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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Look right here it's only a fucken train thread for you jive turkeys!
alt: flan or tart?
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:26, 186 replies, latest was 10 years ago)
You've got to
sass it.
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:28, Reply)
No.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:32, Reply)
quiche, m8
Quiche.
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:31, Reply)
Lorraine yeah?

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:32, Reply)
goats cheese and red onion.
Goat!
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:33, Reply)
I have some of that blur prick's goat cheese at home

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:34, Reply)
he's a fucken knob
Blur were always a shitty bag of tossbollocks.
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:35, Reply)

Tossbollocks!
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:36, Reply)
I believe it's pronounced
quickie.
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:33, Reply)
i like quiche
i do not like fruit flans or tarts. cooked fruit is disgusting.
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:48, Reply)

but not as disgusting as your face!
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:50, Reply)
^ wanks into a sock and calls it a "girlfriend" ^

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:54, Reply)
This made me laugh in so many ways.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:56, Reply)
laugh, sure, but also shed a tear for the balding monk-head and his tiny flaccid pierced attempt at a cock

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:58, Reply)
This made me wank in so many ways.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:01, Reply)
you have a very low threshold

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:59, Reply)
You have no human interaction.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:00, Reply)
you glovepuppet your daughter

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:01, Reply)
You will never breed.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:04, Reply)
I think we can all be happy with this

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:07, Reply)
I can imagine a family of dozers, christ.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:08, Reply)
At last something the entire board can unite behind.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:09, Reply)
b3ta rejoices.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:13, Reply)
i'm in

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:17, Reply)
sadly, your spastic genes have been spread.
They won't be going any further though; you'll shotgun your wife and daughter before hanging yourself in your burning, bankrupt pub.
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:07, Reply)
Thats offensive to gloves, prick

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:16, Reply)
#whereistheglove?

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:18, Reply)
All cooked fruit? What is wrong with your mouth?

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:53, Reply)
yes, all cooked fruit
it's a million times nicer fresh.

urrrrgh, cooked fruit.

ming.
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:54, Reply)
wot, no apple crumble?

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:55, Reply)
Can you make us a list of everything you dislike? Because it seems like a lot
hhow was noo yoik?
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:55, Reply)
cooked fruit
meat
gravy
shellfish and other ugly-looking seafood
raw fish
sweet stuff on anything savoury
raisins, dates, sultanas, all that chewy shit
sprouts
turnips
beetroot
avocado
brie
eating with a spoon
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:57, Reply)
noo yoik was beyond awesome and into the valley of the super fab

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:57, Reply)
How do you neck soup? Without a spoon?

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 17:59, Reply)
Turkey baster

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:01, Reply)
Laps it from a bowl?

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:03, Reply)
I'm not sure that mocking an obvious eating disorder is in very good taste.
If you'll pardon the pun
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:05, Reply)
like a red setter...

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:32, Reply)
NO RED SETTER CHAT

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:08, Reply)
soup is the exception
i will use a spoon for soup.

BUT I DON'T LIKE IT.
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:18, Reply)
surely you can afford a therapist

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:43, Reply)
i prefer not to shovel my food in like a savage

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:54, Reply)
yeah alright love ... you have some serious issues surrounding food and eating
get help ... don't get help ... whevs
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:56, Reply)
suicide is still an option

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:00, Reply)
So no red onion And goats cheese then?

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:01, Reply)
no, i like that
but i'm not overly keen on it being a sweet chutney type affair. just roasted red onions and goaty cheesy.
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:17, Reply)
Jay seems like quite a sweet chutney,

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:20, Reply)
That's what he wants you to think then BANG! Meatsnake's full of jay

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:22, Reply)
Cor and nope

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:23, Reply)
CHOCOLATE MOUSSE WITH A FORK, A NEW YORK LOW :'((((((

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:12, Reply)
I told you she should have taken her own supplies of Ready Brek and Typhoo

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:15, Reply)
Not you didn't.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:15, Reply)
yeah ... it happened on the internet

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:40, Reply)
I don't use the internet.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:43, Reply)
it's probably for the best

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:44, Reply)
WAP 4 LYFE

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:45, Reply)
Christ, there'll be a Boston mousse party in protest

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:16, Reply)
Flart

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:04, Reply)
Alright TBONH

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:13, Reply)
Hello my darling!

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:15, Reply)
How's life handsome? New job alright?

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:15, Reply)
Yeah all good, God knows what I'm doing though...
how's the crushing reality of being back?
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:17, Reply)
Shite, but weekend now innit so not too bad. Got to the point where I really need to start finding a better job now, so, yeah...
Wicked holiday though, I might go on more holidays now. I deserve it.
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:19, Reply)
Have you been on holiday?

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:20, Reply)
Yes Jeff, Imma show you pics tomorrow!!!

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:21, Reply)
Sweet.
Can't wait. Where did you go?
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:24, Reply)
Timstiltonbuktoo

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:25, Reply)
+ dick

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:25, Reply)
You coming for a beer tomorrow afternoon?

