my brother isn't good enough to buy food from mc donaldshe's banned from all of them in our area for driving dangerously* around their car parks in his sporty car...
* i think they were jealous cos his donuts were better than theirs
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Tue 11 Nov 2003, 21:32,
archived)
* i think they were jealous cos his donuts were better than theirs
I've never met himbut just from your description there, I can tell without a shadow of a doubt that your brother is a fucking twat.
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Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL,
Wed 12 Nov 2003, 13:11,
archived)
A Twat IndeedWe get the same sort of white-tracksuited, cap wearing dildos at our local drive though in Braintree. Spinning around the car park in their pathetic, poorly 'modified' Vauxhall Novas mouthing off the, undeserving, staff.
Fucking wankers.
You should kick your brother in the nuts.
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Wed 12 Nov 2003, 13:48,
archived)
Fucking wankers.
You should kick your brother in the nuts.
Did you say "Braintree", Gurnox?I'm from there... had a pretty crap job at a food additives place on the Springfield Industrial Estate. Job basically consisted of tipping big bags of stuff into a hopper that fed a conveyor belt, which then fed into another bag. Four girls picked "high quality" bits out of the stuff on the belt, I then had to re-package the stuff at the far end and load it onto a pallet. Ah, deep joy. Also, whenever we had a delivery of Guar Gum I had to help unload the container. Hot, dirty, hard work, and at the end of it you were covered from head to foot in Guar Gum dust, which was sticky yet at the same time slimy. And difficult to clean off. And did I mention slimy? And what the fuck IS Guar Gum, anyway?
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Wed 12 Nov 2003, 14:16,
archived)
Hell on EarthYes, I am one of the residents of the thriving metropolis that is Braintree. That job sounds distressing.
Have had a few real stinkers. I suppose the worst was at a well known insurance company.
My day consisted of reading the same questions out over the phone hour after hour day in day out never knowing if you are being listened in on by some Hitleresque 'team' leader. To call the job monotonous would be an understatement.
The only good thing about it was the anonymnity of working with about 500 other people. I'd regularly turn up pissed out of my mind and, on one memorable occaision, after dropping 3 tabs of very strong acid. I was found, luckily by a like minded soul, on my knees deep in conversation with the coffee machine. Couldn't stop laughing at one man who was genuinely called Father Ted. Oh, and then someone called with the name 'Kok Chewa'. I was in tears of laughter, babbling incoherent gibberish at two people who wanted nothing more than an insurance quote. To this day I have no idea how I got away with it.
Used to steal other peoples logins and attach comments to customer files such as 'NO QUOTE - Customers' house is built entirely from Terrapins' and 'Customer is really a woman. Is angered if you don't call him 'Hilary'.
Hated my 99% of my colleagues to the extent that I kept a framed picture of Charles Manson on my desk to try and keep them away and spent quiet moments firing paper-clips at them with a rubber band. Had to stop when, on one occaision, I drew blood. At least it stopped the grumpy bitch talking to me.
Last day was fun though. Had drunk 7 pints before I'd even got in (PM shift) and proceeded to work my way through two bottles of wine and a 6 pack I'd hidden in my desk the day before. The first, and last, time I've ever had to be carried out of a job. Customers couldn't understand a word I was saying on the phone due to my slurred speach. Just as well as I was mainly swearing at them by that point. Well, when I wasn't just automatically cutting them off to see how fast I could make the number of calls holding go down....
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Wed 12 Nov 2003, 14:40,
archived)
Have had a few real stinkers. I suppose the worst was at a well known insurance company.
My day consisted of reading the same questions out over the phone hour after hour day in day out never knowing if you are being listened in on by some Hitleresque 'team' leader. To call the job monotonous would be an understatement.
The only good thing about it was the anonymnity of working with about 500 other people. I'd regularly turn up pissed out of my mind and, on one memorable occaision, after dropping 3 tabs of very strong acid. I was found, luckily by a like minded soul, on my knees deep in conversation with the coffee machine. Couldn't stop laughing at one man who was genuinely called Father Ted. Oh, and then someone called with the name 'Kok Chewa'. I was in tears of laughter, babbling incoherent gibberish at two people who wanted nothing more than an insurance quote. To this day I have no idea how I got away with it.
Used to steal other peoples logins and attach comments to customer files such as 'NO QUOTE - Customers' house is built entirely from Terrapins' and 'Customer is really a woman. Is angered if you don't call him 'Hilary'.
