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[challenge entry] iWatch

From the Unlikely iPhone Apps challenge. See all 327 entries (closed)

(Larue J'aime le Pâté Chinois, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:33, archived)
# iDon'tgetit

Am I being thick or something?
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:39, archived)
# That dog looks pleased with himself
(I helped save b3ta! Rebel biscuit stercore sumus et nos esse novimus, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:41, archived)
# it's cos he's got the world's only banana necklace for dogs
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:43, archived)
# lucky bastard, also why does that fish look like a dogs head?
(I helped save b3ta! Rebel biscuit stercore sumus et nos esse novimus, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:49, archived)
# Ack, you just broke my brain
Guys are kind of simple like that!




Than I scrolled down, jeez. In America nothing is safe for work, to get a job you have to watch a 20 minute video about sexual harassment that basically recaps Mr. Miyagi's "LOOK ONLY EYES!"
(Smoked Oysters Yes, magick helmet! And I will give you a sample!, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:44, archived)
# In America you can buy an enchilada the size of Godzilla's forearm
but you can't look at norks at work

America is broken
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:45, archived)
# Oh we are frightened of the strangest things alright.
Got to keep children safe from nipples, and they can only see violence if they can't see the bloody consequences, also women should look like twelve year old boys for some reason...
There's some messed up stuff in any culture, I really wish we could figure it out right here on the internets, beer in hand.
(Smoked Oysters Yes, magick helmet! And I will give you a sample!, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:51, archived)
# I was in a chat room the other day
and a guy was talking about his degree topic of forensic nursing (to do with autopsies, apparently), and someone else said

"guess we shouldn't talk about that, as it's a family channel"

wtf? even discussing a job is forbidden, because it involves corpses? that's just stupid.
(I helped save b3ta! The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 0:11, archived)
# perhaps he fucks the corpses
then stuffs them with dead children
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 0:12, archived)
# well that wouldn't be a suitable topic for any arena, even b3ta, which is a hive of scum and villany...
(I helped save b3ta! The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 0:16, archived)
# where the conservatives "god and family" sorts get caught molesting little boys
and the liberals "do what you please" sorts chase women.
(I helped save b3ta! HairyTwatter certified eel and sodium salesman, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 2:18, archived)
# In her case I think you'll be fine
seeing as she's blind
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:46, archived)
# So she doesn't know she's hawt?
Maybe I have a chance!
(Smoked Oysters Yes, magick helmet! And I will give you a sample!, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:47, archived)
# She's also a lesbian though
in a fish market.

That's the joke, see?
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:49, archived)
# That's cool
I'm a lesbian too (though I happen to be male).

It runs in my family actually.
(Smoked Oysters Yes, magick helmet! And I will give you a sample!, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:53, archived)
# A male lesbian is called a gay
you are a gay

your whole family are gays
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 0:02, archived)
# Maybe that's why this generation of Somervilles has failed to reproduce.
Seriously, we're gonna die off.

But all the Somerville men are gay for women and vice-versa... The Somerville dudes are all carpet eating muff diving box munching clit smokers as far as I know. When I go out I'll naturally find the ladies in plaid flannel the most interesting people in the room, most of the time.


Kind of surprising that in a family so large none of us are gay for people of the same gender, really.
(Smoked Oysters Yes, magick helmet! And I will give you a sample!, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 0:13, archived)
# NOT ALL SOMERVILLE MEN ARE GAY FOR WOMEN
JIMMY SOMERVILLE IS EXTREMELY GAY FOR MEN
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 0:18, archived)
# AH!
THANKS FOR POINTING THAT OUT!

Jeez it feels weird to use caps lock.
(Smoked Oysters Yes, magick helmet! And I will give you a sample!, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 1:22, archived)
# LOOK ONLY EYES?!
WHAT?!
(Jeru War and Piss, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:47, archived)
# MR. MIYAGI???
Get some culture!
(Smoked Oysters Yes, magick helmet! And I will give you a sample!, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:54, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:56, archived)
#
Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!
(Smoked Oysters Yes, magick helmet! And I will give you a sample!, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 0:00, archived)
# Pffffft
:D :D
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 0:23, archived)
# I have many cultures.
I keep them in a little box.

I'm currently looking to swap or buy the ancient incans, and/or Atlantis.
(Jeru War and Piss, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:58, archived)
# I've got two lots of Sumerians - you can have one
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:58, archived)
# I've got some lactobacillus gg in the fridge
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan https://twitter.com/VomitingLarry, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 0:00, archived)
# I'll give you a quartz crystal for Atlantis
You can levitate pyramids with it, honest.
(Smoked Oysters Yes, magick helmet! And I will give you a sample!, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 0:01, archived)
# Man,
check out that dog!
(I helped save b3ta! wibblywobbly - helping ugly people get laid since 1982, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:45, archived)
# DOG
(I helped save b3ta! epiphany coming live from sweden, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:48, archived)
# keither sutherland is
optimus prime attending an iphone premier?
(Octo I ruin everything., Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:42, archived)
# Ahahahaha
that must be it
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:47, archived)
# Twirl
or die
(I helped save b3ta! wibblywobbly - helping ugly people get laid since 1982, Sun 21 Jun 2009, 23:44, archived)
# Bonsoir.
Je l'aime.
(I helped save b3ta! Crystal Magnet Like a diamond geezer, but better, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 0:17, archived)
# Racist!
They're called "Italians"
(I helped save b3ta! Donutposse www.myspace.com/donutposse, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 0:41, archived)
# Oh my god that is so racist.
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 22 Jun 2009, 1:49, archived)