And our survey says: Part the Seconde
As you will have (possibly if you can be that fucked) read below, I used to moonlight for a company that did "mystery shopper" surveys for a number of public sector institutions, including the Jobcentre.

One day, I was asked to do a survey on a new Jobcentre Plus that had just opened following a major refurbishment. Part of my survey on this occasion involved talking to a number of staff and customers about their views on the new building. The views were mainly positive from the customers, and the building looked nicely done out, so I sat down with a staff member and had a chat with them.

"To be honest," he said "most of it is a good idea. The only problem is that we used to be in cubicles with security glass. Now we're at desks because apparently it makes us more approachable. Nothing has happened yet, but it's only a matter of time....EVERYBODY GET DOWN"

With a sense of comic timing that only the true mentally unbalanced can acheive, a man with a machete ran screaming into the Jobcentre and started attacking a bloke at the next desk. Luckily the security guards who were relatively switched on (not fucking switched on enough to not let the mad bastard through the door though) managed to take him down. I then had to abandon my interview and start treating the guy with a nasty machete wound to his arm.

That was an interesting report to put in. I stopped working for them shortly afterwards.
( Undercovercarrot got done for gross misconduct on..., Sun 5 Apr 2009, 8:07, 2 replies)

I think remember hearing about this
Thankfully that sort of thing never happened in the Jobcentre I worked in. About the worst thing that happened was the clients shitting themselves (I kid you not).
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 5 Apr 2009, 13:29, closed)

You know...
The classy thing to do in response to his shout, would have been to start dancing.

(Anyone else thinking "James Brown working in a jobcentre"?)
(The Incredible Sulk Finally remembered his password on, Sun 5 Apr 2009, 17:50, closed)