How was your lunch?
I've been reading about Ahmedinejad, he's a crazy cat, seems to think other countries are destroying rain clouds and causing the Iranian drought as some sort of attack.
Who is your favourite crackpot?

Alt: I went to a chicken beauty contest on Saturday, it was a bit weird.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:33, 88 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Is that what passes for Hentertainment in COCKSford?
A toofer, right there
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:34, Reply)

that was good,
thanks TH.

It was part of a village fete, i went for the classic cars.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:41, Reply)

But you stayed for the poultry

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:42, Reply)

If they don't use this to advertise next year's event, then they are clearly missing a trick.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:46, Reply)

I've got a slice of homemade mince pie
And it's fucking WELL NICE
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:07, Reply)

oh HO!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:43, Reply)

Am I the funniest prick here
OR AM I CRAZY??
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:48, Reply)

Ahh, the Iranian Roy Keane
He is fucking excellent
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:36, Reply)

Anything that's wrong in the country, blame the west.
That way the people won't vote you out.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:40, Reply)

does this work if i become Prime Minister of France?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:41, Reply)

I think you have to blame the Algerians or Eastern Europeans there.
But the principle is sound.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:42, Reply)

I think our resident surrender monkey is on the list for that one

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:42, Reply)

Except that he had to cheat to win the last election, because he's very unpopular.
But hey, that's no reason for you to think that the Iranians are anything other than gullible fools.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:44, Reply)

Hey, don't go about suggesting that I'm racist.
I'm suggesting everyone, everywhere is fucking retarded when it comes to choosing their loliticians.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:45, Reply)

Typical, you can't even point out PsychoChomp's ignorance of Iranian civil society without the multi-culti PC Brigade playing the wacist card.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:48, Reply)

I had a curry, it was well tasty
He can have as much of our rain as he wants, I'm fucked off with it pissing down all the time.

So you spent Saturday afternoon looking at cocks?
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:41, Reply)

good old 'after dinner mint'.
He's great. Gadaffi used to come out with some great shit, Mugabe's pretty smart too.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:42, Reply)

Mugabe is pretty good.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:44, Reply)

I think there's another good one in South Africa too,
claims condoms give you AIDS or something.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:45, Reply)

they do?
does that mean my wallet has cancer?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:51, Reply)

Note chance

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:52, Reply)

That's true
that's why I never use them
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:56, Reply)

What, South Africans?
I use one as a speaking coach for my daughter as I love the mellifluous tones of their accent.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:59, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=v439zTOJVho
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:01, Reply)

I used to have a south african manager
She was a card
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:02, Reply)

card filthy racist
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:08, Reply)

It never came up actually

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:10, Reply)

I suppose it wouldn't, what with her only employing white people

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:15, Reply)

Nah
I work with loads of coloureds
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:45, Reply)

Idi Amin

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:48, Reply)

Our resident Ugandan cannibalistic warlord
He was great!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:50, Reply)

Top cunt.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:52, Reply)

I've not seen his genitalia

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:52, Reply)

I love Billy Connolly's gag about him
"When he dies, they're going to skin him and make him into a wetsuit for Cyril Smith "
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:53, Reply)

Turkmenbasi
he was an odd fish.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 14:55, Reply)

Hey Winders
I might be getting a friend's old mk2 golf. I am excited.
( Kroney, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:06, Reply)

Actually, this might be for Twoey.
One of them likes old cars. I don't know which.
( Kroney, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:07, Reply)

This needs to end
WP likes cars, is ginger, and looks like he's from the Tudor era.

I'm...everything else.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:10, Reply)

It's not my fault you're like fucking Siamese twins.
All you talkers look alike to me, anyway. I just seem to have particular trouble with you two. You're the pub one, right?
( Kroney, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:12, Reply)

Jesus CHRIST

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:12, Reply)

ARGH

( Kroney, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:13, Reply)

now,
i don't really like golfs, the engines in them are pretty good, but the styling is rubbish, and the interior is rubbish, and the suspension is rubbish. Do you know which model it is?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:13, Reply)

Course I do.
8 valve GTi
( Kroney, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:13, Reply)

Needs to be completely unmodified to be a classic
most of them are chavved up in some way or other
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:15, Reply)

It's an unmodified three door Tornado Red
90 spec. Its worst crime is that it may smell a bit of horses.
( Kroney, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:16, Reply)

