Smug Yorkshire Nana - Mid Eighties
(the era, not her - she was two hundred years old) would sit, smile and nod knowingly to herself whenever "the threat of nuclear war" etc. would rear it's head in conversation. Faced with the inevitable question "Nan it's no laughing matter you know ?" She said "Well luv I've nowt to worry about, them bombs an fallout stuff'll not touch us up here".
"EH ???"
"Well tha knows Sheffield's a nuclear free zone..... an besides which all them CND girls are lisburns"

When she found out eventually that "gay" actually meant something other than "bright and cheery" she would whisper things like "ooh your friend Michael's a nice lad fer a Pansy Potter, but eee's a bit Gay-A-Y int ee ?"

Condiments were "condoms" - "Pass them condoms over luv, yer Grandad'll not touch his pork unless it's got pepper on"

She was also responsible for the death of at least 20 electric kettles, due to her boiling eggs, minced beef and packet sauces in them.

Awww bless.... (?)
( rabbitz, Fri 12 Mar 2004, 15:01, Reply)