Is It Wrong To Retrosepectively Enjoy Your Farts?


OK so I'm not 13 any more and I realise farting is quite anti social. After the 5th time your girlfriend threatens to whack you over the head with a frying pan.. or you dropped a couple of paint-peelers at your part time job and the boss hauls you aside and says he knows it's you and to "cut it the fark out you dirty little bastard".. or people you've just met start calling you Stinky Pete..

You quickly work it out, and realise that most adults don't find farts funny, and it's time to grow up. Hold them in. Maybe slip outside and surreptitiously unload.

But what if you had too many lagers the day before and ate 5 pounds of Hershey's and the tummy begins to rumble? What if a huge fart suddenly gets loaded in the chamber and before you know it's out in the wild?

Is it OK to enjoy watching everyone gasping for air and angrily nominating suspects? Is it OK to feel proud and have a good old laugh on the inside?
(Big Ramifications, Sun 8 Feb 2015, 9:18, 24 replies, latest was 9 years ago)

Congratulations Mark!
Like how those 2 Indian journalists went up to a farmer protesting outside a police station.. and they tricked him into dousing himself with petrol and lighting up for more effect.. and then the poor bastard runs inside the police station screaming.. and he's in the lobby, looking around, completely on fire, SCREAMING, and he realises there are no police in sight.. so the human torch runs back outside screaming, thinking "what the fark did I do that for?".. before a passer by helps put out the flames..

Even though the video was horrific, what was done was done, and one had to laugh, didn't one?
(Big Ramifications, Sun 8 Feb 2015, 9:18, Reply)

Oh, Hi Mark!

( $$ ✅, Sun 8 Feb 2015, 9:22, Reply)

"girlfriend"
yeah
(old man river possible lesbian, Sun 8 Feb 2015, 9:26, Reply)

MARK! How's it going sizzlechest????? XXXXX

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sun 8 Feb 2015, 9:28, Reply)

Hey.
Goin' well, tough guy!
(Big Ramifications, Sun 8 Feb 2015, 9:31, Reply)

nice 1 mark you farkin ledge

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sun 8 Feb 2015, 9:35, Reply)

Haha farts!
You're mad you are!
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sun 8 Feb 2015, 9:44, Reply)

haha lol guffs!
You know, 'Tommy squeakers', 'beefy eggoes' and 'trumpety pumps'!

You're the best one here!
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 8 Feb 2015, 9:51, Reply)

Well I'm confused.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 8 Feb 2015, 10:19, Reply)

Alright mark,
How's your weekend been?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Sun 8 Feb 2015, 10:34, Reply)

Wait, you have a girlfriend?
Why hasn't this been mentioned before?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Sun 8 Feb 2015, 10:36, Reply)

it's the misplaced pride of the long term singleton
Men in their thirties who are such tragedies that it's such a novelty to be in a relationship that they mention it every fifth post on a moribund comedy website.

No offence.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 8 Feb 2015, 10:39, Reply)

sounds a bit sad
Funnily enough I was discussing this with my girlfriend, earlier.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Sun 8 Feb 2015, 10:42, Reply)

I didn't know you had a girlfriend, you've never mentioned her before.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 8 Feb 2015, 10:54, Reply)

I think farts are hilarious. especially anal sex farts. ho ho ho.

( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Sun 8 Feb 2015, 11:35, Reply)

lol gay

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 8 Feb 2015, 11:38, Reply)