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:26, Reply)
Nah sorry won't be in town, another time

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:31, Reply)
Don't blame you. It'll be shit.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:31, Reply)
Fuck it, ahm oot

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:32, Reply)
Shame. I'd booked a projector so we could have a New York 'show and tell' slide show.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:45, Reply)
It's fine the pub has a smart tv so I can send them via wifi or whatever that technology does

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:52, Reply)
as long as you remember to sneak in a slightly risqué one half way through for the classic "oops how did that her in there!" interlude

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:54, Reply)
the 'Jonathan King' gambit

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:56, Reply)
We're hiring!! How are your analytical skills?

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:21, Reply)
Dunno mate, I'd need to read and sort available data and arrive at a sensible reasoned conclusion to answer that.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:23, Reply)
You're hired!
actually gchq are hiring business analysts if you wanna be a spy, sort of
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:24, Reply)
I'd probably be quite good at that actually. SERIOUSLY.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:26, Reply)
We're hiring casual staff for Christmas, if your cv checks out.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:23, Reply)
Are they gonna guard you from angry regulars you've booted off the doorstep?

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:25, Reply)
They are still here, just grumbling in a corner.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:27, Reply)
No thanks I've already worked for one flawed company, run by basic business acumen lacking dildos, cheers.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:25, Reply)
If you change your mind, gaz dozer, yeah?

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:29, Reply)
Gaz messages are shite m8, just say what you gots to say on here unless you're a bender.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:30, Reply)
yeah I'm not looking for a job m8

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:35, Reply)
who would want to do anything thoughtful or creative
when they could settle for telling other people what they can't do for £10,000 a year and a free dose of smugness, eh?
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:52, Reply)
I dunno like Gill, beating the ombudsman on a weekly basis requires a fair amount of intellectual dexterity

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:55, Reply)
your delusions of grandeur are the only thing that is bigger than your shiny bald head

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:07, Reply)
only this week I successfully defended my firm against a 150 grand claim

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:09, Reply)
wow
HUGE sums of money at stake, here.
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:17, Reply)
oh yeah ... she's going to attempt some numbers ... this is gonna get steamy

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:19, Reply)
that's the maximum the ombudsman can make you pay
So firms don't pay out any more.
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:19, Reply)
you're definitely right at the cutting edge, sure you are

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:22, Reply)
christ ... it's like two tramps arguing about who has the cleaner arse

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:10, Reply)
Is he a knob in rl, or is it just a meme?Sometimes he sounds sensible, sometimes he comes across as knob material.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:11, Reply)
one of two things happened, as he went from being "alright" and a bit of white noise, to a bit of a deliberate twat
so either he is ok in RL, but for some weird reason thinks he is some crazy laugh on here, or he was pretending to be "alright" and is pure knob material in RL.

i wouldn't like to comment myself, but i will just say PIERCINGS AND SHIT TURD BROWN SWEATSHIRT.
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:16, Reply)
you still would though

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:20, Reply)
Piercings are not sexy?

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:20, Reply)
she's a middle class provincial spod
she's more vanilla than ice cream covered in custard
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:22, Reply)
go and have a hairy bagpipe fuck, it might give you something better to do
(for 1 minute)
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:23, Reply)
yeah ... prolly will when I get back from the pub

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:27, Reply)
drinking alone again?
oh dear
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:29, Reply)
have you seen the shit brown picture?
that would answer your question.

shudder.

this was quite amusing though: b3ta.com/questions/noselfawareness/post1800324
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:23, Reply)
I attempted a semi.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:26, Reply)
cheers

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:33, Reply)
your fat arse is the only thing bigger than your beakoid nose

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:11, Reply)
oh yeah ... now it's getting sexy

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:12, Reply)
u nose it

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:13, Reply)
Dozer is a bit of a nob tbh, pass it on.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:57, Reply)
you're more boring than agnostic antichrist.
Vagabond is funnier than you.

Multiple Sclerosis is funnier and more welcomed than you.
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:59, Reply)
Train travellers are all cunts
Discuss
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:38, Reply)
Glorified Olympic frisbee throwing.
Discus.
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:39, Reply)
This place is dead on its arse
Discuss
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:40, Reply)
I blame Dribbling Brainless Tosswank

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:45, Reply)
Depends.
Peak travel, they can get a bit close.
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:40, Reply)
Are you on a train?

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:44, Reply)
If CP was on a train in london I'd be worried.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:46, Reply)
you could alert CEOP to his presence

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:46, Reply)
He dunt like it there m8

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:47, Reply)
I think he'd explode like that whale that exploded somewhere once.

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:48, Reply)
There's a whale in the Thames?

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:48, Reply)

youtu.be/SQIsZbm8Y4E
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:51, Reply)
the whales in the Thames explode mainly on the train

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:51, Reply)
Commuting by train = slow death by boredom

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 18:58, Reply)
reading your posts = slow death by boredom

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:00, Reply)
Read more of them
not that I want you to die slowly of boredom. No. Wait, the other thing....
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:02, Reply)

by train
(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:01, Reply)
Fuck you, that's what

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:06, Reply)
bit rude ... no wonder people avoid this place nowadays

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:10, Reply)
James pushed his luck too far this time

(, Fri 14 Nov 2014, 19:15, Reply)

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