit.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 19:55, Reply)

Is it called chilli con vege when it's lacking meat?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 19:58, Reply)

I just refer to it as 'chilli'.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 19:59, Reply)

but the fucking bent Linda McCartney style cookbooks call it...
'Chilli non carne'.

I'm glad she's dead.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:00, Reply)

That's terrible. I hate plays on words like that, for example there is a fish & chip shop near me called 'Fin City'.
cunts.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:01, Reply)

There's a Chinese in Melton Mowbray called 'Wok This Way', I grudgingly like that.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:02, Reply)

I saw a cement lorry recently labelled 'Jim'll Mix It'.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:04, Reply)

Jesus Christ.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:05, Reply)

You just started me laughing.
b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1939016
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:11, Reply)

that's one of the shittest qotw entries I've ever seen.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:13, Reply)

Apart from it was an /ot thread
one of the better threads if you look real close you'll notice that you didn't take part in that one coincidence? I THINK NOT
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:20, Reply)

I boycotted it because it was about as amusing and enthralling as a night in with you in a locked house.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:22, Reply)

Well it's no "alright" thread I'll give you that

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:25, Reply)

precisely.
Everyone loves an 'alright' thread.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:25, Reply)

Idiot.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:19, Reply)

You should read the whole thread, you have some great one liners in it

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:21, Reply)

Not really, just a couple of worn out expressions about B3th. Hardly Wildean.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:33, Reply)

'alright'

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:34, Reply)

I am today.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:36, Reply)

Word up my nigglet,
My day has been chilled like a mo-fo I'm watching the "Lone survivor" whilst wifey and the mother-in-law are gassing downstairs.

Is this the first time Micro has met your parents?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 19:57, Reply)

Yes. It was the first time. I haven't seen them for some time myself, but she has got to an age where she understands that daddy has a mummy & daddy and has been asking to meet them.
Met in Windsor (sort of halfway), great time by the river, the park etc. then lunch in the sunshine. Micro has already asked when we can 'see them again Daddy'.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:00, Reply)

Bless, has the ex stopped being such a bitch?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:01, Reply)

Of course not. Don't be so fucking stupid.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:01, Reply)

Yeah, that was a WTN question

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:02, Reply)

evening H Double.
I am buying tickets for De La Soul on Monday.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:00, Reply)

Nice one last time I saw Q-tip live his voice was spent, it may have just been an off day

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:02, Reply)

you fucking twerp, Q Tip is ATCQ, not De La Soul.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:03, Reply)

They all look the same don't they?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:05, Reply)

No.
Rihanna don't look like Chuck D, does she?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:05, Reply)

Well I wouldn't want to fuck any of them two
However Noémie Lenoir WOULD
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:14, Reply)

Unless she's finally managed to kill herself

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:14, Reply)

Rihanna is a hot piece of ass

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:17, Reply)

Nahhhh that chin of hers is just freaky

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:22, Reply)

dat ass tho

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:22, Reply)

chocolate knickers

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:16, Reply)

Also smell the same & all suck chicken bones after a Chicken Cottage supper.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:05, Reply)

^

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:06, Reply)

'lime chilli chicken bones'

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:06, Reply)

Ha.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 20:07, Reply)

Just seen a TV advert which said 'have you ever wondered why Dominos pizza taste so delicious?'.
Erm, no.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 21:02, Reply)

They're better than Pizza Hut.
I blame the 2007/2008 Marketing Director.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 21:05, Reply)

That bloke is a total cunt.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 21:06, Reply)

He's a fucking inept pleb.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 21:07, Reply)

Fucking useless.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 21:07, Reply)

nakers could do a better job than him

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 21:08, Reply)

that's too harsh, soz

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 21:08, Reply)

Just finished
I thought you didn't have anything to do with your parents?

A beautiful heart warming reunion that I've obviously missed.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 22:03, Reply)

Cilla Black organised it, 'Surprise Surprise' style.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 22:16, Reply)

Surprise suprise!
Here's your son that didn't invite you to his wedding and now he's been fucked over and would like you to hold the baby for a bit.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 26 Apr 2014, 22:30, Reply)