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This is a question Housemates

Catch21 says "I go out of my way to make life hell for my shitty middle-class housemates who go running to the landlord every time I break wind". Weird housemates are the gift that keep on giving - tell us about yours.

(, Thu 26 Feb 2009, 13:28)
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Ok it was wrong but it felt sooooo good.
I've lived with quite a few blokes in my time (not like THAT.. housemates) and most of the time they are fine... however, one guy we'll call Stuart for that is what his Mum called him, used to always piss a little bit on my bathroom floor when having a slash. I mean how hard can it be to hit a hole a foot across with something you can point with? I digress. So as I knew he'd never ever stop doing it, whenever I found his little golden shower on the toilet floor I would dip his toothbrush in it and stick it back in his toothmug. And then smile, smugly to myself. Don't piss on my floor. It's not cool.
(, Sat 28 Feb 2009, 21:56, 6 replies)
You were probably doing him a favour
as piss is a very good antiseptic :)
(, Sun 1 Mar 2009, 13:18, closed)
Harder than you think.
Once you're pissing it's easy to aim, but the initial aim is pure guesswork, and the initial stream can be a little unpredictable.
(, Sun 1 Mar 2009, 14:34, closed)
it's clear you've never owned a penis
it's slightly harder than it looks

(hur hur, i said hard)
(, Sun 1 Mar 2009, 18:43, closed)
Sometimes you get excess spray
depending on flacidity of said cock.
(, Mon 2 Mar 2009, 1:56, closed)
And drippage.
Don't forget the drippage.
(, Mon 2 Mar 2009, 11:51, closed)
Worst of all tho...
.....is The Early Morning Pube Split Double Stream - a horrible situation that only occurs on the first piss of the day.

This is where a pube or other bit of night time detritus has lodged in the jap a bit (or the eye has glued itself shut in the centre), causing the piss to jet out in 2 streams, usually around 30 degrees apart and on different elevation tracks.

It's impossible to slow or stop the first piss of the morning, and you have to quickly hop around trying to find an angle that allows both streams to hit the loo, while simultanously trying to rectify the problem without pissing on your fingers.

It's like the fucking Krypton Factor. If Gordon Burns was into watersports.
(, Tue 3 Mar 2009, 10:43, closed)

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