Hated my 99% of my colleagues to the extent that I kept a framed picture of Charles Manson on my desk to try and keep them away and spent quiet moments firing paper-clips at them with a rubber band. Had to stop when, on one occaision, I drew blood. At least it stopped the grumpy bitch talking to me.
Last day was fun though. Had drunk 7 pints before I'd even got in (PM shift) and proceeded to work my way through two bottles of wine and a 6 pack I'd hidden in my desk the day before. The first, and last, time I've ever had to be carried out of a job. Customers couldn't understand a word I was saying on the phone due to my slurred speach. Just as well as I was mainly swearing at them by that point. Well, when I wasn't just automatically cutting them off to see how fast I could make the number of calls holding go down....
Yousound like a complete tosspot to me, so probably the 99% of your colleagues you didn't like had a similar opinion- - - - - - -
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Thu 13 Nov 2003, 0:46,
archived)
Problem isif you give an ape a uniform, they're giong to pull rank!
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Fri 14 Nov 2003, 4:06,
archived)
AnywayBesides, they had never, from day one of me getting there, given me any illusions as to what they thought of me. Aside from those I did not want to spear with paperclips, who were a lovely bunch, they were the biggest bunch of back-biting, untrustworthy, two-faced, stupid people I have come across in my life. Can't believe the crap I used to take from them on a daily, enough to make life a living hell, basis. And these were just the staff. The managers were a whole different kettle of fish entirely.
Tosspot? Probably. Self defence and revenge? Certainly...
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Thu 13 Nov 2003, 14:47,
archived)
Tosspot? Probably. Self defence and revenge? Certainly...
Also worked on the Broomfield Estate one summerTesting suppressors. Basically this involved connecting two leads to two crocodile clips, checking the reading you got and making sure it was within limits. Again and again. And again. All day, every day... Although to be fair, sometimes you got to try your hand at a different job for a couple of hours - such as soldering (sitting over a hot pot of molten solder - mmm, nice fumes) or high voltage testing (50,000 volts, to be precise - never have I listened more carefully when the boss told me "and whatever you do, don't touch that wire!")... ho hum, things we do for money, eh?
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Thu 13 Nov 2003, 12:22,
archived)
MonotonyYes, the dull jobs are the worst aren't they? Followed closely by the jobs that turn you into a complete bastard.
Worked for a company that sold 'charity' advertising on behalf of some major charities. A hideous place that expected you to sing the company song and would generally try to brainwash you into 'being positive' before sticking you on the phone to rip money out of people. The worst thing about it was finding out that, from the hundreds of thousands (literally) of pounds this company generated, all the charities got was a crappy magasine produced for them chock full of adverts.
Lived in daily fear of walking out of work and having a TV camera shoved in my face and some Littlejohn type bloke asking me 'why I was doing it'.
After I'd left, a national paper ran an expose on the whole charity advertising scam naming one of my ex-colleagues. Couldn't have happened to a greedier, nastier, more stupid waste of flesh either.
Mind you, at least I didn't have voltage to worry about :-)
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Thu 13 Nov 2003, 12:33,
archived)
Worked for a company that sold 'charity' advertising on behalf of some major charities. A hideous place that expected you to sing the company song and would generally try to brainwash you into 'being positive' before sticking you on the phone to rip money out of people. The worst thing about it was finding out that, from the hundreds of thousands (literally) of pounds this company generated, all the charities got was a crappy magasine produced for them chock full of adverts.
Lived in daily fear of walking out of work and having a TV camera shoved in my face and some Littlejohn type bloke asking me 'why I was doing it'.
After I'd left, a national paper ran an expose on the whole charity advertising scam naming one of my ex-colleagues. Couldn't have happened to a greedier, nastier, more stupid waste of flesh either.
Mind you, at least I didn't have voltage to worry about :-)
Sounds like... A pretty average day in a traditional British Call Centre to me...
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Mon 17 Nov 2003, 11:52,
archived)
Call Center HellYou've got it. Another good boredom reliever is the 'see how long you can keep people on hold while you get a coffee, go for a piss, sit staring into the middle distance e.t.c.' game.
Twenty-five minutes was my record. The customer didn't even get angry. Shame.
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Mon 17 Nov 2003, 12:51,
archived)
Twenty-five minutes was my record. The customer didn't even get angry. Shame.