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# Magic hat.....
(I helped save b3ta! JollyJack - a stench from the past, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:17, archived)
# ha ha ha
Woo!

that has cheered me up no end.
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:18, archived)
# I have flogged on
quite late this am so I shall place my Woo! up here and not 4 yards down there at the end

Woo!
(I helped save b3ta! Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - enjoying a post-meridian muncheon - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:49, archived)
# I too shall place a large WOO up near the top
in the forlorn hope that people clicking through the front page will say "What ho! Who dis witty genius with the smart alec answers and the gut-wrenchingly funny profile?", eventually offering me free money and sex.

Errr... WOO!
(I helped save b3ta! Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 22:49, archived)
# thats fantastic
tj: spilt tea on my dads keyboard last night, now some of the buttons arent working, anyone know how to make it betterer?

edit: thanks very much for all your help, sorry if i didnt thank you all individually.

i'll let you know how it went a bit later!
(I helped save b3ta! kingkong., Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:18, archived)
# either
spend ages prising the keys off and cleaning underneith, or buy another one!
(I helped save b3ta! tico, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:18, archived)
# ok
i'll give that a go,
i was just wandering if there were any magic tricks that made it work again :)

edit: sorry wheres my manners, thanks for the advice!
(I helped save b3ta! kingkong., Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:19, archived)
# well
if you are a magician, you could always go back in time and not spill the tea.

/helpful

sorry, i know of no other way
(I helped save b3ta! tico, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:20, archived)
# hehe
no.. back to plan A. cheers
(I helped save b3ta! kingkong., Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:21, archived)
# try here
www.maplin.co.uk/products/module.asp?CartID=040909092120318&moduleno=31998&Products=1
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:22, archived)
# bargain!

no, if i was to buy a new one it would have to be a dell one, the old mans got this thing about dell, nothing else will do (other than his compaq tablet, but thats a diferent kettle of fish)
(I helped save b3ta! kingkong., Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:24, archived)
# dell schmell
if he were a real man he'd build his own computer.
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:26, archived)
# Out of jam and iron filings
(Clunge_Gunge, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:27, archived)
# arf
(I helped save b3ta! kingkong., Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:28, archived)
# damn right.
i didn;t bother with buying an expensive computer case, i built mine out of plywood.

i also use mice in a wheel as a power supply.

and i have a bakerlite keyboard.
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:30, archived)
# like me!
(mmmm 4ghz!)
(I helped save b3ta! tico, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:27, archived)
# *whhooooosh


lucky git
(I helped save b3ta! kingkong., Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:28, archived)
# it only cost just over £500
when you build yourself, everything is cheap.
(also got 3gb ram, 256gfx and 500gb hard drive space :)
(I helped save b3ta! tico, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:29, archived)
# good man.
that's what i like to see.

i'll be building a new one in the new year.
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:33, archived)
# yay
it's soo shockingly easy, im amazed.
also, might i suggest you take a look at novatech They do barebundle units (motherboard installed in a case with a psu) at really low prices.
(I helped save b3ta! tico, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:37, archived)
# thats ok.
i do most of the IT purchasing at my work, so i can get things at trade prices.

todays deal is 17" TFT monitor £167.

also sony are doing the RZ Vaio desktop machines at £1295. but they are throwing in a 17" sony TFT for free (worth about £350)
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:48, archived)
# mmm
nice!
(I helped save b3ta! tico, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:49, archived)
# wow
yeah i think i will give that a go next time.
for just shy of a grand i got 2.8GHz, 512MB RAM and 80 gig HD.
i did get a lovely flat screen monitor though.
(I helped save b3ta! kingkong., Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:33, archived)
# aah
my price does not include monitor, mouse, keys etc. i just took them off the old pc.
(I helped save b3ta! tico, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:36, archived)
# ok
i'll bear that in mind.
thanks for the help.
i love all teh b3tans
(I helped save b3ta! kingkong., Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:38, archived)
# if you need any help
just ask. I'm trying to set up a computer repairs/construction business.
(I helped save b3ta! tico, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:41, archived)
# thats what i suggested
but he couldnt be fucked

so got us a load of dells instead, i can't really complain though.
(I helped save b3ta! kingkong., Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:28, archived)
# mmmm
cheap :)
(I helped save b3ta! tico, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:24, archived)
# Magical Trevor may be able to help
he might 'disappear'it though
(I helped save b3ta! Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:24, archived)
# Dishwasher works
But no detergent, and take it out before the drying starts.
Might work; might not.
For me, it worked fine (two times so far).
(I helped save b3ta! xandmi, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:20, archived)
# you are taking the piss arent you?
(I helped save b3ta! kingkong., Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:21, archived)
# No, I'm serious.
I really did clean two keyboards in the dishwasher. And they worked fine afterwards (they took two days to dry, however).
And they looked brand new afterwards.
And again: I am serious, but be aware that it may not work all the time and the keyboard might die. Try at your own risk.

