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# check this one out,
like an old silent film version of the austin powers behind a sofa routine, its well good

www.videojug.com/film/how-to-clown-about-behind-a-sofa
(Cradlecap, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:26, archived)
# *bunker*
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:26, archived)
# Mind if I join you?
I'll bring caek
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:27, archived)
# Ooooh yes
But now we must have Tutt, for tea.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:28, archived)
# Braw
TUTT!! HURRY UP
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:29, archived)
# hurrah!
*brings tea*

i have no objections to being used.
(I helped save b3ta! TopUpTheTea you ain't seen me, right?, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:29, archived)
# *uses*
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:29, archived)
# *abuses*
(I helped save b3ta! Aphex The Mink Snackless, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:30, archived)
# *waits politely in line*
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:32, archived)
# *sells T-shirts from a stall in the que*
come get your "my mate used TuTT in a bunker on a flaming post and all I got was this lousey t-shirt and crabs"
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:34, archived)
# i only got the crabs from you.
(I helped save b3ta! TopUpTheTea you ain't seen me, right?, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:36, archived)
# nuh uh, I used the shampoo and shaved off all my body hair
Dixon gave it to me
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:36, archived)
# oh yeah, can I have my shampoo and razor back please?
*scratches*
(I helped save b3ta! ivesb Highly specialised Clinical Physiologist crapbag, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:45, archived)
# erm, sure
you may want to burn them first before use
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:48, archived)
# Wow, flammable shampoo!
That's got to be the coolest thing ever!
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:51, archived)
# Not really
its a tad on the hot side
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:55, archived)
# Do you sell crabs too?
*crosses crabs off "K. Weasels list of shit that he really wants"*
(I helped save b3ta! AutoPrawn is glad we're living in the future now, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:36, archived)
# crabs are good for eating genital warts
they are at the top of the parasitic food chain
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:37, archived)
# Great! I'll take five!
No need for a bag, I'll just put them down my trousers
(I helped save b3ta! AutoPrawn is glad we're living in the future now, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:38, archived)
# "K. Weasels list of shit that he really wants"
No5. a damn good thrashing. from me.
(I helped save b3ta! ivesb Highly specialised Clinical Physiologist crapbag, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:38, archived)
# Oh yea? And whats on your list?
*snatches ivesb's "list of shit he really wants"*
*writes "Years subscription to I Love horses"*
(I helped save b3ta! AutoPrawn is glad we're living in the future now, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:40, archived)
# the worst thing I keep having that little song go around in my head
until I want to jam pokers in my ears....
EDIT: *cuffs round ear* and don't snatch!
naughty boy.
(I helped save b3ta! ivesb Highly specialised Clinical Physiologist crapbag, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:42, archived)
# I'm genuinely suspicious of every link on b3ta now
In case karmic justice is out to get me
(I helped save b3ta! AutoPrawn is glad we're living in the future now, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:44, archived)
# I sing it all the time
theres a site on how to block it here
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:46, archived)
#
I hate you all
(I helped save b3ta! ivesb Highly specialised Clinical Physiologist crapbag, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:47, archived)
# Hahaha
High five!
(I helped save b3ta! AutoPrawn is glad we're living in the future now, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:49, archived)
# Double Team!
*roasts*
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:50, archived)
# get off me you perverts!
DAD!
(I helped save b3ta! ivesb Highly specialised Clinical Physiologist crapbag, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:52, archived)
# I started dating a girl once
who told me of her room mate who had them,
he and another room mate used to race them accross a kitchen table.

That relationship didn't last
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:38, archived)
# that's what happens when the crabs are slow
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:39, archived)
# Whyever not?
O_o
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:41, archived)
# I left her for the fella with crabs of course
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:42, archived)
# Haha, of course.
*slaps forehead*
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:45, archived)
# My mate had a pet crab
But he wasn't sure what it ate.

So he tried lots of things. That's how I'm one of the few people who knows that crabs don't like fish fingers, regardless of how many times they're poked in the face with one.

Poor crab. I think he went back to the shop in the end.

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:38, archived)
# Best story ever!
(I helped save b3ta! cooler_king That's no moon!, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:43, archived)
# ^this^
(I helped save b3ta! ivesb Highly specialised Clinical Physiologist crapbag, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:46, archived)
# that^
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:47, archived)
# the other^
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:48, archived)
# Poor Mr Crab.
not Mr Krabbs, you understand.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:47, archived)
# arr! me first dollar!
(I helped save b3ta! ivesb Highly specialised Clinical Physiologist crapbag, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:49, archived)
# hahaha!
(I helped save b3ta! ivesb Highly specialised Clinical Physiologist crapbag, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:36, archived)
# *jostles at the back*
hurry up!
(I helped save b3ta! ivesb Highly specialised Clinical Physiologist crapbag, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:35, archived)
# Don't raise my hopes like that....
And it's more for your fragrant company, but if I'd have said that you might have felt a bit worried.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:34, archived)
# cake, you say
*joins*
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:33, archived)
# *cuts a slice*
More tea?
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:38, archived)
# room for a little one?
(I helped save b3ta! RiffRaff lurking like a lurky thing, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:27, archived)
# Ooh, that saves me unlocking mine - can I come in?
I promise I'll keep my trousers on / I promise I'll take my trousers off*



