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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Morning Sporters
are were
(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:13, 2 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
What have you done to his family?

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:14, Reply)
molested them with his cow horns.

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:16, Reply)
Sexy!

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:17, Reply)
inorite?

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:20, Reply)
Of course
*engages pandatron*
(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:22, Reply)
Morning Ape
I am glum today. One of my best mates has just found that his leukemia has returned :o(
(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:17, Reply)
Insufficient postage?

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:18, Reply)
Yes
Typical Post Office - took 15 years to return to sender
(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:19, Reply)
Oh man that sucks hard, hope they can kill it again.
interestingly i learnt yesterday that to donate "bone marrow" they no longer need to drill into your pelvis, but simply take blood. More people should know this so that they can sign up to be a doner
(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:20, Reply)
kebablols

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:21, Reply)
The chilli sauce is the bit that hurts

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:22, Reply)
Is not how it's spelt?

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:24, Reply)
see below

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:29, Reply)
oh, o

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:30, Reply)
I am on the bone marrow donor list already
I also give blood and am on the organ donation register

organ donation sex offenders
(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:22, Reply)
I donated my organ to your mum just last night

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:24, Reply)
She was after a spleen

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:33, Reply)
I'm embarrassed now

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:43, Reply)
I've only got two strikes left - first time I tried to donate blood I went into shock.
In Aus they have a "Three strikes policy". If your body doesn't cope with donating blood while you're in the process of donating more than 3 times, you're banned from donating as you're seen to be too "at risk" to continue being a donor.

I'm registered as a full organ donor though. When I cark it, whatever is left and useful can be given to those who need it more.
(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:26, Reply)
I keep missing the donation times
Must sort this next time
(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:34, Reply)
I call dibs on the tits and fanny.
Double dibs times inifinity.
(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:43, Reply)
Gonz, you're not aussie, you wouldn't get jack shit from me.
Also. Actually, never mind. I don't want to know why you want my lady parts.
(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:46, Reply)
Because he's a massive virgin perv

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:46, Reply)
Fuckin hell, why doesn't he just PAY someone then?

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:48, Reply)
My and me mate have got £15 between us, we need £1.90 each to catch the bus home.... so thats £11.20.
What can we get for that?
(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:50, Reply)
A patronising smile and "try again later".

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:51, Reply)
Oh good, two double vodkas and a happy meal it is, then.

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:53, Reply)
Wait a sec, hold up here, you have to be aussie to recieve body spares from dead people?
Is this something to do with the proximity to asia and their billionare's pentient for killing people to steal body parts?
(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:49, Reply)
If you're in australia, and you're needing spare parts from dead people, if you're not a permanent resident or citizen I believe you're an inclined plane wrapped helically around an axis.

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:51, Reply)
I think one of us just had a stroke 'cus those last few words make no sense to me.

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:54, Reply)
An Inclined plane wrapped helically around an axis is a complicated way of saying "Screwed".
ie; you're screwed.
(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:56, Reply)
No it isn't.
See below.
(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:57, Reply)
Oh good, that was what I was looking for.

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 10:06, Reply)
I think you mean the past tense of the word which describes the use of an inclined place wrapped helically around an axis
Also, most decent screws are double threaded so it's actually 2 inclined planes.

EDIT - because what you described was just screw.
(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:57, Reply)
Stop ruining the magic.

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:58, Reply)
Typical Australian "Yeah, it's about right, it'll do"
That's why your opera house is so curved, the architect couldn't be bothered to go and get a ruler.
(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 9:59, Reply)
and they stole the Tyne and Wear bridges

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 10:00, Reply)
And stretched it.
Actually walking over that bridge is one of my favourite things to do.
(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 10:04, Reply)
Even better, present tense, means I didn't miss it.

(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 10:07, Reply)
I'm ruled out of blood donation now
I've played with too many bad things in my lab for them to be comfortable.
(, Wed 15 Aug 2012, 10:16, Reply)

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