EDIT: The most important part is to take it out before the "drying cycle", because the inside of the dishwasher becomes really hot and the heat WILL destroy the electronics. Thw water alone won't.
(I helped save b3ta! xandmi, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:24, archived)
# ok
i think that'll be a last resort

thanks :)
(I helped save b3ta! kingkong., Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:25, archived)
# ooooh
I have an old natural keyboard that I miss using. It's grubby and sticky. I'm definitely going to chuck it into the dishwasher tonight!
(I helped save b3ta! Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:26, archived)
# Clean it using a weak solvent on a cotton bud.

The solvent will evaporate completely leaving no residue.

This will only work on small quantities of the offending liquid
(I helped save b3ta! Attila the Bun is not in a right cunt of a mood, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:25, archived)
# am i being gullable for
half believing you?
(I helped save b3ta! null and void, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:21, archived)
# USB keyboard
It is perfectly safe to rinse out your keyboard under a tap if it is USB.... no lies, done it myself several times
(plateau, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:23, archived)
# what
the... ?
(CaptainMonkeyPants Doesn't care for it at all., Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:54, archived)
# Stating the obvious
Before you think about trying this... we're not talking about the keyboard of a lap-top are we?
(minister of heresy, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:32, archived)
# ive got loads of spares
if u want one
(I helped save b3ta! Rev. Jesse. broke his ankle, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:22, archived)
# thats a very kind offer
but i'm ok thanks, hopefully i'll be able to fix it, if not there are a couple of shitty old ones knocking around here somewhere.
(I helped save b3ta! kingkong., Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:27, archived)
# I threw up on my keyboard at uni last year.
I woke up and it was leaning against the monitor and full of a viscous green bile. I took all the keys off and cleaned everything with damp kitchen paper. Then I left it for about three days and it works fine now. At the time my computer was set to boot on keypress which for some quirky reason disables the power button so I couldnt turn the computer on. No one else in the flat had a non-USB keyboard either.
(I helped save b3ta! Nimble Colin camera-wrangling, globe-trotting whisky enthusiast, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:24, archived)
# mmm
(I helped save b3ta! kingkong., Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:25, archived)
# distilled water. Rinse with
Then leave keybouard upside down to dry naturally.

This may actually work. It worked on redbull stickyness.
(I helped save b3ta! bennyhillslovechild, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:31, archived)
# ooh
it started off soo good, but then the ol' rabbit into a monster trick occured!
(I helped save b3ta! tico, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:18, archived)
# Hahahahaha!
Nice wiggling action towards the end!
very woo, ace always!
(I helped save b3ta! xandmi, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:18, archived)
# stoo
pendous!!
(I helped save b3ta! null and void, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:19, archived)
# Woo Yay Houpla Panowie Hatstand
That really did make me laugh out loud...I'm now being looked at by my work colleague.

ps...anymore shithouse yet?

edit...yippee there is there is there is
(I helped save b3ta! Attila the Bun is not in a right cunt of a mood, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:19, archived)
# Ace, you genie arse
but it made me sad. I hope the little chap is going to make a return soon

(I helped save b3ta! Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:20, archived)
# fp! fp it hard!
can we have links to your previous work of genie arse?
(Mr. Partyhat, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:22, archived)
# Go to this site for his/her work

clicky
(I helped save b3ta! Attila the Bun is not in a right cunt of a mood, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:28, archived)
# oooh
this site is wonderfull
(Mr. Partyhat, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:30, archived)
# First time I found it...I was useless with laughter for about 2 hours
(I helped save b3ta! Attila the Bun is not in a right cunt of a mood, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:33, archived)
# Wooooo!
Brill :)
(I helped save b3ta! noodle monkey the cheese junky, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:28, archived)
# I like these lots, long may your hummus last!
Hooray for big pink monsters!
(l0fth0use - skip to the end..., Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:38, archived)
# Gene
ass
(I helped save b3ta! Bling Blong Bling Blong, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:46, archived)
# Excellent stuff
and another thoroughly deserved front page!
Hurrah for you and your superbulous style!
(I helped save b3ta! TV's Nosemonkey, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 9:56, archived)
# fan
bloomin
tastic
that
yay
(I helped save b3ta! mrRush, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 10:13, archived)
# My lord, your stuff is superb
and ever so slightly scary

(NoMoreFaith can believe its not bloody butter, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 10:19, archived)
# class!
(radical k Maker of stuff, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 12:47, archived)
# Fantastic!
His look of horror is priceless.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 12:55, archived)
# just stunning wo
: )
(I helped save b3ta! pippy is a truck, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 13:23, archived)
# THAT
is the best thing I've seen for *ages*
fantastic!
(I helped save b3ta! valley, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 18:54, archived)
# Thats bloody excellent!
woo! hardest I have laughed in ages!
(MajorDisco has stopped lurking for the time being, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 22:42, archived)
# oh my
that's fan-fucking-tastic.

woooo!

and yay.
(I helped save b3ta! Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Thu 9 Sep 2004, 23:17, archived)
# This is the best post in months
in my personal opinion.
Those expressions are fantastic!
(I helped save b3ta! Milkman Dan, Fri 10 Sep 2004, 22:19, archived)