*delete as appropriate
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:29, archived)
#
I promise I'll keep my trousers on / I promise I'll take my trousers off*
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:30, archived)
# *Sneaks into Kenny Bunker*
*Goes through all the Cupboards and draws*
*Tries to play twister alone*
*Sobs*
(I helped save b3ta! Spenface ALWAYS hangs in the Buffalo Stance, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:30, archived)
# Aw, bless.
Bring the twister over here, we can all play =)
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:37, archived)
# Yay!
(I helped save b3ta! Spenface ALWAYS hangs in the Buffalo Stance, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:43, archived)
# But make sure you lock my bunker after you!
I don't want anyone else using it.
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:46, archived)
# *Locks*
*Copies Key*
Heh Heh
(I helped save b3ta! Spenface ALWAYS hangs in the Buffalo Stance, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:49, archived)
# OFF
ALWAYS OFF
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:37, archived)
# Hmm, you say off, Dave says on.
*cuts trousers in half*

Okay, left side off, right side on. Everyone's a winner!
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:40, archived)
# How did you know the left side was my favourite?
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:42, archived)
# I didn't, I just dress to the left.
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:46, archived)
# So I get willy on my trouserless side?
Or are you keeping your knickers on?
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:49, archived)
# That's entirely up to you dear =)
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:58, archived)
# OFF!
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 12:01, archived)
# \o/
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 12:11, archived)
# no.
(I helped save b3ta! TopUpTheTea you ain't seen me, right?, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:28, archived)
# *uses stolen ID to gain entry to KM's bunker*
not in a gay way.
Ok, only a little bit.
Ok, in the gay way
(I helped save b3ta! AutoPrawn is glad we're living in the future now, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:29, archived)
# it's the only way!*


*allegedly
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:43, archived)
# I'm going to buy
Britney's hair and then make a makeshift sofa with it. That'll be awesome.

Also, last night, I had a dream where I was friends with the cast of Stargate SG-1 and simultaneously had a pet that was a
really, really small dolphin, it was about the size of a small cat, but then it started doing poos on me like a bird, and tried to attach
itself to my face, so I threw it out of the car window.

Anyone else have any decent dreams?
(I helped save b3ta! The Neville What what what, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:30, archived)
# I had my recurring KitKat stairs dream
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:31, archived)
# I dremt of you
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:32, archived)
# interesting
I had a mildly erotic dream about a female b3tan. but for fun, I'm not going to say who it is :)
(I helped save b3ta! Weetobix, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:32, archived)
# i dreamt that i didn't sleep. );
(I helped save b3ta! TopUpTheTea you ain't seen me, right?, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:33, archived)
# I didn't sleep
much either. I blame too much tea, and also staying up far too late playing Final Fantasy X again.

Damn that game.
(I helped save b3ta! The Neville What what what, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:38, archived)
# My interwebs asploded
so I went to bed at a reasonable time for a change.
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:40, archived)
# I've had a few odd ones this week
www.b3ta.com/board/6880663
(I helped save b3ta! AutoPrawn is glad we're living in the future now, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:33, archived)
# I dreamt
that I dropped two saimese twins' conjoined brains on the floor. I stuffed it back into their head(s) but they went beserk and started killing people. Then I woke up.

Ooh and I dreamt that my wife was nagging me to get rid of my motorbike but had secretly bought herself a scooter which was hidden in the shed...
(I helped save b3ta! RiffRaff lurking like a lurky thing, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:34, archived)
# Ooh thats sneaky
(I helped save b3ta! AutoPrawn is glad we're living in the future now, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:34, archived)
# I dreamt i had a BLT
When i woke up i made a BLT
(I helped save b3ta! cooler_king That's no moon!, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:34, archived)
# Thats so unreal
I mean, like, what are the odds?
(I helped save b3ta! AutoPrawn is glad we're living in the future now, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:35, archived)
# 1 billion to 1 i think
I'm worried i seem to have BLT on the brain today.
(I helped save b3ta! cooler_king That's no moon!, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:38, archived)
# Hahaha!
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:45, archived)
# oo 'ark at Nostradamus
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:35, archived)
# I had a dream a couple of weeks ago in which I was in the Indiana Jones mine cart scene, and I went off the jump and for some reason landed in a shopping centre.
And I drove around for a while, smashing through windows and displays (as you do), and then a car with no driver started chasing me through the corridors.

Then I was suddenly having an angry argument with one of my lecturers, when my flatmate woke me up. Apparently I'd been yelling in my sleep and I'd woken him up.
(I helped save b3ta! Walrus Man Think hippy thoughts, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:35, archived)
# i'm going to buy her hair so that i can clone her then shoot her in the face for being a waste of fucking space.
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:41, archived)
# what's this bollockry now?
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:31, archived)
# hello
my dear fellow may I perchance introduce you to the links board?

b3ta.com/links/
(I helped save b3ta! Crap Little Monkey Deathstar, so good they built it twice, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:32, archived)
# Hello Mr Links Board.
*Doffs Cap*
*Dies Laughing at supreme humour of own joke...*
(I helped save b3ta! Spenface ALWAYS hangs in the Buffalo Stance, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:34, archived)
# needs more deagostini
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:34, archived)
# this^
(I helped save b3ta! AutoPrawn is glad we're living in the future now, Tue 20 Feb 2007, 11:36, archived)