The Lab Steward
When I worked in the lab at BOC, our lab steward (whose job it was to deliver gas cylinders to us for testing) looked more like a tramp than someone in employment!

Lank greasy hair, clothes with bits of food dropped over them - I once joked that if he dipped his tie in hot water you would end up with a reconstituted three course meal! The stale sweaty smell was impossible to escape!

Harry's shoes were holed, but no matter he was also a football pools collector and therefore had lots of old coupons with which to stuff his shoes! Any old clothes Harry found in a skip would be proudly worn to work without washing them!

Harry (or the practical joke I played on him!) nearly got me the sack! Most of our lockers were in rows of threes but Harry's locker was a singleton. This gave my mate Keith the idea to turn his locker around so that the handle and keyhole faced the wall. I thought this an excellent wheeze, but suggested the refinement of also turning the locker upside down.

Giggling like schoolboys Keith & I finished our teabreak and went back to work.

Harry finished his day's work and went to get his coat from the locker. He flew into a rage when he discovered our handiwork! At the time we had some builders on site who were laying a new concrete yard. The builders had just finished laying 25 yards of concrete and were sat in the locker/tearoom having a well deserved break.

Harry asked the builders to help him right his locker & was promptly told to piss off by them as they were on their break! Poor Harry's brain then decided that the builders were the culprits and having nearly ruptured homself righting his locker, got his bike and wheeled and stamped through 25 yars of freshly lain concrete.....!
( Vambo, Fri 23 Mar 2007, 0:36, Reply)