Afternoon O/T
On the radio this morning they were talking about a study the French have been doing, the outcome seems to be that Parisians are rude! When did you last have a “no shit Sherlock moment”?

Alt: So some sports day is kicking off today, how is it affecting you?

Alt:Alt: Plans for the weekend, got any if so share them with us? (If it’s got anything to do with what new mobile phone you maybe getting keep that fucker to yourself).
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 12:46, 58 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Fuck off

( Kroney, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 12:47, Reply)

It’s not supposed to be a personnel attack on you, chill Winston

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 12:50, Reply)

If he thought that he would have run away/surrenderd

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 12:56, Reply)

Whiteflaglolz
The French roadside assistance
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:00, Reply)

I had to call them out to sort a gearbox breakdown once
When they'd finished the car had 1 forward gear and 6 reverse.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:04, Reply)

LTI

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:13, Reply)

*something about Fokkers*

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:19, Reply)

Mrs Vagabond is one of those Irishes.
She's also quite fond of wearing black clothes.

When we got hitched last year in Vegas, I thought I'd get her a parasol to keep the sun off her pale skin.

I thought I'd get her a black one, to go with her general attire.

I thought it would be useful if the parasol were also waterproof, just in case it did rain any time during our honeymoon.

... and it was then that I realised.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 12:51, Reply)

that you were marrying a miserable goth?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 12:54, Reply)

Mrs Vagabond is very happy.
As would you be if you'd met me.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 12:56, Reply)

are you threatening to bum me?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 12:57, Reply)

Always.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:11, Reply)

To be sure

(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:12, Reply)

i used to have a parasol
it was great and works as an eccentric affectation. I might have to get one again
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 12:56, Reply)

"i am a la-ady!"

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 12:57, Reply)

I've got to convince someone

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:02, Reply)

flash 'em your growler

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:03, Reply)

...that you were a massive chutney and your marriage was a sham?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:04, Reply)

Yes.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:12, Reply)

There's a thing about Roald Dahl on radio 4 at the moment.
He fucked hemingways wife.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 12:55, Reply)

He fucked a few peoples' wives
he was a spy and shit.
( Kroney, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 12:56, Reply)

Cool guy

(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:01, Reply)

His ancestor is who dahlia flowers are named after.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:05, Reply)

His grandfather was the first person to bring spicy lentils back from india

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:06, Reply)

His uncle was the first person to say 'doll' in an American accent.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:11, Reply)

His niece once tried to copyright 36.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:13, Reply)

He is the Stig AICMFP

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:20, Reply)

No you're confusing Roald Dahl with Nigel Mansell.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:21, Reply)

his granddaughter is gorgeous.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:10, Reply)

He wrote "books" for "children"

(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:11, Reply)

The Twits
was awesome. I could almost recite the whole thing when I was about 7
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:20, Reply)

w

Gravity is a cruel mistress, eh.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:23, Reply)

Also they stink of piss and in kroney's case shit and piss
alt: public transport meltdown/terror attack/chips and cola or something

altalt: I am getting a new landline telephone, it has a curly wire and some buttons
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 12:55, Reply)

one of my colleagues looks just like Ted Bundy
Should I congratulate him on this?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:08, Reply)

Yeah.
And if he asks if you need a lift anywhere, accept.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:12, Reply)

I like this.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:15, Reply)

swipe likes it more

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:16, Reply)

oh man, she bullies me so bad :'(

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:20, Reply)

fuck me i hate the "great" british public
Had to stop to dial into a telecon at warwick services. You cannot get near the place for queues of cunts who seem to think that a motorway service station is the dream place to take the family for a picnic. Seriously. Who the fucking fuck DOES that?

And now a load of the careless cunts have smashed into each other on the m40 so this fucking standstill traffic jan goes back 3 whole junctions. Arrrrrrrgh.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:16, Reply)

See, that's called retroactive genepool maintenance.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:18, Reply)

it's called "get the powerhose on it and reopen the motorway i'm missing a wedding rehearsal"
It's like they didn't think about me at all when crashing into each other like retarded fucking skittles :(
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:19, Reply)

I always preferd smarties

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:21, Reply)

passed it now
They all look ok. Phew I felt a bit bad there. Back to driving...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:21, Reply)

Are you b3ta'ing and driving same time?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:36, Reply)

I know.
I mean - it's "telephone conference" for fuck's sake.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:23, Reply)

Oh god, I KNOW
I bet they're the sort of cunts that go to steam fairs at the weekend.
( Kroney, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:25, Reply)

benders?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:31, Reply)

i used to have to go to those as my brother was in a brass band
mostly I remember the proud, old bearded men sat in deckchairs next to old engines belching smoke next to a cork board full of badges and awards. Then you'd have to go watch the ceremony as a May Queen/Rose Queen/Stinkflower Queen gets crowned amongst 10,000 toilet paper flowers.

I was once just one misunderstanding away from being one of those Rose Queens when I was 15
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:47, Reply)

Lol
www.guardian.co.uk/world/2012/jul/27/carl-lewis-mitt-romney-olympics
(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:31, Reply)

how come its not ok for mitt romney to be racist about the uk but it is ok for boris johnson to be racist about greece and spain?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:48, Reply)

none of those things were racist
also Boris isn't in Spain or Greece
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:50, Reply)

rommney wasn't in britain
and what boris said wasn't exactly diplomatically delicate
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 14:00, Reply)

Fuck him, he's a prick
see some of the other things he said
www.salon.com/2012/07/26/the_gaffe_tastic_mr_romney/singleton/
(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 14:04, Reply)

PART OF JEREMY HUNT'S BELL FELL OFF
LOLYMPICS!
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:33, Reply)

HE CANT EVEN DO THAT RIGHT!

(PsychoChomp, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:37, Reply)

it's like it was made for the lols

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:38, Reply)

It was only the bellend.
The bit in his hand remained.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:40, Reply)

Still an endless wanker then.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 27 Jul 2012, 13:43, Reply)