Sounds good
apart from the smell, obviously. In good order may even appreciate.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:23, Reply)

do you know what year?
and what sort of fuel injection system its got?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:17, Reply)

90 spec, so it'll be digifant.
I've heard k-jet's good, but I've never owned one, personally. Changed in '87, I think?
( Kroney, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:20, Reply)

I prefer the 'Peter Storm' brand, myself.
Great water protection at a price that's right!
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:20, Reply)

Yeah you're right, we'd better get interesting again and discuss the merits of The Smiths
(!)
( Kroney, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:21, Reply)

At least there was some comedy ribbing going on.
But hey - let's talk about types of car brakes if you'd prefer it.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:30, Reply)

To be honest, brakes are only important if you're planning on slowing down,
i like to live my life...in the fast lane!!!!
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:31, Reply)

Hey Monty
Will you be making a pilgrimage to Lansdowne Crescent tomorrow?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:33, Reply)

I'll be wearing a black armband as I do on that date every year.

But nah, Notting Hill? Fuck off mate. Only for Carnival, blud.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:36, Reply)

I'm going to see Ginger Baker on Thursday.
I suspect it will most likely be a bit shit, but it's Ginger Baker innit?
Tick 'em off before they die.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:38, Reply)

Hasn't his band got a hilarious Fast Show 'Jazz Club' name these days?
I really want to read his autobiography, he's a really nasty old cunt and he's done some fascinating stuff.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:40, Reply)

Ginger Baker's Jazz Confusion
He was a dirty old skag-head before it was popular and has played with a lot of people, so I expect he has a few stories to tell.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:43, Reply)

Quite so.
He was involved in weed smuggling for a bit too.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:45, Reply)

There's some great footage on YouTube of him in Africa with Tony Allen in the 70s.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:42, Reply)

Now why would that appeal to a WOMAD prick like me, eh?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:48, Reply)

Hahaha

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:52, Reply)

88 was the changeover year i think,
yeah, you need digifant, the k-jet doesn't like modern unleaded. I'm not really big on golfs, but if i remember, the 90 was the last one with the gti brakes, or maybe the first one without. but yeah, the beginning of the end for the 8alvel GTI.

As i say, not a fan of them really, but done properly they are good little motors. Its a shame the golf owners have such a bad rep of being douchebags, the amount of golfs that are ruined by boy racers is depressing as fuck.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:23, Reply)

I'm lucky I'm getting the mate's
Decent ones are going for silly money now, thanks to chavs. I had one as my second car and I learned mechanics on it.
( Kroney, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:26, Reply)

classic cars do go for stupid money sometimes,
but then, if you are willing to do a bit of work, you can pick them up pretty cheap. My old Morris cost me less than a grand, and i've probably spent about the same again on it, and its worth easily 4500 now.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:30, Reply)

As long as this thing's got a solid shell, as it did the last time I saw it
then everything else is replaceable. I'm not averse to learning how to wield, but I'd rather not have to do so in the carpark of the flatblock I rent at, you know?
( Kroney, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:33, Reply)

To wield what?
Are you taking up LARPing?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:37, Reply)

Oh. Fuck.
Weld*
( Kroney, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:37, Reply)

patch welding you could do in a car park,
but yeah, any big jobs you need a garage. I don't know about golfs and rust, but most VW's from that era are pretty rust free, so i don't see why it would be any different.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:39, Reply)

Nah, they're pretty shit for it.
All around the wheel arches under the plastic trim, bootlid and mine went underneath one of the rear windows. Still, I do know a decent bodyshop, so all wouldn't be lost.
( Kroney, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:42, Reply)

Useful if you need some organic hand cream after all that 'wielding'...

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:44, Reply)

I hate you.

( Kroney, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:46, Reply)

Oh. Right.
I thought we were friends. I see. Righto.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:48, Reply)

Nope.
I only hang around you because I'm trying to sleep with Stunned.
( Kroney, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:49, Reply)

I'm really hurt.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:52, Reply)

Oh well.
*shrug*
( Kroney, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:53, Reply)

ouch, under the window?
even my morris doesn't let water in between panels like that.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:50, Reply)

Yeah. Fuck knows.
I guess either the seal was loose, or a weird-ass stone chip, or something.
( Kroney, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 16:09, Reply)

I DONE DID A NEWER THREAD.
(ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Mon 17 Sep 2012, 15:46, Reply)